I want to get a girlfriend/main chick and still bang on the side- How do I make this a reality?

Hmmm maybe I am looking at this wrong, there is a chance I could perpetually just go on dates with this girl and dodge any relationship talk. I highly doubt that though, and like I said earlier it would be cool to have  girl that I can be like yah baby you're my #1 those other girls are just some friends of mine.

This girl's gaming you. 

AWWWWWWWWWW FUCK. I don't really feel one-itis towards her, BUT I guess her immature little act is influencing my behavior. I'm gonna let things breathe for a few days, then she's coming to my place on my terms and sucking on it all night long.

Yeah who knows she's probably barely conscious of it but clearly it's happening if you're already thinking about wifing this girl up. This girl does not deserve that kind of treatment. It's a facade she hasn't earned shit

"They are all girls I've met through Tinder so they don't have a clue about each other"

They all know you are on Tinder. Wait till you get the "Why do you still have a profile?" talk lol.

"I've been on two dates with this last girl, and things haven't gotten sexual yet. She just turned 18 and is super immature when it comes to men, it's actually adorable. She is actually embarassed when I game her in public because I draw too much attention to us LOL. Anyways, it tooks MONTHS to get this girl out. When we do go on dates she makes the logistics impossible for anything to go down, she won't let me pick her up in my car, schedules plans super close to our dates so I don't have time to pull her anywhere to escalate, etc. Normally this would really piss me off but I actually don't mind whats going on, I've just been chillen with her and she's starting to open up to me. I think next date she will come to my place. She is very captivated by me and she is persuing me in the highschool romance type fashion (tells me to text her when I say goodbye during our dates)."

This is what Manwhore meant by her gaming you. She's setting the pace of emotional investment and sex. She's screening you for boyfriend status while you have to tag along as her friend vs. you fucking her and screening her for girlfriend status, like you did with the other girls. Tellingly, you thought the other girls were mediocre (which could just be looks, or could not), but this one seems special. Why? Because the more time and energy you spend investing in her before fucking her the more you'll value her and start to construct a fantasy reality where she is special. You can thank Meow jr. for that one.

Releveant Lil Wayne lyrics:

"All my bitches love me, and I love all my bitches

But it's like as soon as I cum, I come to my senses"

(And of course I realize if you're fucking 6's and an 8 comes along who you feel there is a possibility of sex with, you'll consider her more "special".)

Further she is letting you "win her over" i.e. she's "starting to open up to me". You should observe this because this is how you should be when gaming girls, having THEM work for your emotional openess. I doubt she is super "captivated" by you as much as she views you as a strong bf candidate and will allow you to continue to audtion for that position. I mean, you're essentially her boyfriend now "(tells me to text her when i say goodbye during out dates)" without the sex. I find it strange that here is no mention here of kissing or otherwise, by the way. Any physical escalation so far?

"also her older sis and my friend know we are going on dates with each other."

Yeah, there goes another issue, social circle pressure is on you already to date her. That'll be a big issue. Some practical advice besides fuck her fast and without performing too many bf behaviors (as your describing above), is to meet as few of and spend as little time with as many common social connections with her that you can.

The more people you two you know in common, the more pressure there will be on you to "do the right thing" (and date her in the blue pill frame if you start fucking).

Now, there are benefits to social circle of course, but that's a major downside. Unless everyone is super cool and open, in which case it'll be a very open relationship more likely, with her being aggressively sexual with other guys. But that's not what I think you want, I think you want a sweet girl who you can be affectionate with and see 1-2 or maybe 3 times a week, while also fucking random girls as the oportunity arises.

"we could craft something amazing together"

Totally possible by the way, without monogomy. But the more time you spend in boyfriend auditions the more chances she has to find faults in your frame and the more likely she is to disqualify you for intimacy unless you promise her monogomy.

"I just don't understand if this is something I would have tell my main chick about."

Don't ask. Don't tell. Also, don't lie. Dig deeper and find out why she cares about what you do with other girls. Does she want to control you for some other purpose? Are you two going to get married and have kids together? Understand that boyfriend/girlfriend is the female favored form of socially acceptable (feminist) extra-marital sex. Fucking outside of marriage as boyfriend and girlfriend is no more or less right than fucking casually with no strings attached. However it highly favors women in that it restricts something they have near unlimited access to (dick) while cuts off something you need to work hard for, need time and momentum for, and even a bit of luck (pussy).

She's in the middle of a lake saying she will only drink your water, but if something happens she'll just scoop down and grab a drink. You're in a desert, or you will be, after 6-12 months of monogomy and not going out to fuck new girls.

"I am just concerned about her because she is NOT a sexually liberated girl...yet"

How liberated do you want to make her? A slut, but just for you I imagine.

"baby you're my #1 those other girls are just some friends of mine."

Kind of. But there will be a delicate play of words here. You're going to need to be very careful how you phrase things.

"I'm gonna let things breathe for a few days, then she's coming to my place on my terms and sucking on it all night long."

This isn't a bad idea. But the truth of this is that you should be more advanced strategically so even if she resists initially you should be adept with frames to be able to get her to be willing to be isolated. Use all this emotional intimacy she's extracting for yourself: "I enjoy talking to you so much, I feel like we could talk for hours. But last time we hung out you had somewhere to go right after. Let's plan on staying in and watching a movie/cooking dinner so we have some more time together etc." basically play into the role of boyfriend in so far as it allows for you to have oportunities for sex. Find something that matches your vibe though, don't do that verbatim.

All in all, I'm being too gentle with her. I probably could have made logistics better last time If I really pushed it. I'm gonna have her over my place to see my dog like a good boy would do, then I'll teach her how to properly suck a dick in my basement. THE END.

Meow you already understood all the dynamics Merv fleshed out, right? Was any of that new to you

That's not bad at all. 

Here is the dealio. I realized I was being WAY too soft with this girl. I had to really minimize my game to get her out with me the first time, she just doesn't seem to respond well to any crude sexual humor/etc. I kept on pushing this pg-13 rhythm without realizing that it was time to amp it up. She is really into me, but it is totally a disney love story to her lol.

...So I've been on a little trip for spring break, which gave me a perfect chance to be aloof and high value towards her. She actually sent me a text message one morning, which blew my mind because that just doesn't really happen! She's really interested in what I've been up to, telling me to be safe (girlfriend talk). What I've been doing is not giving her too much in return. I've been priziing myself hard, and keeping any lovey dovey-ness to a minimum.  Also, sent her a hilarious sloth meme about dragging my nuts across her face. She is coming over my place saturday to meet my dogs, then meet my dick.

Here is the dealio. I realized I was being WAY too soft with this girl. I had to really minimize my game to get her out with me the first time, she just doesn't seem to respond well to any crude sexual humor/etc. I kept on pushing this pg-13 rhythm without realizing that it was time to amp it up. She is really into me, but it is totally a disney love story to her lol.

...So I've been on a little trip for spring break, which gave me a perfect chance to be aloof and high value towards her. She actually sent me a text message one morning, which blew my mind because that just doesn't really happen! She's really interested in what I've been up to, telling me to be safe (girlfriend talk). What I've been doing is not giving her too much in return. I've been priziing myself hard, and keeping any lovey dovey-ness to a minimum.  Also, sent her a hilarious sloth meme about dragging my nuts across her face. She is coming over my place saturday to meet my dogs, then meet my dick.

By "too soft" I mean that I haven't sexualized myself enough. I still game the fuck out of her and prize myself like a motherfucker. I'm just missing the whole element of WWE wrestling her in public places and slapping ass. Right now, she probably doesn't know that I plan on whispering dirty things in her ear as we fuck.

There is no "but", that's what you want.

One writer on non-monogomous relationships says specifically that you want to give the girl the disney experience minus the monogomy.

In a sense you're playing into her blue pill relationship model (disney) in so far as you are giving her the emotions associated with being her boyfriend, while also maintaining your independence, specifically the ability to fuck other women without it being a "violation" of the relationship.

In essence you are drawing out the beginning three months of a relationship, where the two of you are fucking and hanging out semi-non-committally to approximately three years, on average, by giving her the perfect disney fantasy experience (minus the promise of monogomy), so that she doesn't question you about fucking other women since clearly what you and her have is so special and any othe girl clearly wouldn't matter.

Also, expect a point somewhere after three months after fucking, perhaps even three months after your first "date", for her to bring up "what are we?". This is "The Talk" and the smart move is to pre-empt it with seeding your frame of independence while also caring for the other person, and also initiating the The Talk sometime before you think she will, so it's on your terms, not hers i.e. you don't want to be caught off guard for it.

Finally it goes without saying that generally if you have a girl in this prime position, your main, then generally you only ever have fuck buddies on the side but not say "multiple long term relationships". You can but it might be harder to swing.

OLTR is the main

MLTR is the mid tear

FB is the most casual

Now that I've explained all that, sure you need to be sexual with her, but the thing about a girl like this is she'll need more of a connection with you to feel safe about opening up sexually. So the idea that you'll have to lay more groundwork is not out of place. However, this doesn't mean this sort of girl has to take more time to seduce, just that she needs to be lead through more comfort around the idea of having sex with you. It can still be accomplished in one night, it just has to be done correctly.

Hope this helps.

Good points

She succcccckkkkkkked on it!!!

She's most likely a virgin and doesn't appear to know her way around a cock very well. I can't believe I put her on a pedestal Lol! I brought her to orgasm three times with my mouth and fingers cuz' I'm a wizard and told her I was gonna fuck her and she just didn't seem to even understand what was going on. Could barely talk dirty or anything and looking me in the eyes was just too much for her at some points. Blowing a load in her mouth was nice though!

I know the LMR busting was lame and I did some verbal prizing but it just felt like a solid NO so I was content with a nice blow. 

Will bang soon and see how I feel about her then.

HAHA this is funny I think I sort of got complacent here to a degree cuz' I feel very satisfied with the womenz lately. I need to push myself!!!

Lol this is so great

Game. Blouses. 

"She succcccckkkkkkked on it!!!

She's most likely a virgin and doesn't appear to know her way around a cock very well. I can't believe I put her on a pedestal Lol! I brought her to orgasm three times with my mouth and fingers cuz' I'm a wizard and told her I was gonna fuck her and she just didn't seem to even understand what was going on. Could barely talk dirty or anything and looking me in the eyes was just too much for her at some points. Blowing a load in her mouth was nice though!

I know the LMR busting was lame and I did some verbal prizing but it just felt like a solid NO so I was content with a nice blow. 

Will bang soon and see how I feel about her then."

You wet bandit MEOW haha good shit man. Dude it sounds like all you did was reframe the way you looked at her and the situation and made it happen (blowjob wise).

Surprised you didn't find the essence of love with her after blowing the load in her mouth haha (I did some time back "heavenly things).
Doing that is always the greatest.
Truly happy for you Meow! :)

'Cuz we're always cumming in girl's mouths. Don't get me wrong it's still a slice of heaven on earth.. but so's riding motorcycles. Building a successful business. Making your own money. Creating something meaningful. Standing for something. Going hard. Always

Fuckin beautiful. I just cried and busted a nut at the same damn time.

Chico looks at Tony and says, "Que quieres Tony?"

Lmao!

Hey anyone got a solid gameplan for banging when you're limited on time?

I got a coffee with this chick and we went back to my dorm and she said she couldn't stay long. I assumed this was bullshit but once we got back to my dorm her mom was texting her like crazy. I told her to tell her mom that we were going to see a movie etc. but she made a big deal about it all. Not a problem, I assumed I could get her turned on enough that she forgot about all that shit.

I escalate and keep on pulling back, "but wait...you can't stay.." This works out pretty well and she starts sucking my dick and I take her pants off. I start fingering her and bring her close to orgasm and stop "We shouldn't be doing this, you have to leave soon." She grabs me and keeps on trying to make me touch her pussy. I tell her ,"damn baby it would feel so good to put my dick inside of you right now," She says "...next time." She had her phone in hand this whole time which I tried to seperate her from at one point. She sucks my dick a little bit more and then we get up and leave.

Now, obviously I could have got my dick inside of her in the time we took just playin around. Not sure if I played things right, my teasing may have just reinforced her fears. I was thinking framing it has "baby we need to make this quick so you can get a dose of this dick" is a better route to go, or maybe actually giving her an orgasm and just putting my dick inside her once shes super turned on. 

I felt like she may have played me a bit so I reframed hard when I was walking her out talking about her not having the stamina to keep up with me and how she is a church girl nun virgin. She pretty much said that she was sad she had to leave and that next time she's going to lie to her rents and come over and fuck me. She's texting me now saying she owes me blah blah blah. So everything is all good da hood, BUT how could I have made this go down in the <10 min. we had together ? 

Yeah dude that's an obvious one. Just stick it in her as soon as she's ready for it. Wtf didn't you.

P.S. Stop giving me boners at the gym

Wow, mega gay I let the whole time constraint get to me I guess. Good lesson to learn though.

I had some lingering thoughts that she was going to give me LMR cuz' i'm still not sure if she's a virgin so I wasn't direct enough with her. Which is again, GAY.

Banged her! She is a straight up starfish it was AWFUL. Also, she had all these objections about what speeds I should be fucking her at lol. I was like "babe stop i'm gonna fuck you at my own rhythm now, ok." After I hit it hard she was acting like it was bedtime or some shit. Plus, I couldn't get her to talk dirty whatsover and I made is VERY easy for her. Which totally was a boner killer for me like I can't just fuck a piece of meat.

The whole experience really just turned into the mountain climber to face fuck...which is arguably the best sex move around.

I wonder what Merv would have to say about starfish. He probably knows about their mating rituals, diet, psychology, family dynamics, the whole nine yards!

Andddddddddd she's no longer on a pedestal now haha.  

Nope. Honestly she should probably be paying me :P

So the whole "i'm the prize you're going to have to prove yourself to me" frame used to just be a game tactic. It is slowly becoming a reality. I seriously felt dissapointed because I put a lot of energy into this girl and she just doesn't have game. I'm not going to drop her immediately but we probably won't ever be anything special.

More than anything this shows the importance of getting sexual as quick as possible. I pussy footed around for too long and now it's created this psuedo intimacy between us, and I can't feel amazing about a girl if our sexual chem is not there. Now, I have to be careful not to lead her on and one way or another she's going to be upset. 

THIS. Although sometimes things go down where you almost exclusively like a girl 'cuz the sex is so good but outside of that you don't actually like her beyond that - not to sound like some huge emo dude haha. I mean don't rule it out one way or another, bro. You never know, she could be a quick learner and her sex/head game improves substantially? I'm not advocating for anything in particular besides keeping an open mind, although I do understand your frustration/disappointment in the situation haha. 

Very good. 

No in your case you simply don't know how to draw out the best of a girl. Lol 

Yah man I'll see what she can do. She did improve greatly with the head. Busted in her mouth, took a cat nap, busted in her mouth again. MUHAHAHAHA.

Dude, complete opposite for me. Like the chick could be so fuckin different than me and if we have great sex it won't even matter we will have a great time together. I was banging this Puerto Rican chick that lives in the local shithole city in a little apartment and I'm some suburban white boy Justin beiber motherfucker and we got along so well.  

Could you expand? Btw me saying that wasn't taking a jab at FWB. I like that girl for her lol.  [ Not sure if you meant for it that way. ] I take that to mean good sex is a consequence of great chemistry? Which may be the case and I'm just rationalizing some of the other girls. 

Meow do you want to explain this one. 

Yah, I'll give it a jab in a little bit i'm making tea lol

Make sure it matches your bloomers :p

So are we specifically talking about girls you've already banged? I'm having a tough time writing something original that Aequitas doesn't already understand. It keeps on sounding like Merv wrote it!

I'm thinking that bringing the best out of a woman starts with being charasmatic as fuck. If you don't think she's fun or she's low energy you need to express enough awesomeness to overwhelm the interaction. This is done by vocally projecting a wide range of emotions and sometimes being borderline obnoxious and opinionated. I remember a few weeks ago some chick was being super boring and I loudly expressed that "everyone at starbucks is a freakin weirdo!!" I then went on this rant about weird starbucks social justice warriors. She felt my passion and got super invested in the conversation. A some points I was telling her a story, it was clear that I was a self facilitated beakon of energy that she could chose to join.

Most importantly, you must prize yourself and make a girl work to live up to your standards of a real woman. As you've probably noticed most of the people that went through MW's training are super cocky. Read some of Jihad's posts, it's hilarious! It's not that anyone is actually self-centered but it is super awesome to create narratives where you describe yourself as a superhero, spy, italian model, famous person, etc. All that is really going on is we are expressing that we are high value. Aequitas I know you already are a cool dude, but i'm talking purely conversation skills here. You could probably add some creativity and emotional variance. From here, it is easy to verbally express that a girl needs to work hard for you. Tell her what she would have to do to really impress you, "Girl chocolate chip pancakes are my fav, I hope you can cook. Oh yeah, wear a sexy apron too. I'd like that!" Never stop challenging a girl, because they never stop shit testing men either. You can also be challenging in a serious manner too. You should be questioning any serious character flaws, "pfff sounds like you party a lot, you're not one of those girls that is only concerned with drinking and partying right?" When you challenege girls (seriously or for the sake of a funny narrative) they start working to impress you and establish their worth. This brings the best out of women.

How's that?

Haha bro you're mervin' it. ;) 

Actually, that was really really helpful. Thank you, like forreal. Yeah I notice I start challenging less and less the further I get into a relationship w/a girlie i actually like. It's like I get complacent and I'm like "alright cool, got this one. time to chill and chode the fuck out." Not exactly, but I feel like I don't have to bring it as much. I feel like a lot of this I can put into practice already but it will require me to kinda remind myself fairly often, until it's automatic. 

That's really good dude. And totally opposite the point I was hoping for LOL. So yes that's the massive part that the vast majority of guys are missing. But the OTHER important part that Aequitas is missing, that is in fact so damn frustrating because it acts as a receptor antagonist to him learning real game, is the fact he's got about 40% of the crazy issue you had till just a little while ago. You know... the one that was eating away not just at your game but at your life. Lol. Honestly I can't believe you haven't recognized it in him before.

Inb4 fake Mervin account posts the quadratic equation of game

A very average cock? 

Lol im playin...

Aequitas  can be passive aggressive at times when things don't go his way. He is still holding on to the idea that he needs to try to be cool and doesn't like his self image threatened. It's basic macho man masculinity stuff. 

Its not even close to the bullshit I had going on at one point but It is funny that Aequitas still feels the need to act cool when he lives a super abundant life and IS cool. This is why the sincere n' silly texting was hard for him to adapt to with that last girl. All of this will ultimately limit the how deep your intimacy is with a girl, therefore it's tough to bring the best out of woman.

Still working on it too mang :p

Haha fucker. 

Oooooo. Hit me right in the feels. YES. Like actually it's so dumb how I feel like I HAVE to sometimes show that I live a super abundant lifestyle to a girl. Not good. That's not confidence, that's arrogance. I think it's generally there, but particularly creeps its head out more the more vulnerable I feel in the situation and this makes sense 100%.

Haha fucker. 

Oooooo. Hit me right in the feels. YES. Like actually it's so dumb how I feel like I HAVE to sometimes show that I live a super abundant lifestyle to a girl. Not good. That's not confidence, that's arrogance. I think it's generally there, but particularly creeps its head out more the more vulnerable I feel in the situation and this makes sense 100%.

That's just half of it though. Acting aloof can be fun to play around with if you're sincere n' silly about it.

More specifically it is expressing when you're butthurt about something. That was the downfall of your last girl.

Exactly. Ain't nothing drying her up more than being salty.  

lol!

Yah I used to go off on girls and I thought it was coolio. Last few months I haven't cared enough to do so even if if they may have deserved it, having too much fun :) Like MW told me you're probably better off erroring on the side of being too nice (not in a chode way but you get the idea)

Exactly. The vinny chase mentality - it's ALWAYS allllllllll good.