One Month Exclusive - What I'm up to

Yo I've been missing this forum like the flower misses the sun in the depths of winter

I've been in a relationship for the last month - still going strong lol. It's kewl. The girl i'm with is quite frankly awesome. I'm pretty damn picky and it's very rare for me to get along with someone where I could spend all day with them and more. This girl fits the bill. At some point I"m going to have to fuck hott bitches or maybe go travelling and fuck hott bitches but right now I'm occupied on other things. 

I've been rechanneling myself to different areas outisde of banging hott bitches. There are a lot of things that I need to work through and improve at. Growing my online business like a mother fucker. Pretty crazy hit a 40k month in August. Want to consistently hit 50k months. 

Also been getting into pretty insane shape. I did a bod pod test and it scored me 4.8% body fat at 5'10 and 175 lbs. This is pretty nuts. Although I know for sure I'm not quite that lean (5% body fat looks scary ripped and not even attractive). More around 7-8% body fat, but still looking really sharp and it's cool to hit sub 5% body fat on one of the more accurate devices. Want to do some legit modeling for my brand. 

Oh and I've been working through some health shit. I've suffered from shortness of breath (that feeling of not being able to complete a breath) for about 6-7 years ago. Came on one day and never went away. Ended up changing my diet and avoiding chemicals and fragrances, taking b12 shots among other things and I felt nearly 100%. 

But when I bought my audi a7, well I haven't been able to drive it. They sprayed that shit with some powerful chemical leather protector or some shit. And the smell seeps off the leather and fucks me up big time. So I've been rolling in the mazda 6 like a boss! Anyways, going to doctors and shit and I appear completely healthy. No lung issues. I've strated to realize that this tightness of chest and shortness of breath is likely a physical manifestation of deep supressed emotions. And possibly this has lead to different allergies and what not. 

When I started doing breathing meditation, it was a crazy experience. My head and body would get very heavy, I'd feel tingling. After it I would feel deep connection to everyone. I felt true response and non reactivity. But I'd be overwhelmed with sadness/grief. As well the 1-2 days after breathing meditation my syptoms would get insanely bad. I beleive this may be a healing crisis. Perhaps even evidence that intense emotional trauma has manfiested as restricted breathing. 

So I want to spend these next few months improving my presence and integrating a lot of these emotional issues and trauma's. I want to be fully connected and in a state of deep presence and compassion. I'm pretty confident if I can bring everything back into integration, a lot of these symptoms will start to go away. 

So I'm going to work through this breath work (perhaps with a coach), keep up the hypnosis, tolle and even do some therapueatic writing. We shall see! Anyways I'm goign to try and frequent these forums and help some of you guys out more often.