I am now halfway through Manwhore's skype program, and the results are so overwhelming that I feel like I want to run away now. I came a long way from now. I am 30 years old and still a virgin. As a kid I came from a background of bullying and I built up a very low self-esteem. I had this idea that I was a total misfit who cannot have girls. Most of my early 20s, I was in depression. I even had suicide thoughts of the fact that I couldnt get girls. I had good people around me that kept me from this dark path. At 26 I first got introduced to game, I took my first bootcamp with another organization and got my first kiss. I saw some light in all of that darkness and I got hooked to the process.
Nevertheless, I did not make a lot progress in the 4 years after. I was still stumbling a lot. I got a couple or more make outs, instant dates, and 2 pulls. That it! This is not what game is supposed to be, and decided to go for John's program. Things are really changing for the better recently,
I started the program 1.5 months ago, with hope of getting over my issues with women. Right now, I am in Mexico city, and I got like 8 girls chasing me right now. One girl even approached me at the airport and number closed me! I don't even have the time to respond to all of those girls. I am getting overstimulated and it is interesting how I am trying to run away from all of this. Last night, I almost got laid with a beautiful latina. I basically had her, but I was not able to perform. Here's what happened:
One of the girls from tinder has gotten really into me. This girl is a 29 year old mature woman, and I got her to my place. She is quite beautiful. An elegant, classy type. She lives with roomies and works as a humanitarian. We first met at a park nearby my place. My game was tight, I got to know her and also was able to flirt with her very well. I also was very capable of baby stepping her towards my place. The fact that she liked me very much from the start really helped though. I knew I was getting her home, and I was not getting any resistance this time. My problems really started with the sex part. I basically got Erectyle Dysfunction, due to lack of control over my physiology. I was too much INSIDE my head, not breathing well, shaking at times, and quite uncomfortable. I somehow did manage to get a taste of her pussy. It was salty.
- Tinder interaction
- The initial meet
- Moving the set
- The scene in my AirBnB
- Walking her back to the car (she wants to see my again)
It was really solid, and she liked me from the start, which made it easy. I took every opportunity to flirt with her through text. Attached is snippet of the type of flirting that was going on.
The initial meet:
The girl was quite cute and definitely beautiful, although it was not what I expected in terms of personality. This is the problem with tinder and online dating in general: people create a mental imagination of what the person is like, but basically are projecting their ideals onto the person. A thing I need to be aware of next time: no imaginations and expectations. The girl had a very monotonic tonality in her voice, and sounded like a very level headed person, as opposed to the very melodramatic Latina. This got me a bit disappointed in the beginning, but it was really my FEAR speaking again. She was clearly an intelligent women, and you could have deeper interactions with her, as opposed to those empty-headed types. I was making excuses in my head to run away, but I decided that I was going to stick in to the end and allow myself to get uncomfortable this time.
Even though this girl was kind of an intellectual type and does humanitarian work, I avoided getting to deep into these conversations. It ruins the vibe, and I really focused on maintaining a careful balance of flirtation, teasing, and getting to know her.
Moving the set:
I carefully pre-planned the date. Meet the girl at parc de Mexico, which is about 15 minutes from my house. Hang out and flirt in the parc a bit. Pull her to a dining place which was a street corner away from the airBnB. Then get her to the bedroom. What eventually happened was that we first went to get some “churrios”, a Mexican snack. She told me that she already ate, and I responded with: “Okay, so you’re going to watch your man eat in front of you.” She was with her car, and we eventually drove to the dining place where I wanted to go. During the dinner: I was talking to her platonically, but at same time I was touching her thighs under the table to tease her. Then we walked up to my apartment, I simply said: “let's go and chill at the place I am staying”. Then I said, "But you have to promise that you go easy on me okay. There will be no sex, I am a very traditional man”. She jokingly responded: “yeah, only after marriage”. My mind is still not able to process how much I have improved in such a short time!
The scene in my AirBnB:
This is where it becomes interesting and things got into unchartered territory for me really fast. She was sitting on my lap, I crossed her legs over mine. She came with the suggestion of watching a movie together and that she was tired. I was resisting the idea of watching a movie together. And I was slowly creeping in on her, making remarks such as “what kind of belly button do you have?” and then slowly lifting up her sweater and then playing with it. I then tried to slowly unbutton her in a playful way. She went on to grab my laptop to watch a movie, the battery was empty. I joked to her that i forgot my charger. I went on to play some music on my phone and starting dancing bachata with her. She said she didn’t know the dance, and also discovered that I was quite good at it based on how I moved my body. I spent a lot of time learning this dance. I initially sucked at it, but now get girls chasing me for this. She then started changing the music to Cumbia, because she knew the dance better. Nevertheless, she was not a vivid dancer, and I noticed that she was getting insecure and uncomfortable about it. I gave in, and we ended up watching a movie on my bed. When I opened the computer, my email was open and there was in big letters “Manwhore”. I was closing it quickly, before she starting reading things on the screen HAHA.
We decided to watch "The shining" together, but that turned into a disaster because we accidentally payed for the Spanish version, and we couldn’t undo it to the english one. So we ended up trying to fix this stupid thing. It was putting the mood down. We ended ditching the laptop together, and that’s where I decided to just go on her, and pull her hips towards mine. Her legs were crossed over mine, and I was taking her top off. I took my shirt of eventually as well, and I started massaging her. I massaged her. I started kissing her on the bed. Slowly working myself down. I made her lay on her back. I started massaging her and I slowly went down to her pussy. She was still wearing her pants. I then went on taking of her bra strip and massaging her back. She said: “You’re getting nervous.” She was also giving me directions on how to massage her. I was starting to panic from the inside for a moment. I then went lying on my back and i told her to massage me. She was tickling me and felt good I became calmer. After that, I started massaging her again. I think at some point she said: “you are doing the massage right, don’t worry keep going.” I flipped her around again, and was taking her pants off. Then I went on to take my pants off, but I was fooling around not being able to get it off. It looked so dumb haha. I then started going for her pussy. I took a big breath and went in for the plunge to see how it tasted like. I then moved up to her to bring my dick towards her face, but it was all soft. She touched my dick and played with it to get it hard. Wasn’t working, darn. I clearly had ERECTYLE DYSFUNCTION because of my fear. We then ended up lying together on the bed. I said “this is awkward isn’t?”, laughing a bit. She decided to leave, it was getting late. I went walking back with her.
What I noticed overall is that there was a very clumsy sequencing. It was clearly demonstrating the fact that I had no fucking clue how to seduce a woman. I don’t remember exactly what all happened in the correct order. Events went by very quick and my brain couldn’t capture it all. More importantly, I was not enjoying the entire process, super tense and uncomfortable as I’ve mentioned before. It’s unchartered territory, so I kind of accept it for now. It reminds me of my first time learning dancing.
Walking her back to the car (she wants to see me again)
In the end, she asked me “Do you want to hang out again? I was like: WTF, she still likes me after my failure to fuck her? When we were dressing up to get back to her car, she said that she liked my body and in particular my ass. What is going on here? This was not the first time that the girl mentioned this to me. During the initial meet-up, she was already making suggestions on that she would love to accompany me for a second date to Couyacan, an old place in the south of the city. Also, she asked me if I was planning to come back to Mexico more often in the future around the same time. She also was asking if I was getting a lot matches on my tinder, while she glanced into my phone and saw those fireballs blurping.
She is totally into me, it is weirding me out. "There must be something wrong with her that she likes me so much", "She must have some agenda", "Why would a girl like me so much after all those years of failing, she must be crazy", blablabla. My mind is working hard to keep me in Homeostasis.
Anyway, I responded to her question with "sure", but in my head I was like RUN RUN RUN!
All this time, I spent so much time “learning game”, but I only discover now that I am at the beginnings of learning the MOST IMPORTANT part of it. John's program really has put me into situations that is forcing me to confront my fears and insecurities in no ways I have ever imagined. I feel like running away from the girls that are liking me. Crazy shit!