tig ol bittied nine! instagram messaged, requesting backup
LOL so I found this girl on tinder and holy smoke show! I swiped right to "like" her but with no guarantees that we'd ever be matched i was sad. luckily i searched her instagram name cause she had it posted and still had it. in instagram to private message someone you gotta send them a pic, so i sent her one of a drunk girl passed out on the floor haha. i was going to send her a pic of me being awesome but a lot of girls find messages off stuff like this weird and i regonized the building she was in, im there all the time lol. so i sent her that pic of the drunk girl in the same building she lives in or was at and said:
me: *HER NAME!* You are adorable, my lil tinderella. is that *addressofbuilding* in your pic? i regonize it got a friend that lives there. heres a drunk chick from there haha. text me your number beb 555-5555
hours later: ps: i think im pregnant with your child
not my finest hour haha embarrassing to post almost, so i threw a hail mary cause i was banking on her not responding to that first message. anyways
four days later her: yea that is *address* haha good eye
her: as for the pergnancy.... uh that is not possible sorry
she requests to follow me on instagram, i have a private account, i let her
me: promise to only stalk me on sundays? not too much now
me: its completely possible. and called it! your wearing your heels in your apartment though. the fuk. those better be apartment cleaning heels only
her: it was halloween! had to dress the part :)
her: so since you knew the exact apartment building (even the address) is it safe to say your stalking me?
maybe i should tell her its cause i used to drive there all the time to have sex with another super hot resident lol. bad idea.
she seems into me, especially after she creeped my wicked ass pics, throwing shit at me now. i have ideas of where to take this but want some saftey lol. what do
I think it's safe to say that I may not necessarily be "stalking" you, but I am def trying to find a job cleaning your windows. Do you know if they have any openings?
omg i couldn't send that gold fast enough...
=======) - -- -
her: we already have someone sorry
Yeah and they probably left the puddle on the ground that made that girl face plant like an animal I'm not impressed lol
So are you busy I'm out for drinks come meet me I'll thrash you at pool ;)
Send these separately one right after the other
When Manwhore starts telling you exactly how and when to send text messgaes, your best bet is to do exactly as he says.
First time that happened to me, I showed up and the girl was literally already striped down to her thong when she opened the door. I actually am not exaggerating at all. It was absurd
Does that first text fit the context? I assumed the girl was on her face in the pic you sent her.
This chick's a bit more a longshot than some text convos. But these girls definitely value their own time, and your aggressiveness. So I'm throwing it out there seeing if she'll bite
Lol that's what I'm hoping for potted. And yeah it's a bit of a long shot but if she doesn't like these messages there is something wrong with her haha. We'll see. I sent your messages last night, made perfect sense with the context of the photo.
gawd damn spam bot how are cheap presciption drugs going to help me get laid? how?!
after sending that message late last night i get twenty mins ago:
her: im at school hahah
dammit woman, i am in your building a few times a month to use the gym, just give me your damn aprtment number for my high intensity cardio sessions!!!
gawd damn spam bot how are cheap presciption drugs going to help me get laid? how?!
after sending that message late last night i get twenty mins ago:
her: im at school hahah
dammit woman, i am in your building a few times a month to use the gym, just give me your damn aprtment number for my high intensity cardio sessions!!!
When are you back. It's high intensity cardio session day and you know I can't skip
gawd damn spam bot how are cheap presciption drugs going to help me get laid? how?!after sending that message late last night i get twenty mins ago:
her: im at school hahah
dammit woman, i am in your building a few times a month to use the gym, just give me your damn aprtment number for my high intensity cardio sessions!!!
Nice..
@Manwhore: That's an aspect of your text game I haven't picked up on before, in a direct way. Just hit me now in a clear way, for the first time..
Her: whose you friend that lives at *apartment*
i am still only assuming she lives there too. And my friend is a lady friend whom I'd rather keep quiet lol. I was on page with everything that was going on before but now I'm kinda at a loss of what the fuck is going on lol. This is Manwhores thing, I will come through with pics of her dangerously large bosom if this happens
But these girls definitely value their own time, and your aggressiveness. So I'm throwing it out there seeing if she'll bite
yeah I def see that. This girl has loads of comments all over her shit of guys trying to get with her but they def don't the gold in here. If she's got a lot of options and replying to these blatantly obvious direct messages casually she is trying to see how I handle her aloofness and is at the very least interested.
My butler. You there? I'm gonna come over. I'm scrubbed out tho so no tea parties
Lol yeah seems like a longshot...good time just to fire away some funny ones and see if she bites like MW says. I have been out of the game for a bit and getting back into it but experienced this A LOT and then I would wonder why these interactions were not working out....had nothing to do with me or my texts, just more of a numbers game on randomn interactions like this...
My plastic surgeon. You there? I just had my ass rounded...need a massage.
Uh, no. This is a highly calculated text exchange.
really?
No I'm lying to make friends.
Of course. A fool proof plan.
With stuff like this I usually stay right on it. You're waiting too long you're not building momentum.
Yeah makes sense. I'm just thankful for this thread to learn what to text in situations like this. I would never have hit hit hit like that. I guess the momentum is crucial too. Cause in a few days I'll be that one guy who tried to hookup with her agressively once all the emotions fade.
You missed cardio day. Thought you were one of the cool kids
Sent her that and no reply.
No communication since. I apply the advice in patricks thread and send her this out of the blue
me: HERNAME! Is exam time done yet or are you still trying to figure out which peg goes in which hole
2 mins later her: um what
15 mins later me: lol you are simple. Thats why I love you
1 min later her: uh excuse me, I'm not "simple" I just dont use obscene analogies in an attempt to be witty
8 mins later me: I was referring to cave men attempting to solve a children's toy of trying to fit round pegs into square holes, get your mind out of the gutter
me: but its kewl, i could see how you could get confused
me: you finished up school yet or what
her: still writing exams
5 min me: what program you in
3 mins me: let me guess.. not design or engineering.. Film or some shit like that
her: commerce
me: oh fuck i thought you went to ryerson, they have a commerce program
2 mins me: ?
this is all just now. I feel I derped up a bit towards just slightly the last few texts. I let go every so slightly of my boss daddyness even when her replies stayed the same. I think I am going to have to hammer this girl ruthlessly if I want her. Thinking about this more.. She goes to school in the middle of the pickup capital of the world. She probably is rich or at least well off. She is a smoking hot big titty blonde. I know the type of bars she goes to and they are all filled with chodes, she for sure gets bombarded by chodes everytime she leaves her building, i know this for a fact. BUT she probably also gets hit on a lot by some put together dudes as well. They are a lot less than the chodes but this girl has options. I just gotta go more hard than those guys too.. Just being above a chode is not enough lol. I am talking to myself here lol but I can break it down more. Masterbatman knows all about these girls too. In fact he probably swiped over her tinder profile ;)
oops instant reply from her 8 mins ago.
her: *what university she goes to*
which is weird cause its 45 mins away... dafaq? i thought she lived so close.. I am going to go berate her now
Sent her a few more texts.. made a few minor mistakes, did some good things. help me break this down guys.
me: fuck either i am a shitty stalker or you are a deviant sad little liar. I thought you lived in *mycity* but your a *slang for her major* all makes sense now
her: a lot of friends live in *your city* so I am there a lot but I live in *town close to me*
her: call me a liar again and i will cut you
me: yeesh i dont want your finger nails in my arm thats a bit much, do that and I will give you an indian sunburn
me: your story id all coming together now. train it into *mycity* to break away from the books and loser of the thumbwar wiol buy yummy spring ice cream
18 mins ago no reply.
You completely switched up the identity/dynamic of this interaction. You were being all aggressive about meeting up then switched it over to flowery and silly. Maybe it'll work not sure.
Call her a commie
Derp.
I guess I switched cause it was three weeks and no reply lol. Should I switch back or keep going? Obviously Ill see if she replies or not but does switching like that kinda make me seem incongruent, untrust worthy. Cause it could also come off as adding a layer of intrigue
Call her a commie
That is what *slang for her major* was lol
I could hit on that harder framing it with one of my split personalities depending on what she does next. I mean its exam times she proably lives by her phone unless her head is crammed into a book. So if she doesnt reply soon ill switch back to agressive and hit on the commie thing again
I could hit on that harder framing it with one of my split personalities depending on what she does next. I mean its exam times she proably lives by her phone unless her head is crammed into a book. So if she doesnt reply soon ill switch back to agressive and hit on the commie thing again
Haha. Good plan I think