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My Text Game Has Been Straight Garbage Recently..

27 replies [Last post]
Anonymous

Me: Whatsup lizzy its the sexy bearded guy from earlier

Me: This guy next to me is chewing celery like nobody's business

Me: Like geezus dude only im kewl enough to pull off that shit :P

Me: Lol whatcha up to

Me: If i brought my mom in you'd hook us up w free shit riiiight ;)

Her: Hmmmm interesting good thing he's not in the quiet library and lol i'm not sure about that :?

Me: If u do, anything off the dollar menu @mcdonalds is yours ;P

Her: Geez aren't i lucky

Me: Just playing :)

Me: A double scoop fest at X would b in order

Me: Whatcha doin rn tiger

*Next Day

Me: Moring babe, hope you're behaving. Til we meet up that is

Me: Got a lil roadtrip out to X tday, enemy territory..hows your day goin

Her: Lol my day is fine im just babysitting but whats your name again?

Me: Jihad

Me: I tried babysitting once

Me: Didnt know babies dont drink alc

Me: Weird

Me: Safe to say it was the last time lol

Her: Yeah sounds like tis probably not the job for you

Me: Nah kids luv me. I'd totally kick your ass in a bbysitting competition

Her: You probably would i just put alvin and the chipmunks on repeat

Me: We'd be better off as a team babylove. You whip up some chocolate chip cookies and i'll handle the booze lol

Her: Mhmm yes sounds like a plan

Me: Then we'll put the tykes off to bed (tie em up if we have to) and bust out the drinks to unwind and dine

Me: Hope you make good pancakes ;) bfast for dinner is the way to ma heart

Me: Dw i'll supervise, i dont want my lil tiger getting hurt

*4 hours later

Me: I'm rlly done w this whole 'stopping' @ red lights thing. they'll b giving me police escorts soon

*2 days later

Me: Hey goof i bet my weekend can beat up your weekend

WTF! I sound like a coked up Nazi...

on a bad day

I've taken all this too far and am erratic as fuck. Is this salvageable lol? Guys I don't want this poor girl to have a bad experience texting guys and giving out her num. I'm giving Hannibal Lecter vibes

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Joined: 01/18/2012
This chick sux. Context?

This chick sux. Context? She's gaaaay. But not like Shikorah. The other gay

__________________

I go in and I'm crisp, clean and my vocals are fucking coming out like music. - Anonymous MW student

- Autismus Terminus Finis (Root Cause/Cure of Autism Epidemic)

- Called Off My Wedding & Other Turn Tail Signs Of The American Male

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Daddyjihad1 (not verified)
Oh really? HA-HA! I'm awesome

Oh really? HA-HA! I'm awesome :)

So...I should probably do some behavior shaping here ya? A lil somethin somethin, playful disapprovyio, ynaw wut im sayin?

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Joined: 01/18/2012
Yeah

Yeah

__________________

I go in and I'm crisp, clean and my vocals are fucking coming out like music. - Anonymous MW student

- Autismus Terminus Finis (Root Cause/Cure of Autism Epidemic)

- Called Off My Wedding & Other Turn Tail Signs Of The American Male

Tap Or Click For Personal Coaching Information

Daddyjihad1 (not verified)
Me: Girl you're so boring,

Me: Girl you're so boring, why can't you be more awesome. Like a poptart kitten on a rainbow

Yall like?

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Joined: 01/18/2012
Gonna make her too defensive.

Gonna make her too defensive. Plus I'm getting the idea this is another (if not the same) "instagram model" and these chicks are of the autopilot instinuctual opinion (they're right) they simply never asked for any of this. So you can't expect anything of her or put her under some sort of social obligation to respond to you. It doesn't exist. So you have to go the route I described earlier, e.g. the "heavy hearted" stuff- which works on ALL of them (can't remember if it was your thread or Meow's but he fucked it up too haha), or bond with her in some way that supersedes her "don't talk to strangers" upbringing (like I mentioned in that old thread of yours), or simply offer some sort of value that she identifies with (like Meow's NYC party). These have all been brought up before but no one seems to really want to make those intuitive leaps. Oh well.. guess that's why I'm the world famous dating coach and you're not :p 

__________________

I go in and I'm crisp, clean and my vocals are fucking coming out like music. - Anonymous MW student

- Autismus Terminus Finis (Root Cause/Cure of Autism Epidemic)

- Called Off My Wedding & Other Turn Tail Signs Of The American Male

Tap Or Click For Personal Coaching Information

Daddyjihad1 (not verified)
Nope this is not an instagram

Nope this is not an instagram model. I met her at the downtown mall here and she works at a clothing store. She's a real cutie but she aint no model lol.

We talked about school. travel, studying, chewing loudly in quiet places etc. She seems like the shy nerd type but real cool once opened up. That's why I thought I was being the creep in this texting. We def had a good interaction.

Totally understand the "value" aspect of having things going on in your life to bring a girl too and I've seen it in action with my high school crush and some insta models ive been msging.

"Heavy hearted"? Are you talking about the gum-drop and sunshine thingy? I'd like to make the leap but I'm just not understanding it fully :/

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Joined: 01/18/2012
That's the point of making a

That's the point of making a leap, derp. But yeah all still stands as previously stated. 

__________________

I go in and I'm crisp, clean and my vocals are fucking coming out like music. - Anonymous MW student

- Autismus Terminus Finis (Root Cause/Cure of Autism Epidemic)

- Called Off My Wedding & Other Turn Tail Signs Of The American Male

Tap Or Click For Personal Coaching Information

Daddyjihad1 (not verified)
Ah the bonding like the whole

"or bond with her in some way that supersedes her "don't talk to strangers" upbringing (like I mentioned in that old thread of yours)"

Ah the bonding! Like the whole get relevant topic with the highschool crush girl!

Ok so I need to shape her in a way that won't bring up any guards. Playful disapproval essentially but hit her harder yet softer.

AHHH..harder...yet softer....gahhh...I know what you mean! But I can't think of the words to express it....OH SHIT

Daddyjihad1 (not verified)
Maybe? Girl , you're the

Maybe?

Girl , you're the cutest poptart I've met in the box of deliciousness called life, don't leave me hanging that's lame.

Daddyjihad1 (not verified)
^No one like lol?

^No one like lol?

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Joined: 01/18/2012
Lol. That's pretty good Girl

Lol. That's pretty good

Girl you're the cutest poptart in this Life cereal box I've met recently. But when you leave me hanging like this I get worried. Are you getting soggy?

This might be a bit too much, but it's sharpening and honing the components you brought up in yours. When you make it a little more relatable it goes a long way. But in application I'd probably simplify it to maintain a bit more of an "aloof" vibe especially considering this girl's basically a stranger and doesn't warrant so much effort. At least that's what she'll think.

__________________

I go in and I'm crisp, clean and my vocals are fucking coming out like music. - Anonymous MW student

- Autismus Terminus Finis (Root Cause/Cure of Autism Epidemic)

- Called Off My Wedding & Other Turn Tail Signs Of The American Male

Tap Or Click For Personal Coaching Information

Daddyjihad1 (not verified)
Girl you're the cutest

Girl you're the cutest poptart I've met recently in this box of deliciousness called life. Don't leave me hangin...unless you're getting stale

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Joined: 01/18/2012
No. You keep insisting on

No. You keep insisting on being a passive aggressive putzpah. Stop it!

__________________

I go in and I'm crisp, clean and my vocals are fucking coming out like music. - Anonymous MW student

- Autismus Terminus Finis (Root Cause/Cure of Autism Epidemic)

- Called Off My Wedding & Other Turn Tail Signs Of The American Male

Tap Or Click For Personal Coaching Information

Daddyjihad1 (not verified)
Girl you're the cutest

Girl you're the cutest poptart I've met recently in this box of deliciousness called life. Don't get stale on me and leave me hangin

Took out the passive aggressiveness while still trying to be aloof about it

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Joined: 01/18/2012
You could be like, "Girl

You could be like, "Girl you're like.. that delicious box of Life cereal you take home that ends up being stale." LOL

No don't send that. Haha 

__________________

I go in and I'm crisp, clean and my vocals are fucking coming out like music. - Anonymous MW student

- Autismus Terminus Finis (Root Cause/Cure of Autism Epidemic)

- Called Off My Wedding & Other Turn Tail Signs Of The American Male

Tap Or Click For Personal Coaching Information

Daddyjihad1 (not verified)
LMAO Girl you're an adorable

LMAO

Girl you're an adorable strawberry poptart in this box of Life cereal and I'm a fresh glass of milk. Dont get stale on me

Daddyjihad1 (not verified)
OR.... girl you're an

OR....

girl you're an adorable poptart in this delicious box of life and im the hot microwave oven. Dont get stale on me

TheKing's picture
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Joined: 02/15/2012
Me: I know you like to play /

Me: I know you like to play / I know we’re playing hide and seek, but I can hear you chewing from here babe cheeky

or

Me: Did the baby kidnapped you and now is forcing you to watch Alvin and the Chipmunks on repeat? Don't worry my Batsuit is coming from the laundry... freaking Alfred

Just trying to help, much love, peace.

__________________

Daddyjihad1 (not verified)
Damn it King these are way

Damn it King these are way better than mine lol

Fuck i already sent my gay one

Me: Girl you're the cutest poptart I've met recently in this box of deliciousness called life. Don't get stale on me and leave me hangin

Daddyjihad1 (not verified)
Nope nada

Nope nada

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Joined: 01/18/2012
Who cares she sucks. But yeah

Who cares she sucks. But yeah you chased too much and your subtle craftery needs some work. 

__________________

I go in and I'm crisp, clean and my vocals are fucking coming out like music. - Anonymous MW student

- Autismus Terminus Finis (Root Cause/Cure of Autism Epidemic)

- Called Off My Wedding & Other Turn Tail Signs Of The American Male

Tap Or Click For Personal Coaching Information

Daddyjihad1 (not verified)
Could you actually go into

Could you actually go into the "chasing" too much aspect of it? Like specifics.

I think i've been doing this unconsciously lately and funny because its not even from a place of "needing" the girl as if she's the only one.

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Joined: 01/18/2012
Nope

Nope

__________________

I go in and I'm crisp, clean and my vocals are fucking coming out like music. - Anonymous MW student

- Autismus Terminus Finis (Root Cause/Cure of Autism Epidemic)

- Called Off My Wedding & Other Turn Tail Signs Of The American Male

Tap Or Click For Personal Coaching Information

Meow's picture
Offline
Joined: 03/27/2013
Her: haha just woke up from a

Her: haha just woke up from a nap

Me: hope you feel refreshed pop tart

Me: A nice crispy pop tart now not a soggy one

Her: thanks what flavor am I

Me: from what I've seen so far hmmmm just maple flavored

Me: nothing crazy like oreo or birthday cake just yet

Her: ewww I don't wanna be that

Me: pfff what flavor di you think you deserve kitty kat

Me: do you do any cool stuff or just cat naps all day

Her: I want to be confetti cake flavored, and well today I just napped

Me: Maybe you can be cupcake flavored one day baby cakes

Me: but thats gonna take some pure awesomeness

Me: or just buying me ice cream

Her: I am awesome :)

My adaptation. ..this chick kept on being lame too even after this little challenge scenario. I later hit her with 

Me: slow down j.k rowling these texts are too dense for me to handle

and

Me: Geez you have lots to say

Me: whats your fav color

Me: do you like unicorns

Meow's picture
Offline
Joined: 03/27/2013
Well those probbaly weren't

Well those probbaly weren't the best examples she went gay on me again.

No sunny D for her.

Daddyjihad1 (not verified)
Is this shoe store girl?

Is this shoe store girl?

Meow's picture
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Joined: 03/27/2013
Nahh

Nahh