Calling a girl out on her emotional neediness and False Affection Towards Me

You're really making an identity out of Tolle Worship, seems like to me.

Some women get a VERY powerful chemical reaction in them that causes them to bond to a man she's having sex with. Actually ALL women do, but to varying degrees. She may have that going on. I think there's a better way to deal with her firmly, but with a lot of empathy.

I don't like to talk about Tolle to ANYBODY except community or people that I think are in a state where they desperately need it. I do that so I don't make it my identity, like you're doing here. You're almost attacking her with it lol.

^^This. 

You are trying to identify with enlightenment but are not actually there. You're essentially just lecturing these girls but don't have the credentials to back it up. If you were truly "at peace" with yourself you would just let it go. This isn't worth your time and there are dozens of better, more impactful ways to deal with this. First of all, STOP TEXTING.

Quit going spiritual guru on this chick and just fuck her into bliss. 

Do you get off on this shit? 

I'm really annoyed reading this. I can't even imagine how she must feel lol

Your not going to "fix" this girl by breaking down her behaviour like that. Woman aren't like men and they find it harder to be introspective and honest with themselves. You will actually harden her ego more with this type of lecturing.

You should read way of the superior man(if you havnt already). He talks alot about dealing with woman and their emotional, irrational behaviour.

This girl got an infection from fucking you? 

Good point, I'll definitely check that book out. I've been meaning to read it for a while. 

But anyways, I appreciate your guys feedback. 

I guess I was just tired with dealing with her. I woudn't normally do this kind of behaviour. 

No lol. Pretty sure she just wanted me to feel guilty.

Funny enough, besides the first fuckign session, she pretty much initiated sex everytime thereafter. 

Yah I pretty much was attacking her with it. 

Guess I should have just ended it way before. Good call

I'll make a point to keep the tolle stuff to myself and not instill it onto other people. 

lol thats crazy 

lol thats crazy 

So you're positive you didn't give her an infection from fucking her. 

And why are you so tired of this girl? 

I'm HIV positive that I didn't give her an infection from fucking her. 

Well because I've been banging her for a week and she's projecting soooo much onto us. She wants to hang out all the time, she brings up exclusivity and continually says I don't value her and she wants to be exclusive because she doesn't want to be disrespected. The other day I actually handelled it very well and all seemed good. But her ego keeps resurfacing and she won't just let us be.

Here's what I texted her the other day to erradicate this exclusivity bullshit. 

me: Ultiamtely the only thing that matters is the time we share together. And that when we see eachother it's because it's the thing we want to do more tahn anything. I don't want to tell you what you can or can't do and I expect the same from you. I don't want to cut you off from meeting other people or limit your life in anyway. Your decision for whtether you see other people is exactly that, your decision. I will not be possessive, I do not believe in that. I just love being around you and that's all I can ever ask for. And I want the same in return from you. This to me is a healthy, loving and fulfilling relationship. 

her: Sounds beautiful to me. I really like you. More than anything I want you to be happy, and for us to be on good terms.  

PS.

I know it sounds like I was creating an ego out of the Tolle stuff, whcih could be possible, but I don't feel it to be the case.

I think i've just been so absorbed in his teacings as of late, that I've started to break down other people's behavior, includign my own. I wasn't trying to belittle her or make myself feel superior. I was just stating what I thought to be the case to offer insight. But I know, now, in retrospect, it was the wrong way to go abotu doing things. 

PS Manwhore.

This is the girl from tinder, whom I told that I had a 2 year old son. 

Funny enough, the only reason she agreed to go on a date with me, suppossedly, was because she loved the idea that I had a kid.

Yeah I'm with you on that, but if this girl is being this clingy and demanding you should just cut ties with her for a bit maybe. And you can't explain Tolle thru text, but you can send her the audiobook and tell her to listen to it and you won't hang out with her again till she does lulz. To get my mom to listen to Tolle I would sit there with her and listen to it with her 

Dude, she's jerking you around and playing these mental head games because of the frame you set from the beginning. Whether it be from your physicality to your verbage, she knows you're not gonna just stop and walk away without any warning. There needs to be an invisible vibe almost, that if she keeps bringing this up, she's getting nexted. Sadly, every relationship is technically a power struggle between two individuals. Whoever is more free from the outcome is ultimately winning. Hitting her with these paragraphs is showing you're the more invested individual and it's just foolish. There's a time and place to lecture girls. Usually it's when I'm drunk and at a bar and they piss me off lol. 

Hmm it would seem her bio clock is ticking away. Obviously use condoms with her and flush them down the toilet afterwards. This chic is looking to get pregnant 

Very, very good point hahaha! 

I pretty uch knew that nothing good would have come from texting her that stuff. But thought it to be an amusing way of cutting things off, which it did, quite well actually. Until she texted me just now, "Never cut what you can untie"

I suppose she thinks that I want to fix this and get her back. I think I may have to pass on this one. Way too much for me 

Dude, where's my boner?

ahhahahahhahahh oh gawd! Will do. Thanks for the heads up. 

And you're fuckign rihgt, she's already told me she wants kids more than anything in the world lol.  

*deletes contact info hastily* 

I could walk away at any given moment. She has already, in a week, built me up into some grandose image. 

She kept going on about how she was so caring and I didn't value her.

I decided that it would be appropriate to show her that her fondness towards me, was ego generated, not real. So she can stop pretending that she this amazing and loving person and that I'm just cold and obtuse. 

Might as well go out with a bang

Her feelings towards me, remind me of how I would view my crushes's when I was younger. That oneitis. Well she created that for me already.

So we all know the pain that goes with having oneitis? 

Well now I know what it feels like to be on the receiving end of it, by an otherwise very attractive and cool girl. But she put me up on some pedestal and didn't actually having loving care for the real me, but an enitty, something illussory that she made me out to be. 

So it's your chick and your relationship, that's kind of a man's business. I was more concerned with the apparent lack of taking responsibility/ignoring the infection thing, but now looking at it it's probably exactly what you're saying it is, a fucking ploy. Gawdamn. 

Anyways, it's fine trying to show a girl the ropes, but you're not doing it right. You aren't describing this stuff in a way that could ever make sense to a girl, and apparently most guys on here thought you sounded retarded as well. Lol 

@patrick.bateman

In my opinion you have good intentions and don't seem like a bad person. Im just curious to why you gave this girl the whole "I'm not at a point in my life where I want a relationship but i still want to keep seeing you" spiel. I could be wrong but it seems like from the start you didn't care for this girl that much so why put forth all this effort. It's good that you have these strong life improving beliefs but in this case it might have been more practical to just tell her "I like seeing you and fucking you but don't want a relationship and if you feel wrong about seeing me still then that's cool too". It seems unnecessary to send paragraph after paragraph about the whole situation when you say you don't care about her. 

It also seems very contradicting to talk about The Power of Now and the enjoyment of living in the moment in such an over analytical and time based manner. 

At first I thought you were trying to create some drama with this girl while you were away. I was thinking holy shit this is some good ass game. This girl is definately gunna wanna fuck or at least be super receptive to meeting up with you when you get back. Then you kept sending more serious "this is how you should live your life type stuff" and i got lost as to what the point of the post was.

Introducing people to Eckhart is awsome and could cause massive momentum for that person to better themselves. However G-Money had the right approach. You should do this by book or chapter recomendations or even send them a link to a youtube video to their email. If they like it and want to change they will do it for themselves. You can't do it for them.

I think you should check out Brad's latest article on RSD about how self improvement junkies get annoying. I've definately fallen under some of the categories he mentions in my experience with this stuff.

I'll copy and post the main points below. I think it will really benifit you to look at the reasons he points out and see which ones you might fall into.

1. Forcing new ideas on others because your shaky with these new ideas

2. Hating/shaming others for problems that are actually reflected in yourself

3. Developing an ego over # of books read (knowledge/new ideas)

4. Becoming too goal oriented instead of process oriented.