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Pickup Coaching
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patrick.bateman's picture
Joined: 05/20/2013

Yup, you read that title right ;)

Basically the last week has felt like something out of the show californication. 

Yesterday I met up with a super sexy 18 year old Russian model. We go to this pool party during the day. Drink, shoot pool, talk and then I pull her back. We fuck like crazy for a few hours. I drive her home. Get back to my place to eat icecream and watch my uncle play video games lol. 

Then I get a text from this other girl I banged just a few days earlier. She wants to come over to fuck. 

I tell my uncle, "Shit this girl wants to come over to fuck me and I'm all out of fucks" 

He responds, "yah that's a tough life" 

I couldn't help but start cracking up. This life is hard like damnnnn! 

Joined: 06/05/2012
Post the tinder convo :)

Post the tinder convo :)


"Why do faggots always got to kiss the girl?"

patrick.bateman's picture
Joined: 05/20/2013
her: Hey there! :) (she

her: Hey there! :)

(she opened, in da bag)

me: Hey Masha! How's the night treating you? 

her: Pretty good pretty good :) how bout you?

me: Just getting ready to go to bed and watch netflix haha

her: Ah sounds great! Netflix is a great creation lol, but yeah I'm headed to bed soon too

me: I just wish I wasn't out of this frozen yogurt icecream, its soooo good and now I feel a void inside me

(come to think about it, I was messaging her right after I blew my load on some asian chick, hah)

her: Mmm what flavour??? I was craving icecream all day today, but didn't have time to go out and get any 

me: Vanilla with chocolate chicps, gotta let it melt and soften up tho

me: The worst. I'm gonna buy a month supply of icecream next time

Okay I realized that these last texts just got redundant and I wasn't moving the conversation anywhere fun. So needed to change that, but first, had to reinitatie because I didn't get a respondse 

(next day) 

me: Don't just ignore me, say something loser (evil smiley face emoji)

her: Loool don't call me loser ;) but sorry I wasn't going on here all day ahha, and that's pretty good! I love mango icecream 

me: Don't like loser eh? Okay your nickname shall be honey cakes. I liek that. So you originally from toronto or you a foreigner

her: Ahahah all my close friends call me loser, I'm kinda used to it, but we all call each other mean names, cause that's what friends do right? :) and I was born in Russia but I moved here when I was 8 :)

me: Haha all that name calling is going to penetrate your unconsious negatively. Get them to call you queen Masha ;)

me: ANd Russ eh so obviosuly you must have the most intense accent ever

her: OH they call me queen bitch ;) and it's like as a joke with friends so it's cool! ANd I actually don't have an accent... LOl

me: Do you wanna text instead? I'm like texting mostly right now rather then sitting on tinder so I'll be be replyng faster

me: Hahaha yes let's move this to text. What's your number

her: number