Pure Dominance
Hey,guys there is a dude ,that i met today and he is so fucking dominant,man i mean his friends and the girls,would do everything he asked for,even when he asked me for something,that if anyone else asked,i would say''Fuck you'',i just did it,it was just impossible to say no to that guy .This dude,today completely ruined one of my friends,in front of everybody and i couldnt do anything about it,made him look like a fool,in front of his girl and couple minutes later,he was making out with her.
This is the guy,that women go crazy just for a ''Hey'' from him,in my hometown.Trust me,this guy is on a whole other level,but i cant blame him or the girl for what happened,it was pure attraction,but it was very retarded,to do it in front of my friend.What reaction,do you guys think,we should have,when all this was happening?One more thing,how can anyone say no,to strong guys like that and become immune on this kind of dominance and how can someone get this dominant.
Thanks.
This is an inner game issue on you and your buddy's part. He's using the "Jedi mind tricks" on you. Think about when Obi Wan Kenobi says, "The Force can have a strong influence on the weak minded." (I like retarded analogies like Star Wars lol)
Maybe you can figure this out on your own... Start with how you feel inside when he asks you to do something. You're making an unconcious choice there. What is that choice? What does your brain always seek to maximize and what does it seek to minimize that always results in it choosing to comply?
Surrender to everything you fear that prevents you from behaving this way yourself (bad reactions, fights, etc.) Pretend its the last day on earth . My guess is you wouldn't have time to not tell this guy to go fuck himself and "be dominated" by him.
Telling him to fuck off is one of the unconscious choices... If you do that, you're still reacting to him and you still lose.
agreed. I meant sorta "telling" him with your subcommunications. And not resisting the conflict with this guy in the back of his head if it got to that point.
But you could still tell him to fuck off.
I go in and I'm crisp, clean and my vocals are fucking coming out like music. - Anonymous MW student
- Autismus Terminus Finis (Root Cause/Cure of Autism Epidemic)
- Called Off My Wedding & Other Turn Tail Signs Of The American Male
I think it would be more helpful if you could figure out what he's doing to that makes him so dominant and try to apply some of that secret sauce to yourself. As long as the guy isn't being a huge dick or doing anything too horrible, there's no need to be in opposition to the guy. Besides, if he's as good as you say it probably wouldn't end well for you anyway. It sounds to me like a touch of jealousy. You see a guy who's super dominant and your first thought is, "How can I show that I'm not beta to him." Instead your first thought should be, "What can I learn from this guy."
Try to reverse engineer what he's doing. I'd be really interested to hear your thoughts on what makes this guys so dominant. (Is it the way he looks? The way he talks? The things he says? Etc)
Ok,guys thanks.Ethan,man i know what not focusin on what you say is,i know he is much more present to the moment than me,but i dont know how,but he is better than me i accept it,i dont try to ''defeat' that guy,i wanna know just how to be as present as a guy like that and learn some things from him and also have the power to say no,on what i dont want to do.
Thanks.
I think it would be more helpful if you could figure out what he's doing to that makes him so dominant and try to apply some of that secret sauce to yourself. As long as the guy isn't being a huge dick or doing anything too horrible, there's no need to be in opposition to the guy. Besides, if he's as good as you say it probably wouldn't end well for you anyway. It sounds to me like a touch of jealousy. You see a guy who's super dominant and your first thought is, "How can I show that I'm not beta to him." Instead your first thought should be, "What can I learn from this guy."
Try to reverse engineer what he's doing. I'd be really interested to hear your thoughts on what makes this guys so dominant. (Is it the way he looks? The way he talks? The things he says? Etc)
YES! This is exactly what I'm getting at.
Look up Manwhore's 21 Convention vid, where he was talking about trying to get out of a parking garage and his buddy was arguing with the lot attendant. See if you can look that up. He only mentioned it very briefly in passing... something to the effect of, "You can take my positive way, or you can carry this shit on." That is a HUGE hint into what this guy does to you.
Infinity is right. You're making unconscious choices to allow in other people's bullshit.
Your mind belongs to YOU. You choose what goes in. You chose what gets the time of day for your consideration.
If an external source of any kind is dictating how you feel, you've got some mindset to work on.
The first step is learning to control your mind. You must start practicing No Mind. Bring in 15 seconds of positive thought to get your thoughts under control (anything that makes you feel good).
Then you start to bring in nothing at all - No Mind. "I wonder what my next thought is going to be?" And just watch for 30 seconds, a minute or more if you want.
Then start practicing this in a variety of different situations. Waiting in line at the store, stuck in traffic, a loud noisy sociable place, loud music. Any kind of volatile environment.
When you can bring No Mind in any situation, no matter what is going on around you - you'll have Total Mastery over your mind. Everything, anyone, anything at all, you look and Observe everything. That which does not help (make you feel good), is discarded - you won't let it in.
Practice with the small things. Then when the bigger things come along, they are nothing at all to you.
This is a process, but it is very enjoyable if you allow it to be.
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You're in luck, because I've had an article stewing around my head for a couple weeks now on this topic. I'll put it into words when it feels right. But it will boost your ability to do this in no time at all.
Telling the guy to "go fuck himself" is the unconscious choice. All this does is continue the cycle of negativity in the human collective consciousness.
Anyone who thinks they can be a 'tough guy' and say that when they want is still unconscious on a very deep level. Pain, negativity still going on deep inside of your subconscious.
It just means you haven't learnt true Surrender yet.
Surrender seems weak I guess? To the unconscious mind, sure.
But this is Eckhart's most valuable teaching. You have to go deep to fully understand.
When you learn to Surrender, these guys... these people who come to you and make you feel bad. Make you feel diminished in some way?
These guys HAVE NO FUCKING POWER AT ALL.
When you learn to completely Surrender, these guys, everyone, ANYONE AT ALL - becomes your bitch.
There's no effort, there's no 'trying'. These people shoot negativity and you happen to be around? They go into like a catatonic state in your presence.
This is when people are 100% susceptible to your Jedi Mind Tricks ;)
Sure you can tell him in that moment to "go fuck himself" - but all you do here is continue the cycle of negativity.
Nothing gets accomplished.
Negativity finds its way back to you, multiplied 10 times over.
And you super tough guys, can't figure out why your life sucks. Why you still get angry, frustrated, emotional.
That to me... is being weak.
Give it up already - go deep inside your mind. Fix that shit already.
Learn Eckhart's greatest teaching. Surrender.
Then you can actually start to be a valuable person in society. One who breaks the cycle of unconsciousness and negativity, and shows people the right way to think as a byproduct of being.
Humans are at an evolutionary turning point right now - where the cycle of pain and negativity must be broken. Or human civilization will end. If Surrender feels like being a bitch, then make room for the next species to take over.
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In my mind, everything is cool. Everything is under control.
I Observe without judgement, everything that comes to me. That which does not serve me, is discarded without effort.
I don't 'try' to feel good. It's just that there's nothing to feel bad about. Lol.
Calm, cool, collected. Always.
Peace.
Disagree. While your replie is stellar you can still say go fuck yourself and being present calm, collected and unreactive. Since when a movement of mouth and an exhale of air make you reactive ? The words doesn't mean shit. Of course the conditionning of the language carry some degree of maturity in term of conscience I get that. THE WAY YOU DO it is where the jackpot is at.
"When you learn to completely Surrender, these guys, everyone, ANYONE AT ALL - becomes your bitch."
No they just change their attitude, in the end you own nothing in this world. Control is illusion.
The only thing you can control and SHOULD masterize first, and I use your post (SUCCESS MINDSET) and also Tolle for that, is THE SPACE between STIMULUS and your REACTIONS. This SPACE allow you to CHOOSE CONSCIOUSLY your actions, this is so key it's insane.
OP you sound like a weak. You let this guy step all over your friend, he order you and you complie, and then you come to the forum enhancing him. Tolle is ok but their some biological trait you should HONOR. You have defeat MILLIONS of other sperms to be there, you are DOMINANT from day 1, honor your DNA and step up.
Bitch. (unconcious choice there)
Rael, you're completely right. The energy behind the words is all that matters.
But be careful how the other person is affected by your words. I choose to stay away from negativity as it can be like playing with fire. As long as you're self amused and nobody is hurt, it's fine.
I've been having to re-tune my mindset lately, so I'm sure there's unconsciousness in my replies right now. haha
In regards to control, the unconscious people definitely do fall under your spell. It's up to you to lead them in the right direction and show them the sign posts.
Lets bring each other up here. It was a legit question from Megalos. I've been on both ends of that. I can say that I know how this guy would react to being told to "fuck off" because the way I would handle that is probably to look at you kindof confused like you're "just not with the program" or being a "party pooper."
Guys like that guy are able to apply MASSIVE social pressure and tool you, for example they will start being "fake buddy buddy" with you, put their arm over your neck, pinch your cheek and just make you look like a complete ASS.
The way to handle it is to be aware of what they are doing, go with the flow and ADD TO IT (showing you're not reactive), and then turn it back around on them.
Hey,guys......first of all,i wanna mention that the thing he asked me for and i complied,was before he did all this to my friend,i am not such a fag.Also i wanna say something today,that i was focused right in the moment,i was feeling like,a very happy badass,that was communicating to everybody''Do not mess with me'',hey i know what that control of the mind is,i have done it several times,i just cant maintain this state and also i dont know exactly,how i am getting to this state.
I wanna talk about it a little,when i get on state i am first of all calm and i think,i am visualizing some things,dont know exactly what these pictures on my mind are,also i dont get in state every time i am following these steps,so i was trying to figure out,what is exactly happening these moments on my mind,but this gets me so in my head and everything becomes worse.Also,it happened to talk to chicks,while having this great state and they were taking my phone and putting themselves their number in,but when i was losing that state they didnt want to do anything with me.That was really fucking painful.
It is frustrating,damn.I know,that doing one single session with manwhore,would solve me these problems,but i cant afford it right now and thats even more frustrating.Fuckkkk.
It took me a bit to bring up referrence experience to that kind of situation, I see what you mean. I'd kind of rather not delve too far into that, as it's studying poor in order to understand how not to be poor. But yeah, those kinds of guys or 'alpha males' are exhibiting all kinds of weakness in unconsciously tooling another person.
The correct response here really, really matters on circumstance. Because if the guy is an idiot, a stern "fuck off" will defnitely work. In another situation, a fuck off won't work, and your best bet is just staying non-reactive, be self amused and show that you don't give a shit. As long as you're playing along, you won't look diminished in front of anyone else.
After a certain point, the other guy will just look like an asshole, and you win.
For me personally, I think I've just got to a point where people like that instinctively know to stay away from me.
What it really comes down to is just being self amused and showing that you don't give a fuck. Be the better person, if someone else wins, then be happy for them. That mentality right there will win the girl over a weaker person every time if you're expressing right.
Really though, if you let go of the situation and let your subconscious guide you, the the right actions will come to you to bring about the desired outcome.
Instead of focusing on the guy you don't want to be like, focus on the greatest version of yourself. Whatever you bring your dominant attention to, will bring about the same set of situations in your future.
Don't focus on how you don't have the money - look to a future point where you do have the money, and live with that state of mind Right Now. You'll find the money will just come to you in one form or another.
Out of all these responses Ethan X's was the best.
Just bc you complied with something this guy asked you to do doesn't mean you are weak, as someone on here implied.
If this guy was being a leader in this context, and you hadn't witnessed him make out with your friends girl yet, there wasn't anything wrong with doing whatever you did. Obviously I wasnt there this is just what I'm getting from what you said.
How did this whole makeout go down? Like he was just macking on your friends girl and then just madeout with her in front of your friend? What happened after this?
I have been in situations where I've witnessed shit similar but nothing quite like that. I agree with Ethan you should learn from what this guy is doing. if I was you I'd even bust out my iphone next time he's there and record some of this shit you could learn a shit ton from it
Try to reverse engineer what he's doing. I'd be really interested to hear your thoughts on what makes this guys so dominant. (Is it the way he looks? The way he talks? The things he says? Etc)