Just Beasted My First Court Appearance W/O a Lawyer
Fri, 02/01/2013 - 20:10
A couple weeks ago I got a "Summons" in the mail which means that I had to appear in court. It didn't list what it was for or anything like that but I knew what it was for because it was the only thing it could be- Open Container ticket I had gotten a while back for a flask of smirnoff I was sippin on outside a club in NY
My natural buddy and I had just gotten to the club and were waiting on his girl to show up and we had been taking swigs on the subway and there was still about half of the vodka left so I stuck it in my back pocket and figured my shirt would cover the top of it- which it didn't
Anyway- this week I did a little research and realized that a lawyer would cost me MAD money, so I figured since it was such a small thing that I could probably do this one on my own (Probably a dumb idea but whatever- I'm a boss)
Do a bunch of research and I find what I'm looking for- most lawyers that you hire will just aim to get you what's called an "Adjournment in Contemplation of Dismissal" which basically means that if you don't do anything dumb in the next 6 months it will be completely gone from your record.
So I get to the courthouse about 20 minutes before my appointed time and wait in line for about an hour and then go into the courtroom and wait for them to call my name. Wait about 30 minutes and then they ask if I need a lawyer and I say, "No your honor, I'd like to represent myself" (I'd seen enough law movies to know that I should address her with "Your Honor" and then I sit back down and wait another 5 minutes and they call my name again.
I also made a point to sit in the front row so I could see how all the other lawyers were talking and sorta see how each thing went down- so before I got up, I had a good idea of what was going to go down (almost everyone was there was for the same shit)
I go up to the podium and she asks my name and I say, "BuddhaGames, Your Honor" and then there was a pause and from seeing all the other people go, I just say, "I'd like to move for an adjournment in contemplation of dismissal" and she says, "Okay, the court acknowledges your movement" and then tells me to go to the 6th floor" I say, "Thank You, your honor" and go up to the 6th floor and take a 40 minute class and it's all taken care of.
My natural buddy and I had just gotten to the club and were waiting on his girl to show up and we had been taking swigs on the subway and there was still about half of the vodka left so I stuck it in my back pocket and figured my shirt would cover the top of it- which it didn't
Anyway- this week I did a little research and realized that a lawyer would cost me MAD money, so I figured since it was such a small thing that I could probably do this one on my own (Probably a dumb idea but whatever- I'm a boss)
Do a bunch of research and I find what I'm looking for- most lawyers that you hire will just aim to get you what's called an "Adjournment in Contemplation of Dismissal" which basically means that if you don't do anything dumb in the next 6 months it will be completely gone from your record.
So I get to the courthouse about 20 minutes before my appointed time and wait in line for about an hour and then go into the courtroom and wait for them to call my name. Wait about 30 minutes and then they ask if I need a lawyer and I say, "No your honor, I'd like to represent myself" (I'd seen enough law movies to know that I should address her with "Your Honor" and then I sit back down and wait another 5 minutes and they call my name again.
I also made a point to sit in the front row so I could see how all the other lawyers were talking and sorta see how each thing went down- so before I got up, I had a good idea of what was going to go down (almost everyone was there was for the same shit)
I go up to the podium and she asks my name and I say, "BuddhaGames, Your Honor" and then there was a pause and from seeing all the other people go, I just say, "I'd like to move for an adjournment in contemplation of dismissal" and she says, "Okay, the court acknowledges your movement" and then tells me to go to the 6th floor" I say, "Thank You, your honor" and go up to the 6th floor and take a 40 minute class and it's all taken care of.
Sat, 02/02/2013 - 04:07
#1
lol. amazing how simple it is
lol. amazing how simple it is but everyone freaks the fuck out. nice
Sat, 02/02/2013 - 06:35
#2
Ya I've pwned in court a few
Ya I've pwned in court a few times. One time though I got my ass SERIOUSLY pwned over a matter that was incredibly important and personal and yes I should have had a lawyer.
__________________
I go in and I'm crisp, clean and my vocals are fucking coming out like music. - Anonymous MW student
- Autismus Terminus Finis (Root Cause/Cure of Autism Epidemic)
- Called Off My Wedding & Other Turn Tail Signs Of The American Male
Sat, 02/02/2013 - 16:53
#3
I just wish someone would
I just wish someone would call the judge a cunt instead of your honor for once
Sat, 02/02/2013 - 17:01
#4
lol
I'll remind you of that
lol
I'll remind you of that next time you go to court.
I'll remind you of that next time you go to court.
Sat, 02/02/2013 - 19:58
#5
ha ha, gangster
ha ha, gangster
Sun, 02/03/2013 - 05:58
#6
The fuck?
Up here in canukia
The fuck?
Up here in canukia I got merely a $120 fine for open alcohol. Not a court date.
I represented myself once. It was a 50/50 car accident but she was in the fault. The cop who wrote us up was 6 months on the force and didn't know shit. I represented myself. Rightt before my trial I decided to send in a friend to represent me like you would have a lawyer. I told him to just ask for a description of me. She hadn't seen me in like a year and had no clue. Unreliable witness so it was thrown out immediately. Two hours later I show up at her trial and testify against her. She got all the charges laid on her and icewahines insurance remains untainted. Bitch.
Up here in canukia I got merely a $120 fine for open alcohol. Not a court date.
I represented myself once. It was a 50/50 car accident but she was in the fault. The cop who wrote us up was 6 months on the force and didn't know shit. I represented myself. Rightt before my trial I decided to send in a friend to represent me like you would have a lawyer. I told him to just ask for a description of me. She hadn't seen me in like a year and had no clue. Unreliable witness so it was thrown out immediately. Two hours later I show up at her trial and testify against her. She got all the charges laid on her and icewahines insurance remains untainted. Bitch.
Sun, 02/03/2013 - 06:14
#7
Daaaaaaaamn..! No wonder
Daaaaaaaamn..! No wonder girls have bitch shields. They try to fuck with icewahine!!
__________________
I go in and I'm crisp, clean and my vocals are fucking coming out like music. - Anonymous MW student
- Autismus Terminus Finis (Root Cause/Cure of Autism Epidemic)
- Called Off My Wedding & Other Turn Tail Signs Of The American Male
Wed, 02/06/2013 - 05:57
#8
I basically got the same
I basically got the same thing for that walmart condom bs. 150 dollar fine and 40 minute class and it was all over. Still really annoying though.