Answer to a question of Group Dynamics

Feb 6, 2012

Response to a question/thread from BlackJack, i.e. THE Roger. I’ll cover this better in my 2000th post but wanted to address this as this was something he is dealing with NOW.

Hey bro

So I saw you approach a few groups and I think I have a general good idea of what’s happening.

One of the biggest things people respond to is social dominance. Especially for girls, it’s just their biological paradigm. At some point, maybe many points, you’ll have to demonstrate this. In ALL my LRs you’ll see evidence of this, of me interacting with a group and leading the whole thing, or demonstrating social dominance in day to day interactions. It can be something basic like interacting with a McDonalds cashier, or introducing yourself to all her friends, or venue-changing, or leading a group interaction, or holding everyone’s attention as you tell a story.

You can be “The Man” just with her as much as you want to. But if you can’t interact with a group naturally, calmly, and exhibit social dominance.. you’re like a one-legged giant. So lead the environment, whatever that happens to be. If it’s just you and her, ok.. if it’s her and her friends, lead them. If it’s her and the McDonalds restaurant, lead. By the time you’re ready to ask a girl’s #, you should be able to do it in front of her friends, her parents, her priest, Tyler, Jeffy, your mom, your dad. Jesus Christ. Alphas are very aware of social dynamics, and to be an effective leader, you have to be able to read where your people are coming from before you can take them somewhere else.

I have a good buddy I’m showing the ropes to. A few weeks ago he was trying to escalate with a girl physically. Problem was that he was hiding this from her friends, escalating on her while they weren’t around. This is the WRONG thing to do, as it looks creepy, beta, and shows you’re not comfortable with your sexuality, and don’t feel FULLY self-entitled to it. Everything that you do, you should feel comfortable letting happen in front of her friends, unless you realize she wants it, but wants to be discrete. Once again you’re aware of what she’s experiencing, and you’re able to lead her somewhere else.

Now you don’t want to be too responsive to the environment. Remember you are the man.

How do you calibrate this? Your mind is a powerful tool. As Tolle describes, you can focus your mind into different areas all at once. Or just rotate mental awareness. Keep yourself aware of the things she’s experiencing. Does she have a group of friends around? Have you met them? Does she want to know how you interact with a group or what her friends will think of you? Take care of it then.

Remember it’s calibrated between attention to her, and attention to group. Just to give you an idea it should by default be around 85% her and 15% group. That’s just a rough idea. Obviously if we’re doing math during a interaction we’ve reached a whole new level of chodedom. Other times I completely ignore her friends, it just depends on how centered on my purpose I happen to be at that time, how much dark masculine power I happen to be radiating at that moment- which is just a mirror of how self-centered I am on my purpose and intent at that time. Other times if the friends are offering a lot of value, and stuff that just naturally draws my attention, I might be ignoring the girl to hang with her friends. It’s all a dhv as long as you’re centered on what’s drawing your natural attention, not this superficial agenda of “picking her up and gaming her”. Obviously this is superseded by the “purpose and intent” I mentioned earlier. Don’t worry about this “masculine intent” though.. that will take care of itself- that kind of inner state projected outwards will happen naturally, and it’s not something you force per se, but you can get better at acting free and through your own intentions.

Now realize there’s going to be a learning curve here.. this is a new area for you and there’ll be some slight awkwardness. Cool. You’re the kind of hardcharging bastard that will run with this and never look back.

It’s 4th of July. Look.. Sparks are in the air. Go hit it up

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