something i cannot wrap my head around.

Yea game is totally that but its also a skillset you can execute. Manwhore taught me that to where I can execute the fundamentals even when i’m in a shitty place. That’s the skype training program.

What problems are you having actually riddlemethis? Its better if you are forth coming with situations past and present so that we can practically dissect how to help you. All this is vague mental masturbation.

to answer your question though yea, a lot of game is self-esteem, trusting yourself, going even though its getting hard.

ok well to be completetly honest daddy i was a loser growing up.

My dad was highly successful making 1 million per year but i never saw him and i do mean never.My grandmother raised me.

I was hated by everyone in school because we lived in a middle class neiberhood yet we were rich , i only had a few friend and they always had somewhat envy , i always wanted to connect with people and have friends but my past experiences in high school have colour my beliefs with insecurities.

My father had 3 girls plus my mom when they decided to marry. This is what my mother told me. And i always wanted to be good with girls so when i turned 20 after my military service which is compulsary, i turned to the internet to find solutions .I saw all the different

schools but the most success i had was with mystery method. I became the life of the party , attracting girls left and right.Yet there was a problem i was feeling that i was leading a double life.

i got a good job and had a string of succsess but i always felt like an imposter.

My biggest success was when i had a playboy model drop her mouth and tell me who are you with bambi eyes but i couldnt capitalise on it because i got scared in me with the belief you are just the same loser in high school this is all just an act.

Hey dude - welcome to the forum. 

You're at the right place with these questions. 

That's good that you've had some success -- because you know what that FEELS like. And that's extremely important to seduction. 

What are you doing when you "try to attract' women? How do you view yourself compared to others around you? Do you feel like your boundaries are being breached in some parts of your life? Are you unhappy with an area of your life? The short of it and you have somewhat of the right idea, is that you need to start communicating from the right place. (i.e. from a place that you ARE attractive) Everything will properly flow from that head space. It will be self-fulflling. Remember that. Do not attach any meaning to their responses or take it personally. View it as feedback. To highlight the self-fullfilling concept, when you feel good and operate from the head space that you ARE enough, well shit man, she's gonna feel that and she's going to get those tingles when you open her, speak to or around her, touch her, etc. . . but if you don't feel like you're enough ... well she's going to feel that too and she's going to deny you, or her friends may deny you for her.  

Meditate, continue to do those self-affirmations, and start patting yourself on the back for the small wins in life. You need to be on your own team here man. Did you eat healthy for lunch? Fuck yeah, good job dude. Did you work out at the gym and try your best? Awesome! Good Shit! Did you go hit on that girl? Well dude guess what, good fucking job. You did what 95%+ men couldn't even bring themselves to do. You're on a forum asking for advice on how to improve in an area of your life? You're the fucking shit for that man. You see what i'm saying? You're obviously a high value go getting badass who will FIND the answers in life. You are NOT one of those people who just takes what life gives them. This is only half of the answer though. 

The other half has to deal with outer game. So while inner game deals with self esteem and emotional independence, outer game deals with execution/technique/skill.   Outer game involves effectively communicating. I think your language barrier here is a symptom of you being an ineffective communicator. You don't get to the crux of things and it's a bit tough to figure out what the hell you're even saying at times. Girls aren't going to sit there and try to solve what you're saying in person lol - they're out to have fun, not decrypt what you're saying. Proper technique with verbal skills and vocal skills. When I say verbal skills I'm talking about how you open her, your humor, wit, charisma, playfulness, how engaging you are, verbal sparring if the situation calls for it, etc. Your voice should be used to cut through bullshit when possible. Outer and inner game work in tandem together. 

So definitely a self esteem issue here. You have to correct these wrong perceptions you're having of yourself. You need to cut ties with that victim identity of the past as it is only holding you back and has no purpose for you. 

No one will babysit you through this man. We’re all victims of bullying or ridicule. It isnt special or new and its not something that should hold you back.

i was bullied a plenty but that doesnt stop me from accepting myself as anything less. It was in the past. Let the past be the past and nothing more. Its not your identity or who you are.

You should get on this audiobook - Practicing the Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle - This will help you tremendously with your self image and identity issues.

The rest I advise training through Skype with manwhore. You have to be able to talk the talk as well. Manwhore teaches you exactly how to seduce women and become that guy with an awesome voice that cuts through the music and incredible verbal game that would put comedians and public speakers to shame.

Yeah Mystery Method and "routine-based" game guys are prone to heavy amounts of cognitive dissonance even depression. There's multiple ideas why this is, some simple some much more complex. But I've certainly known some guys that were pretty phenomenal with routines and maintained their mental health at the same time lol. Personally it just was never something I could do. I ran "the Cube" once on a girl about twelve years ago, ran an opinion opener on a girl another time.. that was it. It's just way too limited. Plus from what I saw they couldn't close for shit.  

So OP you say you were "attracting girls left and right", were you sleeping with them? 

i lost many girls when i showed interest. it was mind bending to say the least.

i didnt use many routines just the basic premise of holding court and ignoring the main target.

when i was doing the mystery method i had become a frame control junkie and sometimes it comes up even though i try not to.One day with an ex i accidentaly frame control a girl that was snarky infront of my then girlfriend . after we left she said she loved what i did. This girl that had done so many charitable things and was upper class and all love me for frame controlling some clerk while i though shed hate it.

the thing about this thats fucking me up is how many layers attracting women goes into i mean i was doing meditations for 6 months at a certaint point in my life and then it kind of clicked in the universe, if you beleive that shit.

i was getting approached by 10s i shit you not , the thing was i would be sitting somewhere and this stunner would sit next to me and after 30 minutes of looking she would just start picking me up. Again and again and again. women would be going crazy for me.

it was everything i ever wanted  but i became a egomaniac seriously out of control. and then it stopped working.

So you’re saying when everything clicked was when you were meditating? - Dude that’s your answer then lol. Presence. Letting go of the past. Operating from the moment

Lol this guy's a troll. He's out