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Pickup Coaching
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Buddhagames's picture
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Joined: 01/31/2012
So decided to start going out completely sober. This is something that I can't put off any longer. The short term random lays just aren't worth the damage it would do to me to keep drinking when I go out.

In the middle of finals- so I'm a little busy and won't be posting AS much until graduation is over in about two weeks. Then I head back to san francisco for a bit, where I'll be able to go out in an entirely new city//area (which will be dope).

Anyway- last night was the first night I've gone out completely sober, literally not a drop to drink, in a very, very long time. I've gone out a bunch recently with maybe 2-3 beers but last night I had nothing and that's how it is going to be moving forward.

Couple things I noticed:

1. I noticed that for the first hour or so it was real easy to get into set but I was just being super super rapport man. Like I was able to have a normal conversation and just chill out and talk for a bit but I wasn't getting into myself. When I say that, I mean, I wasn't allowing myself to talk about shit that would pump my own state and get me excited. Also I noticed that I ALWAYS start out with chode talk. Even when I would go out when I was drunk, this is how it would always start out. It always starts out with literally shit like, "Hey, what's your name".... "So what's up"... lmao- it's almost like I need a running start, so I just use that initial chode talk to get myself settled and then eventually the conversation sorta works its way up. Like I noticed that my conversations would start out sorta low energy, casual talk, a little rocky and then, it would just take a little time and almost out of nowhere the momentum would build and all of a sudden it's like I'm talking about some weird shit. At least that's the pattern I noticed with the better sets I was in. A lot of them, especially in the beginning, would just stale out cause I had nothing mroe to say. That's the other thing I noticed, most of my sets that died out... It's not like they died out cause the girl was like running away from me... It's almost like they died out cause I didn't have anymore shit to say and it was like... "uhhh... well.... nice meeting you?" lmao... So that's something that is slightly more difficult when you're sober- just getting used to talking out of your ass, which is something I like to do but I just have to settle in for a bit and pump my state so that I get the juices flowing.

2. Damn, everything is so much clearer. I remember so much more and my conversations lasted a long longer. Not that I'm going out to have long conversations, but it was still kinda cool. When I get drunk, I tend to bounce around from person to person, having maybe like 2-3 minute interactions with each one and then I get distracted or something. Going out completely sober, I would just chill out with each set for a while.

3. This is sort of part of number 2, but I noticed that EVENTUALLY I started saying shit that got me excited, got me in state, got me in that zone where I'm not really thinking but I'm just sorta saying random shit and laughing at it and like playfully pushing the girl away. One thing that I started doing, which I thought was pretty funny and the girls always seemed to sorta laugh at it and simaltaneously try and grab my hand and like touch me after it. Was that I would be talking and if they said something I didn't like, I would literally just turn away and sorta do that, "talk to the hand" thingy but instead of just putting my hand out in front of the girl, i would literally take my hand and place it on her face and slightly push against it, as if I was pushing her away.

4. I didn't pull or get any numbers and I think one reason for this was that it was slightly more difficult to get physical with the girl. Like I talked before about how one of my sticking points was making a move, even when I don't know if the girll is attracted to me and I noticed that being 100% sober, this sticking point was drawn out a lot more and is something I'm going to push through and be aware of.

5. I had better eye contact than I do when I'm drunk. I noticed my eye contact got especially good when I started talkin about shit that really got my own state pumping. Like at one point, this one girl kinda pulled that shit on me where she goes, "Do you remember my name?" and I was like, "No"... and then I started talking about how I don't remember anybody's names but I remember so many other things about them. I'll remember their face, how the conversation felt, what the vibe was and I was talking about all of this and it was almost like, in talking about it, I put myself in this zone where I started to be extra aware of how the conversation felt and then my eye contact got real good and then she started saying how she feels the exact same way and then she asked me for my name a couple times and then I did that face palm thing and she like started laughing and grabbed my arm and pulled it away but also tried pulling me towards her. Then I sorta maneverued my way to the bar so I was leaning up against it and she was sorta leaning into me... It was a solid interaction but then one of my friends came up and saw it and was like, "Oh did you guys just meet" and I go, "Yeah" and he goes, "Ohh, this is so and so's gf" and so and so is kinda a buddy of mine and the dude who said it is super chill and I didn't want to fuck with that so I peaced. But she came back and tried to talk to me twice and we did but I wasn't interested after that.

6. lmao, I'm a LOT better at befriending dudes than I am at having sex with girls. Like dudes aren't an issue, in fact a lot of the times, I'd be having these sick ass conversations with the guys in the set and then the girls would be like, "the fuck?" lol- gotta work on that intent.

Anyway- This is going to be it for a while. No drinking when out, it's not sustainable, it's not healthy and it's much harder to really learn and operate when you're drunk. I'm gonna have a lot of work to do now that I'm not drinking but I know it's worth it and is going to pay off HUGE as I continue to go out and beast.

Let's get some feedback here. Dudes who always go out sober.... notice any of these same trends in your game?
__________________

It's Just Something You Have To Do If You Want To Be Great- Manwhore

"Apart from the pulling and hauling stands what I am, Stands amused, complacent, compassionating, idle, unitary, Looks down, is erect, or bends an arm on an impalpable certain rest, Looking with side-curved head curious what will come next, Both in and out of the game and watching and wondering at it."

Owitsparxx (not verified)
LMAO at #6 that too has
LMAO at #6 that too has happen to me quite often, and i also game sober you learn alot better and faster IMO
Andre (not verified)
when i started
when i started hardcore 6 months back all i've ever done is go sober.

I think at first i surprised myself by how shaky i felt talking to the hottest girls i've ever spoken to in my life, like i would stutter and mess up my words a few times or i would have my wing play the 30 sec game to get me to approach.

Solid eye contact was on and off, and i didn't want to talk too loud because i didn't want everyone hearing me spit game. I got drunk on the rare occasion there was drinks available at my bro's PR nights and it was like i was a different person - no self doubt, just dancing wildly, still not approaching too often but a chick would come eventually and we would either dance or makeout.

For the past two or three months i've just slipped into this sober 'party boy' vibe, where i can freely be as crazy and unstifled as i want - i can say dumb shit from the get go to a total hottie without really caring. I wouldn't say i'm an unflinching cold as ice muthafucka but more and more the club starts to feel like my temple of relaxation and i feel like i'm cheating if i'm drunk.

oh yeah, i think when you're sober and go out a lot you seem to feel a lot more in control of yourself than the other guys who are drunk and messed up. Guys just seem to think i'm cool a) cause of my awesome dance moves or b) cause i'm black lol a dude tried to make out with me the last time i went out, so i try not to befriend them too much and keep my distance.

also, the club scene becomes so fuckin funny when you're one of the few sober ones watching shit go down (drunk guys walkin into walls, bitches cryin and getting into fights, floozies trying to escalate on you...) it's like an amusement park every time you go.