Waddup Playaz, critique my texting
Waddup playa pimps partnaz.
I am recently getting back to text game. I've kept my texting very minimal and logistics focused for the past couple months, however I am now getting back to genuinely enjoying gaming girls by way of text. Downloaded Tinder, that app is gold for upping you texting. While going through my old matches I found a dimepiece who I had a conversaion with before but for whatever reason the meetup never occured.
As far as background on the girl, all her bio says is "thick thighs and nice eyes" nothing too flashy and but she is quite attractive, definitle more so than any girl I'm seeing at the moment, 22yr old.
Here's where we're at now:
Me: you never write, you never call...rents due and the kids are worried sick
Me: what should I tell them
Her: tell them mommy died
Me: that's a little grim
Me: I'll make a makeshift tombstone for you in the backyard next to the dog and the goldfish
Her: thank you, try and keep it light for the kids
Me: put a cardboard cutout of you in their room, they haven't noticed the difference
Me: but...it just doesnt dance on tables like you used to (call back to our convo months ago where I invited her to ruin a local bar's rep and she said she loved dancing on tables)
Her: maybe robots will be invented soon and it can just replace me
Me: yeah...but till that moment I got the necronomicon
Me: I'll reanimate you instead
Me: zombie you and I are going adventuring
Her: sounds lit
Me: it's lit fam
Me: text xxx-xxx-xxxx to make that hotline bling
transitions to text
Her: guess who's back from the dead
Me: I have 3 tombstones in the backyard.
Me: so it's either the dog, goldfish or my wife. hopefully it's the latter
Her: No it's goldy
Me: darn, guess what goldy. We're going tabletop dancing
Her: I don't have legs just a tail
Me: That's a-ok. what would you prefer we fill your bowl fith?
Me: water, vodka, or wine
Her: Mm my three favourite things
Her: Surprise me
Me: yeah eh?
Me: what days you free this week beb
Her: I work everyday for the next 3 weeks soooo
Me: awful schedule for a goldfish
Me: guess I'm taking you adventuring after work then
Her: I'm done at like 10-11pm
Her: This goldfish is on a grind
Me: a "gold"fish would be
Me: goldy what job ends that late, don't tell me youre stripping
Her: stripping is like 6am end time
Her: I work 2-10
Her: the fish bowl gets busy
Me: lmao, forreal beb what do you do
Her: I work at a portuguese bakery hby
Me: hustling sweets?I work sales 2-10 ;P
Her: define sales, where do you work ahaha
Her: and yeah I guess so
Me: (company) d2d
Me: wherabouts you live beb
(no response for 20 mins)
Me: other than the fis bowl I mean ;P
no response. I was trying to handle logistics but I feel like me asking for where she lives might have come off a little creepy and uncalibrated. This girl is very receptive, responds almost immediately other than that last text.
Let me know what you guys think
Dude it was fucking gold but why'd you harp so hard on what she did for work? No girl's going to be proud of working at a bakery. What if she did strip would that be a problem?
Nothing wrong with stripping(she's definitley hot enough), based off her looks and her working hours I actually was guessing that she was a stripper/bartender. Something along the lines of a hired gun. That was more an assumptive tease because I was hoping she was.
Hmm, this is the process of ironing out the kinks. I didn't even think that I was harping on her because I actually thought her working at a bakery was cute. My comment was coming from a cheeky place. But again I didn't communicate my emotions correctly through text. I guess she might've felt slighted in that case and I didn't handle it with the most care.
Also this convo is happening at 2AM there's a chance she'll hit me back tomorrow. If not I'll just rengage and keep vibing. Definitley want to get this one out, she is in dire need of my services
Ahh geezez. Yup, this text
her: and yeah I guess so
clealry she got a little self conscious there. Derp
Yep you're on it.
Yeah depending on how adventurous you feel like taking this you could go into all sorts of fun directions. If she doesn't respond by late tomorrow you could go with something like.. "By the way I lied about what I do.."
And then go into a story about how you're actually an urchin stripper boy. Like Alladin. And you like to ride magic carpets too. lol
The number close was cool!
Yep that was sexy
lol I love how similar styles of texting enacted by different people totally bring out their personalities
make this hotline bling legit made me laugh out loud while I was shitting - I was tryna picture myself using that line cause I loved it and I think I totally could! It'd be hilarious
I bet everything came out faster after that
Lol yes! It totally got me over the hump for sure- it was the missing piece to an otherwise perfectly executed performance