Supa Hot Bar Hostess (Text Game) - Says I'm Annoying? Pff
AYO! Just gonna hop right into it.
Chatted up this bar hostess a month ago, was kind of bland, she's 18, hella hot, I dropped a hella hilarious improv dance story about fat chicks grinding on me, she LOLs, I get the number and text her later.
April 2 (2:05AM)
Me: Hey Michael Jordan, driving my friend home he totally owes me pizza now - Jihad
Her: Sounds good XD just let me know when you'r ein need of pizza
April 2 (12:30PM)
Me: Aw you're gonna take me out for pizza how sweet of u :)
April 2 (5:30PM)
Me: Hmph fine, u don't get to see me on a good hair day
Me: Melted cheese on bread rlly brings out my luster ;P
April 3 (4:40PM)
Me: Gawd im so done with this whole stopping at red lights thing. They'l be giving me police escorts soon
Her: XDXDXD weirdest text i've ever gotten
Me: Lol weird? More like awesome B)
Me: Whatcha up to pumkin
Me: Im about to raid TJ maxx for patterend socks
Her: on my way to PT
Me: Plastic tits? I see. Well hey the bigger the better is what i always say!
Me: Be careful on planes tho babe..
Her: no sir
Me: What happened, did u slip on a slice of pepperoni?
Me: Didnt know something so delicious could be so dangerous :P
April 3 (7:30PM)
Me: oh man can u spare me al the details like gawdddd ;)
*Nothing. Clearly you can see she has no sense of humor and isn't giving me anything. I don't think i'm being too weird at all. The pizza stuff is all relevant to our interaction. The playful disapproval didn't work either cause she's not even invested enough to care. Damn the hot girl complex.. lol
April 7 (8:40PM) - (My buddy sent me this text so I naturally, I had to send it to every girl on my phone to test the response)
Me: bad news pumpkin
Me: I didn't save 15% or more by switching my car insurance :(
April 7 (9:50PM)
Me: lol whats up boo u didnt get the joke? Everyone's laughing their asses off!
Me: your granny panties aren't bunchin up again are they?
*Nothing. You could say that the car insurance thing was irrelevant but COME ON, that was funny. Then I figured I needed to sexually disqualify her to re-set the dynamic, but she isn't invested enough to even care. I'm not on her radar and if I try to get on her radar she's just so lame with no investment.
**Funny enough. I gave up on her. Funny enough, a week later, I see her and she's the cashier of this smoothie place I go too lol. I walk in with a friend and we make eye contact and she smiles and gives me a super coy "Hey" and I go "OH NO. We're not eating here dude. Lets go". A big laugh ensues and we go to the register. I tease her about being a bad texter but she's tries to tell me I'm bad, HA! Nah son.
I create a big scene, convince one of her lesbian co-workers (yes they are finally on my side now), and now have a makeshift lesbian wing telling her that I'm an awesome texter. My buddy and I get our drinks and leave. I should've capitalized on the interaction but whatevs..it's over.
A week later I go in and see her again LOL. This time I'm standoffish cause I've kind of forgotten about her and let my buddy do the talking. He orders and I go off checking out the healthy scrumptious snacks and chit chat some other co-workers. I check her out from the corner of my eye and she keeps making glances at me. She eventually goes, "Are you gonna get anything or are you just gonna dance there?". Real flirty like and I said something gay can't remember lol...or don't want to remember.
Anywho, we get the smoothies and my buddy is super sly wing and tells her to write my name on the cup LOL. She has a shy yet flirtatious tone to her voice and goes, "I know how to spell that". Then my buddy inquires more about our relationship etc.
Anywhowhowhow, my buddy can't drink his cause he's allergic and they can't replace it so there's a mild fiasco going on about my friend's peanut allergy. I handle shit, tell them to call their manager but they couldn't for some reason so I just grab my friend and say "Byebye".
Didn't capitalize here either cause I was just done with her. Didn't really care. We bounce.
Yesterday I started testing out some re-engagement dynamite on girls and figured I'd test it out on her as well:
May 1 (9PM)
Me: *Pug Pic
May 2 (12PM)
Me: *Pug pic
Me: u didnt let me finish..
Me: *Pug pic
Me: ok now im done lol
Me: whatsup you
Her: im at school hahah
Me: OH NO r u ok?!
Her: yes gaga
Me: Gaga..? i knew it. They're torturing u with totally useless information you can't even txt straight!!
Me: The bastards..
Her: You're so weird
Me: hm thats weird, people usually say sexy
Me: they're hurting you worse than i thought
Me: stay strong pumpkin. the pug squad is on its way
Me: although they can't help u with your bland texting ;) they r super cute&cuddly
*She reads images like ASAP and responds ASAP so when I saw her read it and not respond I quickly acted lol. This could've used a lil mod to make it hit smoother but whatevs.
Me: *Pug pic
Me: this reminds me, i got summer classes in 2 weeks ugh
Me: im gonna need these guys to bust me out
*Nothing - Ok so I know the last few were gay and random cause at this point I was trying too hard to get her back. I feel gross just reading them. I've been trying to text back faster and come up witty stuff on the fly more so excuse me fellas ;) - I don't like sitting there for hours crafting genius.
*2hours later today (May 2 2PM)
Me: *Smoothie king meme (where she works)
Me: and they tried to kill my black friend ;P
Her: You're annoying lil
*Haven't responded yet cause I'm not sure way to take it. I can see how i'm being annoying cause it's starting to get too silly but I'm seriously trying to get something out of her to take it somewhere. Her investment is low and actually I'm not sure if she's calling my friend annoying or me. I think she did mention he was annoying before idk lol.
Not offended but I feel like a silly answer would prove her point...yanaw wut i meen?
what a fag, she sucks
Maybez she needs a different texting modality. I'm super locked in on sincere n' silly and obv that's your speciality as well, but it doesn't always work. Be mildly insulting like the online gals or something
Not sure how i'd switch to it at this point, considering I have to respond to her "annoying" thing, and have to hold back on shitting on her life. She is 18 and in her last year of highschool so she's definitely socially underdeveloped. Top it off with being a hot girl going to a school with "Catholic" in the name and yup lame
If we're thinking of switching styles, how's this ngigas
Her: you're annoying lil
Me: Me? Or my friend? Either way, that's crazy baby. I'm just tryna to see if you got a personality to go with that cutiepie face of yours
Me: What lol? Darling did you skip english class today? It's ok, I still think you're cute n mischevious
"Don't be mad cuz' you forgot to shave your legs this week"
Like dat vibe. Let her know you aren't phased but don't appreicate her being a crabby lame ho.
How about a tone like this. Also an 18 year old high schoolers that was extremely underdeveloped and now takes my cock on the reg. Pay attention to the minimalist qualification stuff and the silliness is like a 4/10
See that's the thing holmes. I like that but I already know she's gonna read it and not respond. That 18 yo girl you're talking about had serious affinity and investment for you, pushing the WOW factor in those cases is overdoing it. This girl don't give a fuck lol.
But maybe she does need a backhand to the face, or the back of my dick...muwah..ha..he..muwahawhhae.
God but i like that shave your legs thing SOOO MUCH
Babe don't be mad cuz you forgot to shave your legs this week. It's ok, i still think you're cute n mischeviousus.
You should srsly take care of that tho :P
You're right, you're trying to hard and its too silly. You started out with some jokes and she was laughing, but you kept hitting her with them and she fell off. Then when she was annoyed you went and hit her with the granny panties text. Being gamey is the wrong way to go here. If you hit her with the shave your legs text she'll probably just roll her eyes and the hole will be deeper.
I'd let it breathe and send her a mildly arrogant text about some cool shit in your life later on. Like a day or two later text a cool gym pic or something and talk about how you killed it. Then segue into normal conversation.
Mhhmm very delicious worb. It does feel gamey.
However, I don't want to let it sit on "you're annoying" cause the last memory will be. Oh ew it's this guy again.
Just something to clear the waters and I can re-engage later.
hey sorry babe I'm being a tease i know, can't help the charm sometimes ;) lol but i'm just playing with you
How was your day
Hmmm good point! I like it.
You guys got any mods to make it hit smoother? Or is it good enough?
Went with this
Me: Hey my bad babe im being a tease i know, can't help the charm sometimes ;) lol. Hows your day been
We'll see what happens!