Peepee points to the Manager
So I been busy as fuck with work. Working 3 jobs and balancing a social life is tough shit. Especially when you throw training into the mix.
I been hitting it off with my assistant manager. Shit was going good, we are hanging out lots and speaking a ton. Flirting quite a bit. She invited my back to her place when her BF was outta town as well. No sex but just small make outs and massages as well as just movies. We been going back and forth and started to develop feelings for each other (shit lol). Anyway, she goes into a more serious relationship type of talk. I would date this girl for sure but shit seems kinda messy after this convo we had. (Btw she moved here from across country to take this job, her chode bf moved after a month without her there and she has been hitting me up and getting closer to me ever since.)
Not sure how to go about this. Just treat it like a shit test and continue to game in person and in text. Or back off completely and just drop the situation and girl. This job is just a weekend gig btw.
Convo - Tried to keep this more on the friend to friend side because she got very "I want a relationship with you" type of vibe and things she said in person the night before. Seems to have backfired by pulling too much and giving into the frame. I'm not too sure.
(Starts from midway cause the rest was all just joking around and teasing. A joke got confusing and this resulted lol)
Me: ya the other girls are gonna get all jealous if they notice all this extra attention your getting ;)
Her: Then don't tell them
Me: haha pfft like I have to, goofball
Her: Lol.. if they don't notice the attention you're giving "other" girls besides me then they won't notice me
Me: I think you misunderstood. It's all good either way
Her: So then explain
Her: I'm so tired I had a long night
Me: I'm sure you've seen how much attention (work) has on their fav bartender haha it's pretty funny
Her: Weren't you trying to sleep with someone from work a couple weeks ago? and people have been saying that you're more fun lately and you actually come out aha
Me: I'm just free a little more often now
Her: And by people I mean one person.. but I'm sure others have noticed.
Me: Ah ya well free time and people notice when I'm there and always ask what's up with me
Her: Like who
Me: (blank) but she's a good friend
Her: (blank) knows everything haha
Her: about everyone
Me: haha ya and (blank)
Me: prob (blank) as well that means
Her: (the work place) kills me
Her: I gotta stop haning out with everyone.. it's gonna bite me in the ass one of these days
Me: it's fine though, play it off if they suspect anything
Her: I don't want people thinking anything but that we are good friend
Her: They need to all calm down
Me: i don't pay much attention to those things
Her: Well I didn't .. Until now haha
Me: well no one really talks, it's just how people are, whatever
Her: Did they ask if something is going on between us?
Me: Ya but like I said it doesn't matter
Her: *a long list of letters implying frustration*
Me: Relax lol
Her: What did you tell (blank)!?
Me: i said you're 3 weeks pregnant with my love child and we are running away together next week
Me: *rolls eyes emoji*
Her: (My name)...
Her: I'm being serious
Me: We are just good friends and talking to each other.
Her: Yeah but I have a boyfriend. And that's not going to change anytime soon, so telling people we are "talking" they could get the wrong idea. We are talking but not in that way. Unless we are on different pages?
Me: Nope, that's what I just said lol
Her: But your way of saying it is with a big suspicious smile on your face
Me: That's just my actual face
Me: Shitty situation
Her: I know. So people are gonna get the wrong idea. And it's broken telephone which means god knows what is gonna come out of it.
Me: Relax, it'll sort itself out on it's own. Just kick back and enjoy like me
Her: How do you figure
Me: It's all natural, nothing is forced. Just have fun with it, I wouldn't be investing time to chill with you and you wouldn't be either if it wasn't fun. It's clicking well
Her: K something needs to be made clear... Regardless of feelings, you are JUST a friend. Those feelings have to be put aside for us to continue a friendship. If you can't commit to that then we shouldn't be talking.
Me: it's all good in my eyes haha
Her: My relationship isn't going anywhere anytime soon. It's going through its own shit, but it's being figured out. It's not like it's just a fling, we've been together for almost 4 years.
Her: What do you mean it's all good.. Is that you're way of saying you agree?
Her: Just friends?
Her: I'm gonna have an awesome sleep tonight aha
Her: 100% sarcastic
Me: lol look everything's fine. don't force anything just let it all happen on it's own. I get it, you weren't supposed to get feelings, I wasn't either, whatever. Just look past it and it's all good, maybe your relationship works out, great, if not, then great lol just relax and stop worrying.
Her: We aren't getting together. We are friends. That is all.
Me: Yes ma'am haha that's been said
Me: what's bumming you out?
Her: Nothing everything is all cleared up. I'm going to bed now I have to be up soon. Goodnight.
Weirdest convo I've had with this chick after we have been getting super close. She started hitting me up a lot, all day, every day. Inviting me out with friends minus her bf. Not sure what the next move would be.
Considering ignoring her snaps and texts/dropping her, or just gaming like normal after a few days?.. Really lost for a change. Got 2 other girls on rotation in the wings I can work on in the meantime.
Update - starts from my reply last night
Me: I think it could be better for the both of us if we didn't talk and hang out as much. Regardless of how much we enjoy it. I'm kind of on the fence about it. Goodnight.
Her: If that's what you would preder then I am okay with it. I am confident that we can be just friends, but if you're not then I will respect that.
Me: Well, let's give it a try and I'll decide after a few hangouts. I won't know unless I give it a fair chance. (My way of getting her to still come out)
Her: Sounds good.
Her: I don't really like the sound of you not being a part of my life. So I hope you can put those feelings aside too, but that's just me being selfish.
Me: Ya that's pretty selfish hahaha
Me: I don't want to do anything less than we have been. So, I'm not going to stop being who I am, pretend or do things any different. I don't want you to go anywhere either. (My way of saying, I'm pretty much still going to game you, kiss you, touch you, etc lol)
Her: We will see how it goes
Me: For sure, I definitely want to see you soon.
Her: Me too
Her: Let me know when you're free
Her: I might have a drink with (blank friend that knows everything - referred to above mutual friend) tonight
Me: Absolutely. I have my sister's grad tonight and I'm super sick. I'll take you out soon.
Not sure what the smartest move from here is, might screw over my employment going for this but whatever, side job. Honest to god after looking this over, I think I might have just straight up saved the whole thing LOL. Surprising considering that outburst last night.
You can't even act like you have any discretion. Geezez
Really that bad eh? I thought this was a weird one for myself but at the same time I'm not following what she's getting at by persisting on meeting up with me, etc.
Although now that I've looked over it for the fifth time, I see what you mean by discretion. I just blurted out and admitted to shit there was no need for. I literally made her act that way.. Fuck lol. I'll have to watch that. It's like every few months as my game progresses I gotta come back and get a foot in the ass haha.
Would I just game as per usual at this point? She's still messaging me and being flirty, etc. Could use guidance from that aspect.
Are you going to be discrete? Or are you going to spill the beans on her?
I'm definitely going to be discrete about it. I don't think she knows that? Then again she is still persisting on seeing me and chilling with me. So, I'm confused there.
No man you have to be vocal about that. She subtly asked you twice about it and both times you handled it in a way that caused major concern for her.
You want to demonstrate discreteness. When she asked about who you were trying to sleep with a couple weeks back she was testing you and you were very carefree about it and even spilled a name. That's a no no. You got to be like, "That's no one's business but mine." Or something along those lines. She wants to know if she can test out some new D while she's on the rocks with her bf and you plainly told her that it couldn't be you.
Ah okay that makes sense but when she asked what girl it was I didn't reply to it. She knows who the girl is and we were just talking about someone else during the convo. I usually avoid answering those questions directly. I'll be way more discrete and vocal. You're 100% right about her being freaked out by the way I replied.
I see exactly what you're saying. I think it's 100% still on just by the things she's saying still and what she wants to do as a hangout etc. She's only inviting me out alone or when her bf isn't there.
Shit that discreteness point is awesome. I'm starting to realise that things like discreteness is a much higher-value, classy way of showing you have a lot of women in your life than explicitly/ even semi-explicitly saying it.
Like MW said, the convo sounds like she wants the D on the side without risking losing her long term boyfriend (at least until you commit properly to her haha)
I think it was nice when you said things like she was pregnant with your love child and you're running away together -- just being playful and showing the whole bf/cheating thing is not a massively problematic thing in your reality.. .that you're non-judgemental and just about having fun.
But if you keep being playful and joking... when she provides a serious emotional objection... then you just look like a tool not a solid dude. Which is why I think you tried to deal with her objection kinda seriously.. .talking sorta logically.
I think though, you may have stayed too long trying to convince her to feel ok --- like . 'relax' 'what's bumming you out' 'stop worrying'
Having said that, it sounds like she totally does like you and in person, you will end up doing the same kissy kissy touchy touchy stuff. And in person, I'm sure you can deal with this bf chat much smoother ;)
Just wondering if anyone still does total awkward freezeouts like Mystery used to do. I did it once with this girl that had 'two boyfriends' lol. And it worked like a charm.
Just radical shift in mood and persona from fun and engaging... to .... 'I'm not wasting my time talking to someone who won't act through her intentions... you can leave if you want' (actually saying stuff like this) Maybe this could be a good move on this girl \?
Yeah still do the abrupt emotional freeze-outs.
Honestly boys, it's been pretty sweet. Took MW's tips on being more discrete. Just what I needed to do.
Been seeing this girl often and she's damn cool. Everything was money until the night she spent at my hotel room the other day. When she made her way home, her bf screenshotted our convos and sent them to himself.. then sent them to her.. LOL Fucking weirdo. She was too drunk and forgot to delete the chat logs. This got her all nervous but it's all good. She's still gonna see me and shit.
I don't get this guy at all. Drops his life basically to move across the country to be with a chick that would rather be well, with me. It makes no sense to me how a guy can do all this for a chick who clearly doesn't care about how he feels. I feel almost bad... Then again, I did say if I wanted a specific girl, it was game on.
He has been looking around for her certain nights when she's with me. Coming in to the bar and freaking out looking for her. This mofo is clearly insane lol. I don't know why she hasn't left him yet. I wonder if rent is an actual concern. City is pricy lol..
Naw man.. relationships. Scary fucking shit when you fall for a girl. LOL
Fuuuuck that. That's fucking scary, man. LOL.
This girl will literally do whatever I tell her and all I get for resistance is, "I really like you, but it sucks I'm in a relationship.. so, I can't do that stuff right now. Let's be friends.." *proceeds to get finger banged*
Then this poor chump will send her text after text, missed call after missed call at 3 am and she'll just sit there like she doesn't even hear her phone.
That can't be normal lol