A New Reminder That I Need to Focus On
Just to give you guys a quick, update... I'm in heavy growth mode in my life.. I'm working at really building up my life in numerous ways. I have my business shit pretty self sustaining..
So for the summer, I want to grow in new ways.. Develop new skills.. Train in a new martial art (savate), do dance lessons (hip hop), throw weekly dinners and volley ball games at the beach.. Get back on a bike...
Anyways.. As well, I want to really step up my dating life in the way that moves me.. Quality. This summer I want 4 new, insanely gorgeous and awesome girls to come into my life.. I don't care so much as banging 20 cute girls.. I want that super quality..
So just a quick realization I came up with here.. I think one of hte mistakes I was making, was just logistically, always pushing the interaction further....
I think, a more effective plan is to wait to push it forward. Wait for her to earn it, so you can reward her. Don't just be down to propose to hangout with this girl, until she's really dispalyed characteristics you like...
As well, message enough so she has a chance to annoy you.. Then do some behaviour shaping and have her redeem yourself.. I think this is something I've missed out on..
Hold off on always pushing forward, until she earns it and the connections becomes deepened, then move forward!!!
What are your thoughts and experiences on this :)
Share!
The reward for doing this is that you may notice that the girl starts to try and pick u up... She starts to invest more into the interaction and even works harder and pushes to hangout.. This is what I'm experiencing right now..
I've been doing some thinking, and I think the times I failed, it almost didn't make sense what I was doing.. I was pushing to hangout too soon, to early, I couldn't possible have been really interested in seeing them...
So now, I'm waiting for it to feel real and it to make sense. And I'm also wanting the girl to invest as much as possible.
It's definitely high value behavior mang. As long as there's some other immersive experience you're having with the girl that keeps her around then yes this can have the results you're looking for. Just remember it's McDonald's out there though. I'd prefer to go with "tactics" a bit more fast-moving. Having a more intricate lifestyle like you mentioned will probably do more for being able to create an enticing lifestyle and/or experience for a girl to be a part of.
Any examples you wanted to mention?
I go in and I'm crisp, clean and my vocals are fucking coming out like music. - Anonymous MW student
- Autismus Terminus Finis (Root Cause/Cure of Autism Epidemic)
- Called Off My Wedding & Other Turn Tail Signs Of The American Male
It's definitely high value behavior mang. As long as there's some other immersive experience you're having with the girl that keeps her around then yes this can have the results you're looking for. Just remember it's McDonald's out there though. I'd prefer to go with "tactics" a bit more fast-moving. Having a more intricate lifestyle like you mentioned will probably do more for being able to create an enticing lifestyle and/or experience for a girl to be a part of.Any examples you wanted to mention?
Okay gotcha... I guess it's finding that balance...
I've just found myself, push things with some really hot girls, and go for the meet up too early, where it doesn't stick... So I'm going to play around with texting a bit more, and letting the rapport and connection build, so they can prove their worth
Got examples? I'd love to take a look. ;) lmao
I go in and I'm crisp, clean and my vocals are fucking coming out like music. - Anonymous MW student
- Autismus Terminus Finis (Root Cause/Cure of Autism Epidemic)
- Called Off My Wedding & Other Turn Tail Signs Of The American Male
Shit.. I don't have access to the ones that didn't end up happening that I pushed for meet to early...
I have something good going now... With a hottie on instagram. And it's fun to see the dynamic by not pushing to hangout too fast... This girl is a super hott chick that follows me on ig and has been liking stuff occasionally...
me: Hey ! Noticed you commenting (tongue out emoji). That's cool you're from Toronto too. How's your summer been
her: Haha if by commenting you mean liking, yes
her: It's been stressful, writing my mcats soon (gun emoji)
me: Hah oh you never commented dammit.. (dissappointed face)
me: Yeah that sounds pretty damn brutal, can't relate in the least
me: Ah.. Just at my hotel. Bout to go to bed but not super tired yet
me: I like to hold off from sleep until I'm on the verge of passing out, it's the best hah
her: Haha I can comment now if it'll make you feel better
her: why are you at a hotel if you live in Toronto?
me: Haha witty and hilarious comments will earn you points
me: I'm in New York
her: You say that as if I need the extra points ;)
her: Why are you in ny
me: haha.. Well I haven't met u yet, so I wouldn't know how awesome or disastrous you may be;)
me: I'm here for a weekend business mastermind. Back mon
her: Emphasis on the yet
her: Pretty great job you have I have to say
me: Awh thanks, it's really great. My favourite part is being able to meet and connect with really inspiring people (This may have been the wrong direction here)
her: Oh I was more talking about getting boxes of free pop chips and walking around shirtless all day
her: Or is the shirtless thing just on instagram
me: Oh yeah cuz that's all I do. Thx
her: Kidding
^ Good move of qualification... So this whole time, I'm waiting to estabilish enough rapport where I actually like her so I can invite her out
me: Yeah u better b (tongue out)
her: How old were you when you first go into fitness
We message some more about boring stuff.. Then I say
me: So how come you're still up
me: Are you a bit of a night owl too
her: Just got into bed but I can't sleep
her: Yes it's terrible
her: especially cus i'm going to the gym early tomorrow morning
her: Where do u work out in toronto.
me: Awhh the worst That's why I just stay up and work until I'm about to pass out haha
me: I usually workout at xxx. wbu
her: Haha what is wrong with us
her: Literlaly everywhere. Depends what kind of work out
Haha it goes on and on... And she starts to suggest things... Oh you should do this class with me.. You better practice so you can fight me...
Ok so I'm just now understanding one important point.. these aren't "qualified" text conversations, right? E.g. these are just random girls on IG or FB, they're not from Tinder or any sort of "dating" app.
And yeah dude talking about meeting cool and inspiring people makes you sound SUPER GAY. Like.. I'm surprised you didn't meet Mateen down in Orlando the other day.
This isn't a "good" conversation. It's about as vanilla as it gets. You're lazy mang. That's what being "high value" does. Good thing I don't run around telling people how cool I am otherwise I'd lose my game too it looks like. Lol
I go in and I'm crisp, clean and my vocals are fucking coming out like music. - Anonymous MW student
- Autismus Terminus Finis (Root Cause/Cure of Autism Epidemic)
- Called Off My Wedding & Other Turn Tail Signs Of The American Male
The idea here is to sort of "invade her reality" so to speak.
The problem is that most guys either try to kiss ass into her life, or do some sort of awkward heavy-handed neg.
Just remember that the way you do it will characterize how she sees you, your continued existence in her life, and the value of sharing any sort of life experience with you, whether it's a relationship or a fling it doesn't matter. Throwing some sort of shitty ass neg at her will only work on low self-esteem girls and obviously not set up the kind of dynamic you want with a girl. Neither will kissing her ass. But being a fun playful challenge, making remarks/comparisons about what you know of her and her life and actually creating shared experiences with her will develop the kind of rapport and comfort that makes "hanging out" an assumed reality. Add in some authority and you've got that sexy "man to woman" dynamic ;)
I go in and I'm crisp, clean and my vocals are fucking coming out like music. - Anonymous MW student
- Autismus Terminus Finis (Root Cause/Cure of Autism Epidemic)
- Called Off My Wedding & Other Turn Tail Signs Of The American Male
I like this on making them wait. I'm finding myself losing interest in messaging them if they can't meet up first time because it's work for me to plan out a time and I'd rather be doing other things. And a few things these girls have done got me thinking that as a result it makes them more interested. Fear of loss being more motivating than the possibility of meeting someone new whom they migjt be interested in but also have resistance to doing.
Whats your mindset when communicating with a girl you've number closed but have only seen in person that first time? Cause I don't see an organic way with most women for me to stay in text convo since I don't know them that well and texting feels dry to me Vs in person