Chris' 30 day-challenge
So I will do a thirty-day challenge of going out. It's time. I got to do this for real. I will go out and talk to hot women and people every day for the next thirty days, while still sticking to my now happily implemented work schedule. I will go out Friday and Saturday for the night. And the other days I will either do day game or hop to some bar for and hour or so. Today is already day four done.
For those interested this is where I’m at right now: I’m 28 and just finishing my master in philosophy. I have always been an extroverted, playful and positive guy. I’m also fairly confident. And I’m already doing okay’ish with women. Been with about fifty so far, some real cuties. But I’m nowhere near consistent. I have had this moments where stuff just clicks and everything feels just right. But its been here and there. I want this to be the status quo, as far as this is possible. I want to see how far I can take this. And also something has always been missing. I know now that I have always been more talk then walk, mostly due to not living up to my own standards, and actually (in hindsight) using ( or trying to 'use' ) women to compensate for my lack of going for what I want in other areas of my life ('use' here is supposed to mean to prove myself by being desirable for women, lol this sounds way worse then it was actually). And while I have had a lot of really beautiful experiences this is not exactly a receipt for success and inner peace. I have already come a long way on my journey to self-mastery, to aligning myself with my own values in the last two years. I have started meditation two and half years ago. I have overcome my resistances regarding writing and for the first time in my life I’m actually really studying and putting myself to what I want.Getting the results, too. Furthermore I have begun to always finish the stuff that I started. And to not start stuff I can’t finish. I stopped drinking and smoking (everything) for good. I do cross fit three times a week. I have not only started to sing and write MY OWN songs and poetry, but also perform them publicly this year. Especially this has been a biggie for me, because I always felt I couldn’t. Ha! I have also been lucky as I have had very a weird kind of sickness for the last eight or nine years (getting fever every two to three weeks for a couples of days). This winter I finally found some capable doctors and it turned out to be fairly similar to some other fever syndrome that. Now I get some medics and I’m fine. Incredible. Yet especially this year I have been going out only very little, because I have been so focused on getting on my path in other areas of my life. So I'm anything but swimming pussy right now. Nontheless, now I can honestly say that I have never felt so good about myself. I have been taking care of a lot of shit that weighted me down. Time to put my self on my path with women, too, time to master myself in all areas around the fairer sex, and socially in general.So I feel stuff, will be differently now. What I want: I just want to feel completely comfortable of expressing myself around the hottest women. To become the kind of self that effortlessly attracts exceptional people of all kinds into my life, to challenge, push and inspire me to be my best day and day again and do the same for them. In the long-term I see my self with a beautiful, playful, self-empowered and bi-sexual girlfriend that enjoys picking up girls and prolonged surf-trips with me. haha Most important things that I want to learn in the 30 days: - to make going out to pick up girls the most fun part of my day - to consistently implement Tyler’s six rules. - to develop an abundance mindset - to always go for the hottest girls in the venue. - to uncover and get rid of lots of other shitty mindsets I still have in this regard I will continue to write certain insights, questions that arise and some fieldreports in this thread. But as time is rare, I’ll try to keep it short ;) Any questions, observations, rants and comments are very welcome!
For those interested this is where I’m at right now:
I’m 28 and just finishing my master in philosophy.
I have always been an extroverted, playful and positive guy. I’m also fairly confident. And I’m already doing okay’ish with women. Been with about fifty so far, some real cuties. But I’m nowhere near consistent. I have had this moments where stuff just clicks and everything feels just right. But its been here and there. I want this to be the status quo, as far as this is possible. I want to see how far I can take this.
And also something has always been missing. I know now that I have always been more talk then walk, mostly due to not living up to my own standards, and actually (in hindsight) using ( or trying to 'use' ) women to compensate for my lack of going for what I want in other areas of my life ('use' here is supposed to mean to prove myself by being desirable for women, lol this sounds way worse then it was actually). And while I have had a lot of really beautiful experiences this is not exactly a receipt for success and inner peace.
I have already come a long way on my journey to self-mastery, to aligning myself with my own values in the last two years. I have started meditation two and half years ago. I have overcome my resistances regarding writing and for the first time in my life I’m actually really studying and putting myself to what I want.Getting the results, too. Furthermore I have begun to always finish the stuff that I started. And to not start stuff I can’t finish. I stopped drinking and smoking (everything) for good. I do cross fit three times a week. I have not only started to sing and write MY OWN songs and poetry, but also perform them publicly this year. Especially this has been a biggie for me, because I always felt I couldn’t. Ha!
I have also been lucky as I have had very a weird kind of sickness for the last eight or nine years (getting fever every two to three weeks for a couples of days). This winter I finally found some capable doctors and it turned out to be fairly similar to some other fever syndrome that. Now I get some medics and I’m fine. Incredible.
Yet especially this year I have been going out only very little, because I have been so focused on getting on my path in other areas of my life. So I'm anything but swimming pussy right now.
Nontheless, now I can honestly say that I have never felt so good about myself. I have been taking care of a lot of shit that weighted me down. Time to put my self on my path with women, too, time to master myself in all areas around the fairer sex, and socially in general.So I feel stuff, will be differently now.
What I want: I just want to feel completely comfortable of expressing myself around the hottest women. To become the kind of self that effortlessly attracts exceptional people of all kinds into my life, to challenge, push and inspire me to be my best day and day again and do the same for them.
In the long-term I see my self with a beautiful, playful, self-empowered and bi-sexual girlfriend that enjoys picking up girls and prolonged surf-trips with me. haha
Most important things that I want to learn in the 30 days:
- to make going out to pick up girls the most fun part of my day
- to consistently implement Tyler’s six rules.
- to develop an abundance mindset
- to always go for the hottest girls in the venue.
- to uncover and get rid of lots of other shitty mindsets I still have in this regard
I will continue to write certain insights, questions that arise and some fieldreports in this thread. But as time is rare, I’ll try to keep it short ;)
Any questions, observations, rants and comments are very welcome!
So friday had been is the last day of my thirty-day challenge.
How did it go? Good and bad.
On the good side:
I did uncover a lot of shitty mind sets I have lol:
Most importantly made me realize I got way more work to do than I thought. In effect, there was some part that still believed this was going to be a piece of cake for me, if just started. I was wrong. It’s going to be tough, but also lots of fun.
I have lots of petty ego shit to get rid off, if I want to become as loose I want to be. I still give way to many fucks. But I will fucking learn this!
I also had a shit ton of fun. Any night I went out to a real club and stayed till the end, even if alone I had a shit ton of fun, and felt the most relaxed and grounded possible at the end of the night. Even if I started out really shitty.
Tons of chicks dig me (only I’m in expert in fucking it up, gotta give myself that much credit at least or worse just not making it happen).
I pushed way more in certain instances than I ever have. Stayed longer in set. Tried to meditate though the awkwardness Pottedflowers style.
Tried to steal girls away from dudes. With varying success. lol
Fought for some real hotties against other players.
Re-approached some girls up to four times.
Managed to go into sets while being really congruent with a suboptimal state. Certainly far from always, and I also lose tbe congruence. But this is something I want to focus on.
I went out many of times alone.. and had fucking blast.
On the bad side:
On the bad side I fucked up three days of the whole 30 days. Which is 10 per cent. Way too much. Fuckup here, means I did cold approach less than three cuties that day, which I had decided to be my minimum per day.
I can’t say I reached many of my goals above:
Did I consistently implement Tylers six rules? Nope. Only sporadically. And only to a certain point. But further than ever.
Also I got off of my good working habits a slightly, due to being under-slept and pussying out while pimping.
My biggest actionable sticking points are
not approaching right from the start and everyone
- note: first approach is the hardest.
- Getting lazy, i.e. taking bigger breaks between talking to new people or taking action -> becoming a value leech losing momentum
Indecisiveness: this one is a biggie for me. -> I stop to lead.
- Especially if the girl is do-able but not really hot or at least cute. I tend to think then “well maybe, if she makes the moves”.
- Note to self: They are all pink inside!
- I’ll self-sabotage by not moving things forward accordingly, it’s like trying to get the girl unattracted to me. Instead of just playing with the energy and making everyone win-> girl’s get confused, and stops ‘liking’ me. And I feel shitty, because I was a pussy for not making the moves or not walking away right away.
- Second note to self: they may be all pink inside, but don’t waste time on sub par girls. Fuck her or not, but stick with the plan. Indecisiveness feels the worst!
A year ago I would have fucked couple of the girls, I didn’t fuck the last month(s), because I think I’m above it now. This is shitty for two reasons. Not having sex right now makes me needy right now.
But there is something else here, some bigger issue here, and I have yet trouble to really articulate it. So this deserves some more thought still. But what I know is this:
I feel bad for dumping (or potentially having to dump) people that just might not live up to my expectations.
This is why I won’t talk to fatties many times, unless when I am in state. This also why I will not approach girls in front of other girls I was just with.
There are probably a couple of different issues here. I think it’s got to do with not wanting to disappoint people on the one hand. Self Image.
And with projecting things into people which at that point I can’t really know. I don’t always do this, but it slide into it. Need to find out what triggers it.
This last paragraph is not really thought out. I'm missing stuff here. maybe its really because I'm uncongruent from the start and set some wrong expectations. This will sort itself out.
There is tons of more stuff. But I just wanted to get this out. I didn’t get laid from this challenge. That’s okay. I’m pretty content with myself anyway. It did give me some momentum. And it also shows how much good it does me in terms of emotional health just to make an effort to be social everyday. Getting a nice little rotation going again with girls I really dig is probably the only thing that will top this.
I already do a lot of stuff differently. I will keep going out in a more sustainable from now. Next steps from here are:
- go out on two times full throttle at night plus two times day game.. Frees time for dates and working through some stuff. Also approach first cute I see everyday.
- Actually start writing field reports. Just writing this down here, has immense effects clears a lot of stuff up and makes it actionable.
- Find a cool wing. Been going out either alone or with non-community friends. But someone that really pushes it himself would be great.
- get my working schedule back dialled in. Shit makes me happy.
- Get diet in check. I want a real sixpack for once.
So I'm gonna make this my fieldreport thread.
Bad Taste Party 16.07:
Day has been relatively shitty, because I overslept hard and subsequently didn’t do my meditation, morning routine. Also I didn’t get much work done the rest of the day apart from writing a mail to one of my profs who said ‘he would be my personal trainer for my thesis’.
Met up with a guy from rsd inner circle in vienna, who didn’t seem a completely weirdo from fb profile to do some daygame. Did like ten approaches in somewhat more of an hour. Nothing really stuck. Nor was I really convinced by any of the girls.
But anyway made a connection with the dude, who is still pretty young like 21 or so, but very chill and lots of potential. Went to cross fit then, and we decided to meet up latter at rather large ‘bad taste’ pool - party.
Met up with another buddy of mine and we dress up. I wear a turquese green slim trunk short, my red bathrobe, and a blue’ish dress scarf around my neck. Topped of with fucked up straw Stetson that has already seen far too many parties and some cheap shades I stole somewhere. Lets say I was pretty much in line with the theme.
My buddy looked like done up Sindbad without a carpet, but that’s pretty much his usual hippie style. We had head to party very early at around ten in order to still get in without standing in line for hours.
Turns out to be way to early. My new buddy turned up with his roommate who is decently cute. He looked actually pretty fly in a Russel Brandesque way, with her shirt and her necklace on.
It’s still totally calm, and we rock out for a ten minutes on the dance floor pretty wildly. Apart from two other freaky guys nobody joins. Chill back to the pool, where everyone was just sitting. I’m feel tired as hell and already muscle from training. Talk to some girls, some guys but its going nowhere.
Take some pictures. But the mood doesn’t really come up yet. Conversation is dry. Apart from the room mate, who was quite interested in me all the time. But I didn’t want to do her. I think my hippie buddy fucked her later, but I haven’t heard the news just yet.
We were always heading back to the dancer, and 12:30 the party slowly starts rolling. People finally joining and the whole atmosphere becomes a lot more loose.
I had one instant make out, with a petite little cutie, who ignored me before. I grabbed lifted her up in the maelstrom of people, and let her ride on my leg for a bit. But her friends dragged her way never to be seen again. Ton’s of rejections due to being weak in the approach. Some of them I turned around later. Some decent interactions. Nothing really cool.
I didn’t feel really grounded the whole night. I think this one key element that I’m missing often. One girl in the last set even commented on that, asking whether I was hyperactive or on drugs. Further more people often come up to me asking for drugs. And I’m usually the only completely sober person around. So whenever I go into a set and I’m completely unresisting to my current state (feeling chodish, or low energy, or whats) that’s when I’m at my best. When I do that I do less, and I hear that I’m cool and hot etc.
I think yesterday it was worse for a combination of not having been in my rhythm the whole day, not having meditated and wearing like a crazy outfit, putting some extra expectations on myself that I had to be more like crazy all the time to live up to the costume persona.
Yet this whole hyperactive, talking too fast, always being a step ahead already - thing is pretty much rooted in my personality from my youth. I know that because it has been commented on forever to me. And I never really got it. Why?
because I feel (kind of) chill, I feel good. And I feel I’m creating good energy. Which I do. So I always felt always being punished for doing something good. It never made sense to me.
Now I think one of the reasons, I always had such a hard time wrapping my head around this, and taking these comments as an well meant hints to become a better self, is because it is creating an illusion of being in the now for me. Or maybe better, it does get me out of my head, and it does also create some good energy, but it is missing the roots, the control part if you so want. So I think that’s the reason, why to some people actually sense there is something off here. And they are right. Haha.
Does anybody resonate with this last part?
I think the solution is to just become more present in my day-to-day life. Do things to consciously slow done. Meditate before I go out. Make an effort to talk slow. I think I need to remind myself to ground myself every time before I communicate. But I appreciate any pointers here.
Other notes: best interactions I always have, when I directly ping of another girl, when I made moves. Always. I need to get fucking six steps implemented.
28th of July.
Last week till today.
So I’m not getting this right. I need to write my Fieldreports immediately. At best right after coming home or right the next day. I will do this from now on. My post here will be become probably even more unorganized then they are yet. But it doesn’t matter. I need to get this out and fix some thoughts. However incoherent they may be at first. But I have the hope that by actually making an effort to ‘spit’ my thoughts out here as fast as possible come time they become more coherent anyway.
I have had couple of things I had wanted to post up here, and I didn’t do in the end, because I was procrastinating on the my fr.
Anyway, cool shit I did:
- finally changed up my diet: I’m doing slow carb Tim Ferriss style now, combined with intermittent fasting. Makes me feel overall very good, not overfed. But satisfied.
Lentils, mixed veggies, spinacci, eggs, cottage cheese and escalope of pig, is all I eat the whole day. Sound really worse than it is. I cook the lentils with hacked tomatoes onions, chilli, ail and some marsala. Always cook the lentils for two days. I started to really like my veggies, too. I eat like half a bag of spinacci, and a third of mixed veggies a day.
I snack a little bit of 85 percent dark chocolate. It’s an average of 1900 to 2000 kcl per day. Sixpack here we go.
Sat. is cheat, according to Tim Ferriss I can go out all there no probs. Will give him the benefit of the doubt now.
Stupid up shit I did:
- I’m not as tight on my work again yet. I’m writing my thesis. And right now I’m really having a hard time figuring some stuff out. And so I repeatedly I find myself stalking this lovely forum, or my Facebook which I recently activated, to evade the struggle. That’s fucked up I got change that back ASAP. No play until scheduled effort is done!!
Game-wise. I had quiete a lot of minor and bigger realizations.Without like big changes in my game, though I feel I'm moving forward.
Most important ones I do actually remember:
- I’m pretty damn good staying in my comfort zone. Lol. Especially if the first set of the day went really well. fuck this.
- Meditating 15 minutes directly before I get out makes a big difference. I usually meditate in the morning. Now I try to add that directly before I go out.
- I use dancing to procrastinate from approaching.
- I don’t stay in set enough
- And why the heck do I not befriend the cool guys?
- I’m slowly getting a feel for what it means to never go rapport. So basically I can flirt and tease etc. and make the girl comfy all the while by relating to the girl. Been doings whenever I anyway. But I started to realize subtle changes that happen when I break out of it.
- My texting sucks most, where I try to ‘logically compensate for non-existing solid one on one interactions. If I don’t stress about it, possibilities to poke fun out of the girl and use the bossy frames I found here arise quite naturally and lots of it -> albeit my texting isn’t like technically very good, where I fuck it up its usually an inner game issue. Well some times plain dumbness, too. Lol
- also don't fucking text to compensate for action not dones. Backfires hard!
- I’m playing it safe way too often. LOL I’m really a sucker for getting some cheap validation.
Yesterday I had really interesting interaction. During this one little the interaction I went several times from supercool guy to super chodey Chris and back, Girl was confused as hell. Haha. I kind of persisted by owning my chodiness. Statements of empathy. And it got better in the end.
I molested her for like 5 to ten minutes. And in the end when I finally started to relax into myself ground myself for real she went. Got her number. But Damn, I think if I could have just 15 minutes more time with and one move of location I’d be owning that ass right now. But she wasn’t having it. Girl was beautiful. Could be on X-Art any day. Got some texting going. See where it goes. But I kept the pattern alive I’d say, flickering between cool ass guy, and confusing chump.
If I can save the convo, I’ll make it thread :D
Also had some really curious happenings with a little stewardess I fucked last week. But those also deserve a thread on its own.
Met up with wing man from above at about 22:30 near an inner city theatre, where there is the daily aftershow party of a dance festival taking place. I don’t want to go, because I’m deadly tired and I’m sore in places I didn’t know I could be sore. I go anyway. Did a bit of meditation beforehand then talk to random girls in the sub and on the way. Just friendly chit chat, then talk to one cutie, whose boyfriends happens to stand right next to her, I keep a chatting to her. She is weirded out or acts so, when she gets to her train. I don’t care. Flirt with random fatties on the way.
By the time I get there I feel good and relaxed. Meet my wing. We head in rock out to a curious version of ‘get together’ on an empty dance-floor. Talk to cute girl waiting for a drink at the bar.
I compliment her weirdly, just saying the first thing on my mind: Like a I have seen you from behind and liked what I saw, and so I had to see you from the front, and I still like what I see. I don’t really own it. Partly too, because midway in saying it hit me that she isn#t that cute..
I try to own weirdness of the moment. Keep chatting doesn’t really work. If I had found her cute afterall I had probably tried and could made it work out later on. But I didn’t want.
Two other guys from the community are there. They are nice guys. More or less just standing and looking. We chat. A bit here and there.
Later I really bonded with my wing. I do really like him. He is fun and positive and he’s got the fire. Knows how to really let go on the dance-floor. He’s into writing and doing poetry slams. Which I like to. And he approaches. Not very much but it will come. Also we will get the whole winging dynamics pretty soon, I think we could set this town on fire.
Tons of more girls and people I talk to. Only one stuck out though. A very cute blonde girl with a her shy friend. I had some pretty good dynamics with and then it turned all to shit. Not exactly sure why. But I lost my footing.
Talk to the shy one first, then to the friend, I’m very physical with her right of the bat. Move back and introduce one of the community guys to the set, then command them all to the dance floor. Music is at all night low point. It’s like they want to scare people away. I like my girl, she’s feisty, and sexy move with her hair. I tell her so. Music gets a little better. And we dance. But try to spread my attention around a bit to the other guys.
Two big mistakes I made I think now. First I failed to introduce a solid ‘we dynamic’ to the interaction. And second I should have led them/or her away from the dance floor, before they left. Built a solid connection, and establishing the leading frame more.
So the girls left; and we just rocked to some pretty cool soul music. Enticing the people all around to dance. And it works, well.
I didn’t care much about the girls leaving, because I thought her hooked anyway.
Indeed I find them twenty minutes later smoking outside. But Blondie is giving me very little. And I probably reacted in subtle ways. I tell them about how I like Aristocats, and relate myself to Thomas O’Malley, and get really animated. The girls like it. But then suddenly the blond starts acting like really drunk and vulgar, and I get caught into it. The dynamics were more like a dynamics me against her, because I teased at the beginning for where she was from. And I didn’t manage to bring it around. The girl’s leave. Maybe they were really drunk. Not sure.
Another set on the dance floor. I should have just escalated way more. I don’t escalate enough. Lol. Albeit its so much fun. But that’s what really brings out my sexual, cool self.
Chris what do you do to get in a more social mood/mode beforehand?
Chris what do you do to get in a more social mood/mode beforehand?
before 1) going out or before 2.) texting girls?
1.) I do meditate for like ten 15 min., and if I have the time I play guitar, sing and improvise my ass of, preferably with friends and roomies. Otherwise talk/joke with roomies, if they are available,
mostly just talking to random people on the way to the club (ideally) like yesterday.
2.) nothing really. Though it came to mind I should. ABT Always Be Texting. but on the otherhand texting is distracting, as is is posting here. Ha! Gotta get back to work ASAP.
Did you notice any pattern above?
One reason why I so often will actually operate from an inauthentic try hard place when talking to hot girls or People of high value to me is probably, because I over identify with my charming witty self. Which by the way is amazing, but it doesn’t last. And its pretty dumb to over identify with ones peak self.
As if normal was good enough.
I should try to be boring instead. Lol, No the most important behaviour I could train myself right now, would be probably to always quickly ground myself before any communicative action in the field. Just take a deep breath, check stance, and slooooooow the fuck down. No need, to be quick and funny at all!!
Same venue. Rains pouring like hell. Turns out to be a good thing as everyone is actually inside and dancing already at 11pm. Instead of just chilling outside.
Talked to cougar at metro destination. Turns out she is into bodybuilding. She is not that hot. Though I’d bang her!! She gives me like very little. One word answers only . Always looks away. But I just stay, breath and let the tension build, until she keeps asking what I want. I can see her getting turned on though. I just keep the tension on her. She runs off to catch her train. But I feel good.
This powerful stuff. Creepyness beats charming twice a day:D
Flirt with some hotties girls sitting in a bar over the fence, standing under my umbrella in the rain. Turns out they are from my cross fit studio and know me. That’s why they smiled at me. I don’t who they are, but accept that burden happily, invite them over to bar I’m heading to. As I walk away I here one of them say: That guy is super!
Yes girl you got it.
Meet up with wing. Do some crazy shit on the dance-floor, teaching random people ‘to let go’, by shouting ‘ Its allowed to dance’ ‘it is allowed to crazy” picking girls up and hurling them around. Although everyone already dancing. Haha. Fun times.
There is a Swedish Guy with his girl friend, they dance amazingly. Later I befriend the guy. Turns out he is professional dancer ‘contemporary dance’ here doing the workshops. and they were just rocking out. The two had an amazing energy. its really cool to dance with someone, who is really engaged in their moving what they do without being totally lost to himself. Flowing effortlessly but not redrawn from the world. Its like a jam session with movements and energy. Very addictive.
Anyway talked to a lot of different girls. And made an effort to stay in set longer. Which worked well. Only one girl I was really into after talking to her, though. 19 year old bi-sexual singer, we grabbed some food for her outside, and talked for like half an hour.
Her friends left us alone. Etc. I was pretty touchy and chill, but she wouldn’t have much physicality from me. Less give me some back. Also in dancing push my hands away.
In hindsight, I think maybe I let the conversation get too ‘conversational’ at times. I could have put her on tension waaaay more. See above cougar. Though maybe she just wasn’t into me. I took her phone number anyway. Will see.
Seriously considered banging some fatty that hit on me hard in the end. Big tits, cute face classy dress, and too much brains for her own good. Yet I had to go to pee, and when I came back she was nowhere to be seen. Too bad, fatty, you could have had my semen in you.
Definitely going to be tuning in for this and keeping up.
Will be starting my own challenge soon.
Good luck, as long as you're having fun, you're killing it and growing.
Definitely going to be tuning in for this and keeping up.
Will be starting my own challenge soon.
Good luck, as long as you're having fun, you're killing it and growing.
Nice, man, that'd be cool! Go for it.
I'm really curious to see where I can take this. I'm just slowly realizing where I actually am. lol
so yesterday I fucked shit up royally.
approximately like this:
yeah, that bad. Hated myself the whole morning. That's pretty incredible rare for me.
I had a date with very cute croatian lady.
Knew her from about year ago, where we went on a date, it/she got really weird, and I wasn't really interested anymore. Nontheless had her and her sister over for a drinking session. And she got even worse. so I never saw her again, till a couple of weeks ago. Surprisingly that girl has changed to the better a lot. Stopped drinking and smoking. started a fashion blog, basically got her shit together. And looks even better for what its worth.
We hung out so I could 'beat her ass in Tekken'. My texting was kind of solid for once. short texts. some solid, push and pull, some relating some sexual stuff. Nothing elite. but okay, especially for me.
She comes over, we talk play a little, she hits all of the buttons like crazy. even kicks my ass a couple of times. lol its cool.
And then we watch 'tucker and dale vs evil' on my bed, laugh our asses off... And I don't really escalate!! 'till after the movie. I Mean we touched, held hand a bit, too had in arm, too. Girl digs me.
But after the movie, she wants to go home.
I mean this actually where it really threw me off of my game. I think. She even said something along the lines of 'She had to go before something happens'. At that moment I was ecalating, though. Saying I had to tie her into knot.
Thing is, suddenly I got reactive. And it got weird. lol Not sure yet how much harm was done. I kissed her at door, when she went hugged me. But it was me kissing her not us kissing. And she was 'whoops'.
croatian girls, mang. She was expecting me to make the moves. I'm also sad for her, too. haha
Well, couple of reasons why this happened in my analysis.
-First. I didn't talk up girls during my day. Although there would have a couple of cuties. just content with meeting the girls. Also a little bit pissed for burocracies dealings.
-second not escalating steadily.
-and then watching a movie, which I never do usually. Should have just chatted, listened to music, and kept escalating and fucked her as usually. could have still watched a movie then-> this why it was kind abrupt and jumpy at the end as I suddenly had a time constraint. And I could have known it beforehand, too.
- Also I could and should probably just change my mind, and go with it. (regarding the video thing) I'm too hung up on doing 'staying congruent' to what I said. Also applies to in the field. I'm surprised to realize how inflexible I am. Can't be too hard. Just change mind and be congruent with that instead. 'Slap self'
- Most telling however was how much it got me reactive when she said she wanted to go. Usually I would have been. Okay, no biggie. Did the same this time, only that I lied. lol. Because I knew I hadn't made the moves. Dumb dumb.
Had a fucking great night, although no make-out, no pull, and just one number, but a good. But lots of really cool reference experiences and I managed to implement a couple of things I previously noted.
- had one cool set going for almost all the night, lots of leading, venue changes.
- sneaked into expensive night club for free with eyeliner stamps
- collected a crazy amount of blow outs
- told a hottie ‘ she is fucked up’, for giving me the ‘EEEW’ face like three times in row. Which in all honesty was fucked up by me and I regret it, although she earned it. But I came really from the wrong place doing it. Not sure, how she got such heavy reaction out of me. Normally I just shrug or love, and it doesn’t happen really often either. Anyway, never done this before, nor will I again, hopefully. If I see again, I might even apologize, though she probably won’t appreciate it, and it might even send then wrong signal. But this wouldn’t be about her anyway. I can’t excuse my insecurities with hers that would be just fucked up. And I know it hit her hard.
- Funny enough right two minutes later I met super a hot architect, who gave me a boner just by standing next to me. She seemed very into me, but then just vanished. Just turned talk to her friends and then suddenly they all vanished. Poof. Should have led more her away beforehand. I wait too long because of insecurity of whether I’ll get compliance. Fuck this.
- End up in third venue of dance festival again. My girl doesn’t want to go home with me, though we have great vibe, lots of touching no kissing. Take her number, she leaves suddenly with saying goodbye. Her friends are bit estranged, too. Later she writes and apologizes.
- I stay in the last venue. And I’m in state again. It just like I#m at peace. No need to do anything. People smiling, girls approaching me. Though only fatties. Haha,
- Also had couple of ‘fights’ with other guys about girls over the night. Once they tooled me by prying my girl away by taking a selfie with her, turning her away with three guys and then immediately involving her in an even bigger group of people. Lol clever bastards. Next time I’m gonna get my ass on that selfie, too. These were her friends. the girl liked me, but was not yet hooked. But they already blocked me out the first time after I hand of goded her out of the group. Maybe she had a boyfriend for whom they were protecting her. Maybe I was a little too confrontational with group at the first approach. Probs both. Not clear in hindsight.
Another guy from the last venue was really interesting: He and it his little buddy (who wasn’t much of threat actually) were already trying make moves on the girls we had brought to the venue. And in the in end he stole my girl (antohter one). Well somehow at least. He had very strange kind of game. At first I thought he was gay, and trying to prevent his target (his friend actually) from hitting up one of our girls. He had strong presence, but at same time was like lost and overly drunk child. I’m not sure whether he was really so drunk, or it was kind of shtick. He was running around talking to randoms, commanding attention, blubbering something incoherent, and then immediately saying that no, no, and turning away, only to turn in again, change his mind, run off. Come back half falling later. Sounds like very good bad game. Lol It was fascinating and weird. He would stand in front of my girl, which was my last approach and also the last fuckable girl in the venue, announce ‘that now he would really go’ like one hundred times, while she was talking to her friend.
In the end I’m standing outside with girl, and I had made it ridiculous obvious that I wanted to fuck her. Not really the smoothest way to go about it. Sure, but I was absolutely sure I had in the sack. She told me no a couple of times. Then that guy came in again. Wanting to say something, but then not, etc. etc. and I realize they know each other. We urge him to tell us. I tell him to let it all out. Haha. And he then say that "I have to leave!" I laugh in his face. Lol. I’m like ‘nah, man, you gotta explain that.’ And the girl is like “Yeah, tell us!” And he’s like: You leave and she kisses me. That’s it!” I have to laugh again, just take the girl and backturn him. ‘lets go’ as if her objections hadn’t existed. He is getting pissed. Now the little guy comes in holds me back. The big dude pushes him and is ‘like no, no, don’t touch him’
And then girl goes like . ‘no, no no, I have to explain.’ And then sends guys away.
Its kind of curious turn of events.: What she explains me then is in short that I’m hot, and she digs me. But I’m not her type at all, though the other guys. And that she can’t shake of conditioning, although she knows that I’m probably going to fuck her better. And that guy doesn’t even want to fuck her probs, anyway.
Long story short, whatever was true about what she told me, I was just like ‘okay, you are big girl’. And left. Eventually could have tried a couple of more angles. But no. I honestly felt it was her problem: At least I wasn’t reactive or anything. Like I did my best in relation to my current skillset, and my inner state was solid. Thus I went home feeling great.
My feeling was they knew each other already, and they guy had some kind of emotional hold on her. Probably made out with her and ditched or something got her ego hooked. Whatever.
nothing spectacular happened. But I was flowing pretty well.
-hit uber two Uber-bitches in the metro. They ignore me (not commanding enough,) just kept talking, 'we are talking!!' 'I'm talking to you!' they walk away, joke around with random guy, who looks confused but smiles. I think he doesn't even speak my language, probably I'm disrespectful creep. He's right. haha
- My wing's late. I chat with very young girl and her two friends. just killing time. funny. not wanting anything.
-try to ditch the line at the entry. no go, then get into right at the third place by flirign with two cuties, (okayish cuties) but they are feisty. flirt flirt, flirt, get in, get a gum, see you later
-flirt with a mature redhead immediately, and I'm getting into the zone. Her fatty friend's mouth is just wide open.
- get in dance, a bit and then I lose it a bit.
- wing is all about, macking on chicks.
- cute half bolivian chick is giving me the eyes and I hand of god her to me. We start dancing and she dances really good and crazy. we go wild. We are not on the dancefloor but on the corridor., but go wild. then people all over join over hell breaks lose. Corriodors now dance floor. (tried to pull her later, althouh she wasn't really my type, but the dancing skills made her mad hot, and she was meditator, too.
- redhad mature runs into me outside. We make out. tell her she's the kind of woman my momma used to warn me about. She just laughs, I push her away, just playing.
- meet very pretty cuban doctor, with looooooong legs out side. She's on euro tour and I make her laugh so hard. Her boyfirend comes later is getting little clingy. We take pics. I just move on.
- had some lows, too but always meet up with my wing. Cheering me up.
- People think I'm a dancer lol
- Late in the night. I meet two of the hottest, or at least highest status seeming girls all around in the venue. They are dressed to the tops, but little make up. They both work in fashion PR lol. Anyway I'm just chill and funny with them. Not doing anything special, they seem to have taken a liking to me, because of how I danced. We chat, lose and meet each other a couple of times. They go to another club later. They want me to come along but I'm tired. I take the younger ones number.
- one thing I noticed about this girls is that, whenever I talked to them and then I got interrupted, which happened a couple of times, they would immediately be focused on something else, no time delay, sometimes they were just gone. So probs my impression wasn't that strong, as I was just chill, BUT I found this an interesting trait. One I want to cultivate myself, too. It was so instantly. lol. Like they telling you something about their life,'I'm like wait a second' and when I turned back, they are already doing something else.
Stuff to make better:
One thing I need to learn to seed the pull better. lol, gotta find me a couple infos on that.
And still try to implement Tyler's rules better. I understand why he so insistent on minimizing time between interactions. Its sooo powerful.