My girlfriend texting guys that flirt with her
So, I'm in a committed relationship, not open at all, and the other night my girlfriend sends me a text from some guy with odd game. Saying she is a "nice teen girl" and asking her if she had a boyfriend. After he asked if she had a bf, she said yes, and started talking about how awesome I was.
He starts replying with things like "oh too bad for me" and then starts asking her what her hobbies are. So she sends me the text, and says "only you :P" with a little tongue face. I just shrugged it off. Figured it was just some kind of shit test, so didn't want to act jealous. But after he asked what her hobbies are, from the looks of the text, it seems like she was continuing the conversation with him.
I'm genuinely confused about this. Should I be cool with my girlfriend texting guys that are flirting with her like this? Or should I tell her I don't like it?
Grow some balls and tell her to stop if it bothers you.
Showing you how “loyal” she is is a great excuse to her eventually doing whatever it is she wants.
Good girlfriends don’t have to “prove” their good girlfriends. They just act like it and get with it.
What you should really be focused on is the fact that your “girlfriend” is giving her number out to random guys. Did you not think about that?
She isn't. It was a random guy that messaged her on the internet. And it isn't about "growing balls" lol. It's about, if i told her to stop it, would i be failing some underlying shit test, and making myself look jealous/low status.
What platform is she messaging him on?
If that was too inflammatory for you then look here, you made an account to specifically ask about your girlfriend potentially flirting with another guy so you tell me if it isn’t about “growing balls” or not. You’re anxious about it, can’t hide that.
How long have you been exclusive with her? Has this kind of stuff happened before? Whats your relationship like?
I was watching this new show recently called Succession on HBO. Its about a son taking over a great business from his father. In the first episode the son gets caught acting like a bitch on the losing end of great business deal. When the father ask's him about what happened with the deal, the son says hes on it but didn't want to get into a "bigger dick" conversation with the guy. The show displays the father as a real asshole type but I truly believe he is just trying to shape his son into being a dominant figure who can handle the business. His father looks at him in the eye and says "sometimes it is a big dick competition".
Here is where I would say it relates to you and about DaddyJihad's comment above. I've been like you before and dealt with this. If you feel this is not ok you can't read everything as a shit test that you have to dismiss passively. This actually could be one or could not be one depending on how mature your girlfriend is. In either case shes leaning on you to see your reaction. If you don't like it you don't have to be a pussy about it, you could just tell her "listen I'm not cool with you responding to peoples who message you. You are with me there isn't a reason to talk to anyway else". You are afraid of her reaction here. You say it like that and she won't really be mad at you. You can do this calmy with no hints of jealousy or weakness attached to it. In a real instance it's dominant of you.
Sometimes it is about how big your balls are.
yes this is exactly it Valentino. Couldn’t of said it better myself. I’m just more of an asshole nowadays :)
You are afraid of her reaction Tumeric and are hiding behind if its a “shittest” and worrying about your “status” to her. That’s old pickup Rsd dogma and doesn’t translate well to the real world. Especially in relationships, intimate, business, or familial.
Not your fault, dating companies conditioned us all to fall into the trap. You’re in the right place now though. More info and we can decipher this more.
welcome to Cirque De So Game
Well, telling her is what I actually wanted to do. But I held myself back, because I heard in RSD this was a shit test and you should pretend you don't care lol.
But anyways, this is really helpful guys. Thanks a lot.
Yea dude no problem. You can and should tell her. Girls want us to care about this stuff because they want to know that we want them. Chicks love a jealous guy. Total myth that they don’t. Needy and jealousy aren’t the same thing. You should be slightly reactive when it comes to your girl. Its your girl. That posession, ownership and dominance you show with attitude and behavior gearged towards that is highly sexy and high value. Within moderation ofcourse and when it actually counts - Like in your situation.
Its biological stuff that I dont want to get into. Exclusivity is a label. Not rooted in anything. Claim your girl. Your territory.
Lol fellas what have I told you guys about Rsd and "Unreactivity". Haha
Thanks Valentino great response, I may check out that show. There violence and nudity in it? Lol
Awesome man. Thanks a lot. I let her know I didn't like it, and told her I lost a bit of trust in her. She went into super sweet mode, told me she waits for my texts every morning, how im her only one, and told me she wouldn't even talk to another guy besides me anymore. I didn't even tell her that to do that, but hey, if she's offering lol. She is a lovey dovey romantic religious girl, really gentle, so this is usually how her personality is. Anyways, worked out well. Great forum here. Nice to see alternative perspectives.
I've been studying RSD for so long, I'm so use to this shit test philosophy. When she insults you, pretend you don't care, tries to make you jealous, act like you don't care. But sometimes I really do care, and want to be honest. But there's always that voice in my head saying that I'm going to fail the shit test, and make her unattracted to me.
Beautiful responses from DaddyJihad. And thanks Valentino great response, I may check out that show. There violence and nudity in it? Lol
Ha not so much violence or nudity. Its got an interesting family dynamic. Power struggles, ruthlessness, sibling relationships. Do we love eachother or do we use each other. I'de give it a 7.5 or 8/10.
Awesome Tumeric, sounds like it was a shitty as fuck shit test. Fyi, should tell you something about the girl. Dont be fooled by the lovey dovey stuff. Its super immature and insidious that she’d test you like that. Purposefully put her loyalty in question to see what you’d do. Flaunting guys around to make you sweat. Not innocent at all.
whatever though. I dont know much about your guys’ history to say anything more. Good that you remedied it though. Hells ya:)