The Big Question I Currently Have: Resolving this will improve my game- but it WILL be a process, I am aware of that.
Wed, 04/03/2013 - 05:55
I've been in self-help for about 6-7 years at this point (pickup for a little less than 1.5 years). I would consider myself a MASSIVE ongoing success story. I view myself as living, breathing example that a true dedication to discovering your true self can succeed and can take you from what some may call a "Hard Case Newbie" at life... to wherever I am at now.
So this recent assigment I have for myself, is not a "quick answer" type question. It is a question, whose resolution, could possibly take my game to the "Elite" level. It is that large, complicated and important of a question and assignment for myself. The resolution of this question, is not a magic pill because that's like saying, "Accepting Yourself" is a magic pill- sure, it is... but it's slightly more complicated than that and it is something that, in resolving this question, I will be working through many other success barriers, that I may not even know exist at the moment.
My question is the following:
"The natural question I now have is how do I go after what I want, intensely, without sacrificing my god given right to have a goal or a desire and without attaching to the outcome. Because when I dig deeper at the root of that question I realize that the way I feel about myself is tied up in the outcome of my actions. So my emotions are dictated both by the anxiety of failure and also the following feeling of pain if I do fail. I don't want to revert back to pretending not to care because I do care and I have the right to care but I also don't want to continue to allow external outcomes and situations to dictate my emotions at all. It seems paradoxical"
Maybe all great passages are paradoxical! Seems like this is a worthwhile assigment: To desire without attachment. That's passion. Desire with attachment becomes obsession
So, perhaps, part of my question is how do I go about creating "Passion" in my life, without reverting to "Obsession" on whatever level it manifests myself.
THIS, fellas- is the next stage in BuddhaGames life journey. And so it begins
So this recent assigment I have for myself, is not a "quick answer" type question. It is a question, whose resolution, could possibly take my game to the "Elite" level. It is that large, complicated and important of a question and assignment for myself. The resolution of this question, is not a magic pill because that's like saying, "Accepting Yourself" is a magic pill- sure, it is... but it's slightly more complicated than that and it is something that, in resolving this question, I will be working through many other success barriers, that I may not even know exist at the moment.
My question is the following:
"The natural question I now have is how do I go after what I want, intensely, without sacrificing my god given right to have a goal or a desire and without attaching to the outcome. Because when I dig deeper at the root of that question I realize that the way I feel about myself is tied up in the outcome of my actions. So my emotions are dictated both by the anxiety of failure and also the following feeling of pain if I do fail. I don't want to revert back to pretending not to care because I do care and I have the right to care but I also don't want to continue to allow external outcomes and situations to dictate my emotions at all. It seems paradoxical"
Maybe all great passages are paradoxical! Seems like this is a worthwhile assigment: To desire without attachment. That's passion. Desire with attachment becomes obsession
So, perhaps, part of my question is how do I go about creating "Passion" in my life, without reverting to "Obsession" on whatever level it manifests myself.
THIS, fellas- is the next stage in BuddhaGames life journey. And so it begins
Wed, 04/03/2013 - 07:04
#1
I don't believe its the next
I don't believe its the next stage of the journey, I believe that this IS the journey. I only somewhat understand where you're coming from, so I don't have an answer specifically for you. But if we start from the premise that we're all a part of the same consciousness experiencing itself, then the underlying journey should be the same for everyone. I've read my eyes out and listened to hours of audiobooks and it seems like they all say the same thing in the end. (Your spiritual guide/therapist may have had some different insights for you alone, but I don't specifically recall).
Access consciousness/the present/god through present-moment awareness (through "the now") or mindfulness. Entering a state of presence requires that you dissolve or "turn down the volume" on the ego such that it fades into the background and no longer controls your thoughts and actions. When you dissolve your ego and become present/mindful and enter a state of presence you simply are not emotionally attached to the outcome so you take action for the action itself as part of the process, the process which, step-by-step and layer-by-layer, is revealed to you by consciousness/the universe/god through presence.
I know this sounds too woo-woo, but I feel like you're one of the few on here who can understand what I mean. This isn't a magic pill or the same as accepting yourself. Mindfulness/presence is itself a process that's parallel to dissolving the ego. Its within the ego that the emotions are tied up in the outcome, not in presence.
Supposably, as the process unfolds, your wants and desires become in tune with what the universe/god/consciousness wants for you, so you always have what you need and only want that which will be given to you. When you are in tune with the universe and experience synchronicity you see things for how they are--specifically the causes and their effects--such that you inherently know which action is right action.
Access consciousness/the present/god through present-moment awareness (through "the now") or mindfulness. Entering a state of presence requires that you dissolve or "turn down the volume" on the ego such that it fades into the background and no longer controls your thoughts and actions. When you dissolve your ego and become present/mindful and enter a state of presence you simply are not emotionally attached to the outcome so you take action for the action itself as part of the process, the process which, step-by-step and layer-by-layer, is revealed to you by consciousness/the universe/god through presence.
I know this sounds too woo-woo, but I feel like you're one of the few on here who can understand what I mean. This isn't a magic pill or the same as accepting yourself. Mindfulness/presence is itself a process that's parallel to dissolving the ego. Its within the ego that the emotions are tied up in the outcome, not in presence.
Supposably, as the process unfolds, your wants and desires become in tune with what the universe/god/consciousness wants for you, so you always have what you need and only want that which will be given to you. When you are in tune with the universe and experience synchronicity you see things for how they are--specifically the causes and their effects--such that you inherently know which action is right action.
Wed, 04/03/2013 - 15:20
#2
Interesting man- Seems like
Interesting man- Seems like you're rivers flow deep.
I agree with a lot of what you said. That's actually a little deeper than even I would have gone, at this point- but I'm def. going to re-read it and be open to it. So thanks.
I agree with a lot of what you said. That's actually a little deeper than even I would have gone, at this point- but I'm def. going to re-read it and be open to it. So thanks.
Wed, 04/03/2013 - 16:43
#3
This is still mostly
This is still mostly intellectual for me at this point. Yes, I have experience brief periods of presence and a several instances of synchronicity, but I am not yet living in mindfulness and definitely haven't dissolved my ego. At the same time, I know that the process has begun and there's no turning back. I'll revisit your question as my own thoughts come into focus through experience.
Thu, 04/04/2013 - 02:15
#4
I was just watching
I was just watching Manwhore's 21 convention speech from 2007 and your big question really started to dawn on me, from my perspective this is how I look at it:
When you do everything with quality and passion your goals simply will flow into your life, you will feel entitled to them. It is not the outcome you truly are worried about, it's if you have the balls to pursue your dreams. When you set standards for yourself winning or losing doesn't matter, you become addicted to the journey. Who gives a fuck if you fail? You have the skills, you have the knowledge, you know that success is in the making. Instead of your self perception banking on the outcome of your actions, the outcome of your actions directly depends on your self perception. One day you achieve a major goal, and you know how hard you worked to get there. You feel entitled to more and more because you have proven yourself and you have shut your ego up.
Personally, this is some strong shit. I'm extremely knowledgable, I have the skills, but I have never felt at ease with myself to achieve major goals. I do quality work no doubt about that, but I have extremely high standards within myself. I have to be a bit more tolerant and accepting of myself, before I feel entitled to my goals.
Don't let the outcome dictate how you feel, let your dedication control your emotional state. Know exactly what you want and chase it down, be proud of the balls it took to start chasing regardless of if you catch or not.
When you do everything with quality and passion your goals simply will flow into your life, you will feel entitled to them. It is not the outcome you truly are worried about, it's if you have the balls to pursue your dreams. When you set standards for yourself winning or losing doesn't matter, you become addicted to the journey. Who gives a fuck if you fail? You have the skills, you have the knowledge, you know that success is in the making. Instead of your self perception banking on the outcome of your actions, the outcome of your actions directly depends on your self perception. One day you achieve a major goal, and you know how hard you worked to get there. You feel entitled to more and more because you have proven yourself and you have shut your ego up.
Personally, this is some strong shit. I'm extremely knowledgable, I have the skills, but I have never felt at ease with myself to achieve major goals. I do quality work no doubt about that, but I have extremely high standards within myself. I have to be a bit more tolerant and accepting of myself, before I feel entitled to my goals.
Don't let the outcome dictate how you feel, let your dedication control your emotional state. Know exactly what you want and chase it down, be proud of the balls it took to start chasing regardless of if you catch or not.