Some thoughts on threesomes

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Fri, 01/24/2014 - 04:23

Jack.Ruby

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Joined: 01/11/2014

Success at threesomes is about having the right frame. Girls who end up participating generally do so because he's a guy who is unapologetic and unashamed about his sexuality. To anyone who knows him socially, though he doesn't talk about it too much, it would be apparent that he's a sexual guy who might enjoy the occasional threesome. All my girls pretty much know how I am. It's no surprise for them to see me flirting with another girl. How and when this is appropriate when you're out with a girlfriend is something I'm still figuring out. There are times when its probably best and most considerate to stop chasing tail and just be present with your girl.

Most of my threesome experience has gone down with me and a girlfriend hooking up with another girl. In this scenario it's important for your girl to feel safe, secure, protected, important, desired etc. You want to be present with her and unattached to the outcome. That being handled, you are also free to flirt with basically whoever you want. You don't hide the fact that you're a man and are attracted to women. You'll even make comments to your girl when you find a girl attractive. It's important to have your girl looked after though, if there's a girl, an interaction or a situation that makes your girl uncomfortable, you want to be very sensitive and aware of that. If she sees that you can handle all that she is free to get excited, as you are, at the idea of a third. There might be times when you want to inspire her to lean into the edge of her comfort zone a little. Inspire, not push.

Abundance is important. Its best if your girl already knows that you're a guy who can get girls pretty easily, if that's clear to her then chances are she feels special in that you've chosen to hang out with her despite having lots of options. She is a queen. For this reason she is not overly concerned about you talking to or about other girls. On the other hand, she knows she is easily replaceable if it doesn't work out ie. she's not with the program. So she is also not THE queen. For this reason she is not inclined to easily get jealous, freak out or misbehave.

There are two distinct schools of thought on threesomes, its about YOU vs. it's about the GIRL. The most common one in the information I've found is basically you set it up like its all about your girl. It's kind of a trick to take the focus off the fact that you WANT this. It's kind of not authentic and chicken shit if you ask me. Again, I think you're best off owning your desire and going after it because YOU want it WITHOUT FORGETTING TO BE UNATTACHED. Too often the tendency is to get too excited about it to the point where you're not present or empathetic and the girl will smell that and hit the brakes.

Flirt, get physical and escalate freely. Do it in front of your girl. Check in with her often and give her attention but never from a permission or approval seeking frame. You're checking in because you care.

Definitely lead. You want to be the boss and owning the interactions. Cocky isn't necessarily a bad thing. Get ready for a lot of attention from guys and girls alike. This does not affect you. Even when guys are looking at you like they want to kill you.

Don't put up with bullshit. Try to not have too many boundaries, but enforce the ones you have pretty strictly. Girls will sometimes try to walk over you when they get in pairs. Fuck that.

the key to selling this is that you believe it's not a big deal and is completely natural. Don't let anyone convince you that it's weird.

Not much of an article but is a few random thoughts. If there's questions ask away.

Fri, 01/24/2014 - 13:54

darkrain

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Joined: 04/16/2013

How have most threesomes

How have most threesomes you've had gone down? I've fucked up SO MANY opportunities at this just by not realising a threesome was possible. The last time this happened I was in my flat about to fuck my #1 girl after a night out, and this other girl I was talking to rings me from outside saying "you told me to come to yours after, I'm outside let me in". Some weird scarcity bullshit in my mind kicks in, and I think subconciously I was like "what if I end up losing my girl over this?" so I just tell her to go away lol. After I fucked my girl she said "I would've been happy sharing you know". I nearly cried

Fri, 01/24/2014 - 14:46

mowlar

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Joined: 08/19/2013

Just ask dude. I had a

Just ask dude. I had a threesome the other night and I literally just said to a girl i've been sleeping with.... 'hey, wanna have a threesome'. She laughed and thought I was joking and I was like no serious, it'll be fun

Then I went to another girl i'm sleeping with and said ' hey, wanna have a threesome'.. She laughed and thought I was joking and I was like no serious, it'll be fun.

After a bit of talk they both were like, 'yeah i'd consider it, depending on the girl' (these were two seperate convo's).. so basically you're just testing the water to see if they were put in that situation how would they react. Now I had a pretty good idea that if both of them were thrown into this situation they would be ok with it.

Then I invited them both over to a 'boardgames night' a few nights later and just said to both of them a few friends will be there, then when they showed up I introduced them and we started playing board games and drinking (I was like more people should be here in a bit). Then I started hooking up with one. Then I stopped and started hooking up with the other, then I threw the boardgame of the table and it was on ;)

Test the water with ALL your regulars by asking them if they'd be down, if they say no then no harm done, but if they say yes then you know if you put them in that situation they'd probably act postively (then you can invite them to a board games night). Now you should have a new found respect for board games. Use it wisely ;)

Fri, 01/24/2014 - 17:33

darkrain

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Joined: 04/16/2013

Haha sweet man cheers for

Haha sweet man cheers for that, I'm pretty sure most girls would still be up for it even if they say no verbally (this has happened in my experience). Throwing a huge party tonight so might try it out

Fri, 01/24/2014 - 20:47

Jack.Ruby

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Joined: 01/11/2014

darkrain wrote:How have most

darkrain wrote:

How have most threesomes you've had gone down? I've fucked up SO MANY opportunities at this just by not realising a threesome was possible. The last time this happened I was in my flat about to fuck my #1 girl after a night out, and this other girl I was talking to rings me from outside saying "you told me to come to yours after, I'm outside let me in". Some weird scarcity bullshit in my mind kicks in, and I think subconciously I was like "what if I end up losing my girl over this?" so I just tell her to go away lol. After I fucked my girl she said "I would've been happy sharing you know". I nearly cried

yeah I would err on the side of being more obvious and overt about it. The way they've been going down for me lately has been more the result of my presence and attitude rather than asking for it. I'll be hanging out with girls and where most guys will try to focus on one and not let that girl see you hitting on other girls, I'll be overtly hitting on multiple girls. When I get them isolated I just tend to go for it. Asking is fine, I'd be concerned that by doing that I'd be appealing to her logical brain which might be inclined to say no. If you just display dominant sexual behavior I think the girls might be more inclined to get swept away in the emotion of it. I can think of a few girls that got carried away in a moment who probably would have said no had I asked.

At a certain point the girls are going to know what's up. You're not trying to be sneaky or hide it, just keep it fun and exciting and escalate.

Fri, 01/24/2014 - 21:03

Jack.Ruby

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Joined: 01/11/2014

If you're still with #1 girl,

If you're still with #1 girl, why not take her out and slay one together. Teach her some quick game, she'll love it