POF and Texting Confuse Me; Please Help. :/

Hello everyone, first post.

So, I've been a long time user of POF, and have actually managed to bang two girls off of there. The first one messaged me first, and the second one I messaged.

However, I'm often failing to get the number, and even if a girl responds to my opener, often times she will just stop messaging me after a bit. It's so frustrating, and I feel like I am screwing up somewhere.

Here are some of my latest conversations:

Girl A:

ME: hey, read your profile, but you didn't mention how good your tree climbing skills are. :b
HER: what you mean

Ok, this one is the latest, and granted it's only two messages, but seriously. WTF kind of question is "what you mean." Does she not understand humor? I feel like, right off the bat, I'm speaking to a caveman. I don't even know how to respond to this. Last time I responded to a chick like this, and explained I was joking, she stopped replying anyway.

Girl B:

ME: hey, read your profile, but you didn't mention how good your tree climbing skills are. :b
HER: Haha, I don't like heights.
ME: NP, we'll get a midget tree for you to climb. When you reach the top, you'll only be 6'10. Try not to fall off. :b

Who are you btw. I'm Paul.
HER: I'm liz
ME: Eliza Thornberry :D It's really you. jkjkjk.

So, Liz, dinosaurs or robots?
HER: Both. :)
ME: Perfect. Who would win in a fight: elephant or whale?
HER: Elephant.
ME: :0 ok fair enough.

Last question: are you a fan of cuddles and ice cream and, if so, do you, perchance, own a portable telephone. ;)
HER: Cuddles and ice cream with brownies!!! Hahaha, maybe I do have a cellular device, but I don't give my number out.
ME: I see. Well, I give out mine, so drop me a text,

xxx-xxx-xxxx.

Don't worry, I'll only call you like 12 times a day, and only after midnight. :b



Ok, so I gave her my number, around 9:27, and I haven't gotten any texts from her yet; it's been about an hour, so I am assuming either she went to bed, or probably won't text me at all. I get the feeling it's going to be the latter, as every single time I have ever given out my number, the girl failed to text me. It's pretty much a given for me at this point, that girls won't text if I give them my number.

I realize some of you just give them your number, and they do contact you, which again makes me think I'm doing something wrong.


Girl C:

HER: Hi :)
ME: Sup. Dinosaurs or Robots?
HER: robots because you can program to tell them what they should do for you
HER: And you can keep a robot for as long as you want to
ME: Haha, nice. I'm a bit of a sci-fi nerd, so robots are awesome.

So, who are you miss cutegirl? I'm Paul.
HER: My name is Erica
ME: Cute. :) id give you a hug if you were here. Too bad teleportation doesn't exist.

So, Erica, strawberries or blueberries?
HER: Strawberries
ME: put both in a bowl, mix the daylight out of em, then put some whipped cream on top. Yum. :D

Who would win in a fight; whale or elephant?


And that's it. No reply after that, even though I've seen her online a few times throughout the rest of the day. Interesting to note here, she messaged me first. What I don't understand is why girls have this massive double standard. I see a lot of chicks on POF bitching about dudes that send them messages like "hi" or "hey." Yet, on the rare occasion that they actually send an opening message, that's EXACTLY what they send. Like, wut lol, she has a pussy, and purely by that virtue, I should now entertain her with witty messages.

Anyway, it's not out of the question that some of these girls might respond at some point tomorrow, as it's kind of late, and they may have just turned in for the night. My gut feeling is that no, they probably won't.

Girl D:

Here is an interesting case. When I first sent this girl a message, I was actually in state. I had just downed a cup of coffee, and for whatever reason was feeling very in the moment, and present. Also, I had Manwhore's text exchange that is stickied above, pulled up in a separate window, and was trying to somehow channel Manwhore through my messages. Needless to say, this quickly fell apart half way through, for whatever reason. You can see it starts off strong. Also, for whatever reason, I was like "hey, Manwhore is being 'aggressive' in going for the hang out. I should do that too," so I kept bringing it up. In addition, I only later realized that that conversation was actually via text, not through POF. DURR. ALSO, real quick, I have not posted the interval of time between messages so far. However, on this particular exchange, she was responding within a few minutes after I wrote her, even toward the end. She just stopped responding after my last message.

ME: hey, read your profile, but you forgot to mention how good your tree climbing skills are. :b
HER: lol i dont know how to climb trees but i wouldnt mind trying lol
ME: Excellent, I'm in love already. :b

Who are you? I'm Paul.
HER: lol I'm Channel. And Really?
ME: Totally, let's get married. We'll have a butler named Jeeves and exactly 2.1 children.

Channel, makes me think of perfume. Robots or dinosaurs?
HER: lol i like you alot already.
Dinosaurs.
ME: Rawr. :3 I prefer robots though. Big sci-fi geek.

It's perfect we met, spring break starts tomorrow and I'm pretty much free all week. Calc. test got moved and everything. How bout you; in college, yeah?
HER: online and i see its nothing wrong with that
ME: Nice, I actually have a class online, it's pretty convenient, but it had a bunch of questions on banking and credit cards. Come help me!

Strawberries or blueberries?
HER: lol okay... and you should already know Strawberries lol. yummy.
ME: I did know though, I was just checking to make sure you knew. Duh.

So, why aren't you here yet? I've got the operating table ready and everything; just need my nurse to begin.
HER: lol what might be the problem sir lol
ME: Well Nurse, the patient is having some swelling and heightened pulse. He'll need an infusion of fluids. Since you aren't here to administer them, we'll need to remedy that.

Lol, do you perchance own a telephone.
HER: i dont own a telephone... cant afford one now... im tied up on my bills and a cell phone is luxury
ME: So, you have your own place I take it. What a G. Hustling through life like a stone cold killer.

How will we stay in touch? Surely you must have a telegraph machine. Skype will work too.


Annnnd, no reply after that.



As you probably noticed by now, I have my own mix of canned messages and variations on them which I employ. My opener is 99% of the time going to be "hey, I read your profile, but you didn't mention how good your tree climbing skills are. :b"

I have actually developed my own little routine, which I rarely stray from. Basically, I try to establish a playful frame right away, and just ask a series of silly questions, regardless of her answers, and eventually might say something like, "okay, you pass my little test, we can hang out now; what's your phone number?"

Lately, I've shifted it to simply going, "oh you seem pretty kewl" and "do you perchance own a portable telephone, and does it have a number?" or some such.


Never the less, most of my interactions fizz out. I have gotten perhaps a dozen phone numbers off of POF total so far, and out of those, only hung out with two girls so far (both of whom I have banged). I have a third lined up now, who I was supposed to see today, but she's dropped off the map all day. She was pretty interested thus far though.


The other thing is that, I'm messaging all the hot girls that are local, and I've pretty much exhausted all of them. New ones are showing up weekly, however I quickly run through those too. I don't think I've had any super hotties respond to my messages so far, and if they have, it fell apart pretty fast, as soon as they realized I have no clue wtf I'm doing lol.

My profile is Pillowmeister, look me up if you want. You can critique my profile, as I feel that might not be on par either. I've had plenty of cases where a girl I message, actually shows up in the "viewed me" section, which implies that she did see my message, it caught her attention enough, and she went to check out my profile, but decided not to respond.


Again, I'm very grateful for any help here. I feel like such a FNG, asking what must be silly questions with obvious answers. I'm sure after reading this, you guys are like "c'mon son." I'm only 19 years old, so POF is one of the few ways I can actually set up dates with new girls. I'm trying to branch out and start going to clubs, but logistically, it's a nightmare for me right now (due to parents, lack of money to pay cover and transportation fee's, and the fact that the nearest club is in DC, which means driving to a metro station, then taking the metro there). I've found a couple dudes off of RSD though, that I can go with. These guys go out regularly, but they are a few years older, live in the area, and obviously have their shit squared away more so than I.

Thanks,

Pillow.