How to turn this one around? post-coital DRAMA texting
I met this chick at a club. 26 yr old TIGHT body..even after two kids
we hooked up on the date and then she started going cold for a few weeks. until I threw in some emotional spikes
Me: Hey wifey get home safe - Dj Mark
Girl: Let's hope my sister is a good driver then
Me: She's a good cockblock at least ;)
Girl: When you talk so sexy to me I think you are your own cock block
Girl: I miss you already :)
Me: Same here
Me: Wish you were here...I need protection from these club sluts
Girl: Did you survive the ladies?
Me: I could use a tylenol the size of a hockey puck
Girl: Wow I thought you were drinking water all night
Me: I was. Until the after party...
Me: Just bought a 60 round nerf gun
Me: Feel so Rambo right now
Girl: What exactly do you plan on doing with a 60 round nerf gun lol
Me: Raining terror on my roommates
Me: How was yer day punkinbutt?
Girl: Just another typical day in the life of DJ mark?
Girl: Punkinbutt? My day was full of crazy people at work. And now I'm relaxing :)
Me: You should be relaxing here...just made us a piña colada
Me: And the kids have gone to sleep
Girl: I don't think you understand that I wasn't kidding when I said I was a single mom of two kids
Me: Nope. Understood. Oh and you're a sexy kisser
Girl: Yeah I'm pretty talented...I like how much you make me smile
Me: Are you and your smile free for a drink this week?
Girl: Maybe...when were you thinking
Me: What's your schedule like
Girl: Well I'm off on Thursday and I'm off this weekend
Me: Thursday works. 8 good for you?
Girl: Yes but first I think it's fair that I get to play 20 questions so I actually know who I'm getting a drink with. You ready?
Me: Sure why not..
Girl: Ok first you told me you are an engineer. Is that actually true?
Me: Yes
Girl: Where did you go to school
Me: Massachusetts Institute of Technology
Girl: Ok if you could only listen to one song for the rest of your life, what would it be
Me: This one
Girl: Idiot
Me: Hmm so you mean that didn't blow your panties away
Girl: I don't wear panties
Me: That's hot. Stop it i'm at work..
Girl: So where are you taking me for drinks?
Me: Let's meet up Thurs @8
Girl: Got that, I was asking where
Me: I thought you said you lived in folsom...is this where you cut up the bodies
Me: I have two places i told you
Girl: One for the wife and kids and one for the girlfriend?
Me: Yes. Can you imagine if my wife discovered our sexual affair
Girl: On a serious note I'm not coming to your house. I'm not a "club slut"
Me: You're just parking there punkinbutt. We're walking to Firestone
Me: I don't really trust you in my house yet...what if you try to stab me
Girl: As long as you don't give me a reason to
Girl: Still on for tomorrow?
Me: Yes
Me: How's your day gorgeous? Feels like mine's never going to end..!
Girl: Ready for work to be over. Why, what's wrong?
Me: Meetings all day. I need you here to distract me
Girl: Do I need to be there to distract you?
Me: Depends what kind of sexy outfit you wearing
Girl: Well how much do you like red and khaki
Girl: Damn girl I'm trying to concentrate at work but I'm remembering what your lips tasted like..
Me: Hey feel free to dress cute tonight. So we match
Girl: Wow....
Girl: This work? sends dorky outfit
Me: Yes. Nerdalicious
Girl: Perfect, glad we are on the same page
Me: You can park in front of grocery outlet. See you @8
Me: Yo I'm running a few mins late
Girl: Ok when will you be home?
Me: 815
Girl: K
Girl: Are you home
Me: Ran across the street for a sec (to grab condoms hah)
Girl: Ok well I'm here
Me: Please don't hate me. (Wild fuck session..then she stormed out crying after lol)
Me: p.s. I'm enjoying your untouched Amy's...
Girl: I don't hate you
Me: How's your day rockstar? I miss your face..
Girl: It's amazing, the usual :)
Me: I'm guessing you didn't have to pepper spray any old ladies today
Girl: Only before the store opened
Me: Dork lol what time you off work? We're watching a movie tonight
Girl: We are?
Me: Depends. Wanna hang?
Girl: I can't I already promised my son we would have a movie night together
Me: No worries. You free tmrw? We'll hit up Zocalo
Me: Just dominated two 60 year old men at racket ball. Mark's self esteem = All time high :)
Me: What does Miley Cyrus have for Thanksgiving?
Me: TWERKY. Happy Thanksgiving :)
Me: Is it 5 o'clock yet?! Work is for the birds.. I've decided to just marry a rich girl
Me: Hey slut can I tell you something?
Girl: That hurts
Me: I'm going to be blunt here. You were easy, no challenge at all. HUGE turn off - probly why I couldn't finish. We could've had love... But now your life will just be a trail of used condoms and abortions. Kill yourself (wanted to experiment here LOL)
Girl: Really? This is how you react? I was scared and needed time. Glad I won't waste any more time on you
Me: I really enjoyed you and though we connected. But I'm tired of your bullshit games. Yeah you should find some other poor sap to tool
Girl: I've been hurt too much, I'm obviously not ready to date. Sorry for any pain I caused
Me: I was ready to give you time. Guess I get stabbed when I trust someone too easily. I'm never opening up again (stolen from Julien haha)
..What's a good way to re-engage this situation without seeming too needy?
Maybe i'm missing something...but why in the hell would you tell her to kill herself? How is that ever effective game?
Everything else was flawless
ya i remember feeling legitamitely pissed at this girl. She was throwing away all this chemistry wih no discussions lol heat of the moment type shit
ya i remember feeling legitamitely pissed at this girl. She was throwing away all this chemistry wih no discussions lol heat of the moment type shit
Is that something Julien says? I definitely have heard it before, and I have a feeling it wasn't meant for situations in which you were actually mad lol
you shoulda.. and still should calll this girl up and settle it. Leave a voicemail if you can
LOL
your jeffy, jeffy, jjulien thing doesn't seem like it worked.
Has it ever crossed your mind that she actually is just a nice single mom, that has been fucked over? Not exactly the kind of girl I would be sending THOSE texts to. There's a time and a place for that. Usually with a girl that craves emotional attention and is a "club slut".
what went down during sex? With no details we have nothing to go off here.
What. The fuck. Was THAT?!
Lemme get this straight... You were fucking her. Didn't cum. She felt hurt that you didn't and stormed off. Because she was already wondering whether you were just using her. It makes her think she's not sexy enough for you AND THEN YOU CALL HER A SLUT. Tell her she's easy. Her life will be a trail of used condoms and abortions and she should kill herself...
You're never gonna see her again. Maybe it wasn't 100% intentional but she weeded you OUT.
From the comments I can tell I really don't want to read this convo lol
I go in and I'm crisp, clean and my vocals are fucking coming out like music. - Anonymous MW student
- Autismus Terminus Finis (Root Cause/Cure of Autism Epidemic)
- Called Off My Wedding & Other Turn Tail Signs Of The American Male
Tell you what. Single moms are scared. Especially if she has two. She's looking for a sense of security and normality. Being single with kids is every woman's nightmare. So she's gonna put out and try to snag a man to give her that, out of fear and desperation. Calling her an easy slut was pretty cold-hearted and fucked up IMO. If you're gonna fix it, you're gonna have to make some MAN decisions here.
Like, do you want to be around for this woman? and give her that sense of safety? Or are you just trying to get laid? One of my FBs has a kid, and I do all that for her. I change the oil on her car and help her take care of "problems" etc cuz I genuinely like doing those things for her.
If you're gonna do all that, you'll probably have to go down, buy some flowers, go to her work and say, "I'm really sorry about what I said to you. I was pissed and I didn't mean it." Then just leave and don't say any more. I guarantee she'll engage you again.
Everything the community tells you goes against that, but it's the mature thing to do.
I can't decide If I'm mad at you or entirely too amused at your stupidity. I'm gonna say both.
Me: Wish you were here...I need protection from these club sluts
First off, why the fuck would you ever use the terminology "club slut" in any serious context at all. Ever. You must really like creating unnecessary bull shit for yourself. Also, that line could be interpretted as try hard and lame (as opposed to playful) depending on how awesome in person you are. Just sayin.
Infinity pretty much summed up what you did wrong at the end and what you should do now.
I mean, dude, honestly, why would you ever "experiment" with something like julien's drama if you didn't have at least SOME idea of what the fuck you were doing with it LOL. It's hilarious and fucked up at the same time.
From my understanding, drama is something you start in person and then carry it over into text... Not something that you randomly do over text that could be interpretted any which way and has ZERO sub-communication going on that communicates that context to her... And that "kill yourself" stuff is a tactic that guys use when girls aren't giving them the time of day or they're being interpretted as too needy and the girls need a massive push away to even take them seriously. It's not something you say to a single mom who is insecure, upset, scared, and who knows what the fuck else. And even then, it's like a last resort, I've tried everything else and this is the only thing left up my sleave or I'm going home to masturbate type deal.
If I were you, I would be MASSIVELY embarrassed. You should honestly just cut contact with this woman all together, for both your sakes, or just do what Infinity said.
Yeah I realize I went pretty overboard with this. it started off as a joke but it turned out to be more serious than that. the dynamic with this girl is that we really connected before having sex and never discussed what happened after
Infinity you're right I think may do that tomorrow. and the club slut text was to hopefully show that I see her as more "special"
anyways called her and left a voicemail. here's the followup:
Girl: Do you realize that you told me I should kill myself and now you are calling and wanting to talk???
Me: I was obj joking
Girl: Didn't seem like a joke to me
Me: Shut upp. You're the one who acted like you cared. 20 questions my ass lol
LOL... damn I need practice
i basically had no other options at that point. she wasn't replying to my value offering texts - so i had to stir up some fiery emotions. looks like i couldn't contain the flame though
The whole club slut thing most likely just put her in ASD mode. She even verbalized it later on:
Girl: On a serious note I'm not coming to your house. I'm not a "club slut"
If you want to show her she's special, just qualify her. It's way more effective. How long did you wait in between sending her all of those texts at the end?
Man, you're not dealing with reality here. I've told you the reality. You're applying shit you learned from Julien to a completely different set of circumstances, like you can apply some magic pill that fixes everything. There's a level of wisdom, maturity and empathy that needs to be there to deal with a situation like this. Even if it means, god-forbid, being a bit humble and accepting that you made a mistake. Like this was WRONG:
Me: Shut upp. You're the one who acted like you cared. 20 questions my ass lol
LOL... damn I need practice.
Dude, seriously, DON'T do what I told you, unless you really realize WHY you're doing it.
Dude yeah i understand there's no magic texting cure for this situation. I wa pretty harsh and its definitely a lesson learned about takin things too far
for future reference how do you let a girl know you're frustrated she's closing up and ignoring your texts without pushing her away further or seeming needy?
She was ignoring my texts for weeks after sex so i hit her up with a dose of verbal abuse as a last resort lol
Watch Jeffry's 27 rules of pimp game part 1.
he has this theory, which is pretty accurate IMO. Basically, he thinks that girls purposefully wait and don't text back jus to see if you text this weird obnoxious shit. This helps the girl weed out guys that actually have abundance and social acuity vs. Guys that are living in scarcity. The best thing o do in your situation is just forget about her and move on. If she hits you up again, cool. If not, oh fucking well.
What went down during sex that made her this mad? Did you blow a peter north 7 roper in her eye or something