Just got back into reading more and it's making such a huge difference. It's also really enjoyable absorbing all this new knowledge. Post books in here that you really enjoyed and recommend and share about why you recommend it.
Daring Greatly- Researcher studied and interviewed tons people on the subject to discover what set those people apart who made bold moves, we're successful, happy, had fulfilling relationships. She found it was proportionally correlated to their willingness to be vulnerable. Not as in crying in front of people but rather being willing to put ourselves in a situation where we can get rejection or criticism. The block to being vulnerable was an unwillingness to be authentic and that unwillingness was held up by people being held back by shame. Those who had the highest confidence and boldness had high shame resilience.
This book is a game changer.
Goes into detail how ashamed impacts us, it our sense of self-worth, confidence, ability to connect, feel love, feel trust. And basically how it impacts our capacity to dare greatly. She breaks down different ways we keep ourselves from being vulnerable and ways successful people combated that. I love this book because it made me self aware of shame patterns, being in denial and showed me that being vulnerable was not weakness but actually real strength.
Models by Mark Manson- Also a game changer. Breaks down how to develop real confidence and how to get women by being honest. Explains the showing desire and not being needy paradox. Explains how the journey of developing confidence while also developing a lack of neediness through authenticity. Explains too that it's a painful process but why it's important. Also breaks down myths perpetuated by the community and explains the reality of it. I love this book because it made me very self aware and also gave me a roadmap for developing core confidence and made a great case for dropping games and being real and how this helped you filter out low self esteem women and have happier and healthier women around you.
6 Pillars of Self Esteen-breaks down how to develop self esteem. Haven't read all of it but very good.
Pathways to Possibility- was glued to this book. How to change your reality by identifying and updating old stories you are carrying around that come from old frames from childhood.
Alabaster Girl by Zan - haven't finished reading it but he describes how most men relate to women (me vs them), not vulnerable, dishonest, I'll intentioned. He instead advocates basically being more loving, compassionate, well intentioned, authentic/vulnerable. "Men who love women are loved by women". I haven't finished it but it seems very good. Several friends gave read it and recommended it as one of the best books they've read on women.
Pathways to Possibility we did drills that do that exact thing. Remember? I'll have to check out Mark's book I had no idea he was talking about connecting with women emotionally. I wonder how good a job he did I hope I'm not disappointed. There any articles of his that come close to what he's doing in the book?
Daring Greatly that's a fantastic premise. I have a super high shame resilience. Haha! Fuuuuu
Oi never mind I got that wrong about Models. Did you edit your post? Lol
I don't remember the drills on that. Was it the cutting the cords one? I'm not very good at connecting emotions with visualizing so that one I had a hard time with.
What I like about hers is that one of the things is writing out the stories. Then dissecting the words and upgrading them. Was several other things will have to reread this book. I love how she gives real life examples on how drastically people were able to transform the way people others acted towards them by changing the story about them that they had. Really powerful book.
Dude that's crazy. Gonna go thru your notes right now
Maybe I edited it and cut something out by accident. Yeah he does talk about his experiences with women and how powerful the connections were because of his authenticity. Like having girls tell him that a week with him meant more than their entire relationship with their ex and multiple virgins deciding to sleep with hi. because they trusted in him and felt a connection.
He gives some ways to connect as like a technique but way more valuable I found was that he emphasizes more on your intent and also on developing acceptance for your vulnerabilities and using that as a gateway to relate and connect to women. I had already experienced some of those things on my own through just self acceptance but his book helped spell out the pattern for me and helped me see it more clearly. Now I'm like excited to learn embarrassing shit about myself because I see it as access to new levels. This book and Daring Greatly were really fucking awesome
I just looked through your training notes we actually didn't do that one, which is bizarre but I remember that in your case you had quite a bit of solid self-expression down, it was the way you were using it, the energy you were projecting we kept having to tweak. You weren't connecting you were sorta having ego battles with girls. You're in a much better place now it looks like.
Hit me up I'll send you the drill we can discuss how it compliments the one you did. I find mine to be way more helpful in some ways because it's a ton more fun.
Maybe I edited it and cut something out by accident. Yeah he does talk about his experiences with women and how powerful the connections were because of his authenticity. Like having girls tell him that a week with him meant more than their entire relationship with their ex and multiple virgins deciding to sleep with hi. because they trusted in him and felt a connection. He gives some ways to connect as like a technique but way more valuable I found was that he emphasizes more on your intent and also on developing acceptance for your vulnerabilities and using that as a gateway to relate and connect to women. I had already experienced some of those things on my own through just self acceptance but his book helped spell out the pattern for me and helped me see it more clearly. Now I'm like excited to learn embarrassing shit about myself because I see it as access to new levels. This book and Daring Greatly were really fucking awesome
Mark Manson's a one trick pony with the vulernability. Which is awesome but he pretty much ignores everythinge else lol. If that's a major issue I can see why his book is helpful. I read a good part of it, and there are some really solid tips, but also a lot of game denalist bullshit.
Also, banging virgins doesn't require trust or a connection in many cases... not sure if that's a myth he's perpetuating or he's just talking about those girls.
Often times its being at the right place at the right time. A lot of girls in the 18-20 age range wanna lose their V card but don't want to do it in their social circles (for obvious reasons, in case its awkward, etc.).
In that case a relatively cool guy who cold approaches her is the perfect opportunity to lose it.
I banged a virgin in colombia on the 1st date from a 10 minute daygame approach. There wasn't much of a connection there lol. My roommate got a same day lay with a virgin visiting from another city. In both cases those girls were sick of being virgins and just wanted to get rid of it.. My other roommate banged a virgin chick as well a couple of months ago, but he def built more of a connection with her.
Right now I've gone on a few dates with this girl who's also another virgin but we barely talk other than we hang out. There's very little text game going on because she's pretty much too busy working to reply but she still meets up with me.... she was on her period last time (so I only got head) but I'm 95% sure that she's trying to lose her v card before she goes and studies abroad.
I think Krauser is the only pickup guy who has talked about this phenenomen, but its a myth that you and a girl need to have an amazing connection for her to lose her v card to you.
Truth. I've passed up two virgins and it wasn't that challenging. The vibe I got from the book was that it was that demographic of virgins that was putting off losing it because they needed more comfort, etc.
I don't think he's necessarily a game denialist maybe more emphasising developing inner game over covering up issues w game/facade. I remember back when he went by Entropy he used to run game and was on Thunder Cat's top PUA list. Not that that says much lol but I would imagine he would be pretty good to get up there.
At least where I'm at now I really appreciate that because in hindsight I was trying to cover insecurities up with game and it was hindering a development of core confidence. I just watched MWs 2008 21 Convention and I feel like I'm naturally coming more from the selector frame. And it's not game I just genuinely started feeling that way after working in accepting my insecurities.
Can you give us some cliffnotes and/or an example of a lesson you learned in it.
That was a pretty solid vid. Reminded me of my roots. Thx