Hey! Ask me your text game questions, and post up your convos.. I'm HERE TO HELP!

What did I do wrong here?

me: hey i have 3 melinas in my phone  which one are you..the crazy one, the cute one, or the random one?

her: the cute one(; lol nah jkk. its the random one u came up to me one morning I was at my locker aha

me: oh hi. are you the same one that stares at me or is that your twin?;o

her: ewwww lol you must think im a creep lmaoo! I didnt notice that I stare at u ahaha 

me:just a little..its cool dont trip just say hi 

her: oh woww lol. I will if i remember to tho ahaha. crimsonchin rite ?

me: write it on your arm you wont forget;p..and very good thats +2 cool points melina

her: ha na ill rememer.. it just depends if i feel like saying it& yuh cant give out cool points if u aint cool (x haaha jkay ;p (right here I was like wtf)

me:dont be shy ill probably just ignore you;p and thats -1 punk..wait do you smoke?

her: haaah okay that just makes me not wanna say hi then lol i dont wanna b eignored lol and noooo aha.

me:im jk dick movida, a you think its too cold for ice cream?

her: Nooo not even! aha its better anyways in the cold weather

me: you just want me to get sick huh;p should i get choclate or vanilla (i took like an hour to reply here)

no reply

From here I was gunna go for the meet..is it cause I took to fucking long  like a bitch and shouldve just invited the ho for ice cream?

Oo aight shit is hitting the fan!

day 6 (today) I texted her something along the lines: How can anybody miss my call... you just broke my confidence :(

Her: alright :D

I have a ''hunch'' she is taking this shit way to seriously. 

she's not taking it seriously at all... 

I didn't realize you were talking about choding out once you were fucking her. Totally lost me on that one but now I understand..

So you need to explain this ED problem to me mang. It's some kind of performance anxiety and it can definitely be worked through.

Ok as far as post-sex goes, the best move I've ever seen executed is the "phone call the next day". Rogan is someone that used to be extremely talented at keeping mltr's. Better than pretty much anyone else I ever saw. After fucking a girl he would just give her a call on the phone and talk to her for a bit. He had lowered, slow tonality, and he would just talk about anything with her. It was like pillow talk over the phone. That's the greatest setup of all time for mltr's. Sorry I didn't get back to you with this sooner. I was travelling the last few days

Steve and Dacook, how'd it work out for you two? 

fuck me now

so i can get some o dat pilllllow talk

Taking it out!

Dacook what's the backtstory with this girl? For a girl that went "MIA", she's all of a sudden showing a lot of investment. This isn't a casual encounter with a random chick at a bar whose number you got. 

I would just go with some kind of funny text about your job.. then segue into some kind of invitation for her to come out

took out

You've got bigger issues than this girl mang. I'm not going to help contribute to delinquency here. Maybe some of the other guys will

Awesome forum nonetheless, what are you on about when you say delinquency by the way? 

P.S: You can delete the former posts

Edit: Took some of the text out.

I met this girl a couple of nights ago at 4am while i was walking home from the clubs, I stopped her as she walked past me on the footpath and made out with her within 1minute. I got her number and she took off with her friend.

Heres the convo so far

ME: Whats up pumpkin, did you survive your walk home last night?

HER: Hey hey, I did! It was a long walk home! How are you?

ME: Good to hear! Im well, just been cleaning the house. What did you get up to today beb?

HER: I slept off my epic hangover! Haha feeling a little rough. Whats your last name? I'm going to facebook stalk you if you dont mind...

ME:

I think its pretty clear that im going to give her my last name because she probably doesnt fully remember what i look like. Im just trying to figure out how i should write the message? 

Thankks dudes

Just be like, "Sir Trickassmark 

Ok so she never text me back BUT she just added me on facebook. Whats my play?

Would something like this work?  "Found me! Youre just as cute as i remember." 

I'm not sure the vibe with her but when switching to a new communication medium it's usually a good idea to play it closer to the vest. "You found me.." Then insert that scene from The Saint with Val Kilmer and Elizabeth Shue, LOL 

lol ya that would be pretty funny but I dont have a smart phone. Ill have to work something else, any suggestions?

ME: "Found me, now its my turn to stalk you lol" 

HER: hahaha well thats only fair

ME: I dont remember you having a kiwi accent, how long have you been in australia?

HER: About 7 years, id say my accents pretty subtle now haha ive been around australians for too long

ME: 7 years with us australians, you poor thing lol. What did you get up to today?

HER: Haha you people aren't too bad. hung around by the pool and cleaned my apartment, nothing too exciting. What about you?

ME: Hanging by the pool is always a pretty good day ha. Ive been chilling too. Just made a green smoothie!! Where did you say you lived again?

HER: Lucky you! Im on my way to work, heaviest of days haha. I live in *****, where do you live?

ME: Yeh work doesnt sound very fun. I live in ****** , thats walking distance for you lol

HER: Hahaha far out, that walk the other night was a complete punish. Everything seems like a good idea after a night on tequila.

ME: Haha im actually impressed that you didnt surrender and hail a taxi. The problem with tequila is that it only seems to come in shot form lol

HER: Haha oh so true. Hit me like a ton of bricks. I was whinging the whole way home haha

I want to try and get the meetup with this chick but shes already said shes on her way to work. Its 5:30pm here and i think she works at a restaurant/bar so i doubt she finishes until at least 10pm. How should i try to push towards a meetup? Also any crituque on my text game so far is more than welcome.

You don't even want to think about that until you figure out her schedule. She's probably closing. No girl goes in at 5 and leaves at 10. Just ask her if she's closing or if it's a short shift. 

K, if shes working late should i try to organise a hang tomorrow or should i just leave it for the night and text her again in the morning?

ME: I bet. So are you closing tonight or is it just a short shift? Im assuming you work at a bar or restaurant btw.

HER: Yeah i work at a restaurant haha its probably going to be a long one. Always is!

HER: Where do you work?

ME: I work from home, i play online poker for a living. Its good because i can sleep in when im hungover ha.

HER: No shit, thats pretty cool :) I only work nights so i normally get to sleep off my hangovers too

ME: Well you will have to come to the beach with me one of these sunny days then!

HER: Yeh id be down for that! :)

ME: Cool cool, im going to play some poker then have an early night i think. Talk to ya soon beb.

HER: Sounds good. Talk soon!

NEXT DAY

ME: Whats up beb, you get to sleep in this morning?

HER: Hey hey, yes i did. It was glorious haha was so wrecked. How are you?

ME: Ha I bet. Im good, just been drinking coffee and doing some washing, fun stuff! What are you up to today?

HER: haha nice, just about to walk into sushi actually, then my brothers coming over to chill by the pool.

Dont know what to say now that shes told me shes busy today...Literally never done this txt stuff with a girl before so if theres any basic general shit that im potentially missing please feel free to point it out. For instance, what is my general gameplan here when trying to get her on a date with me? Should i try to keep our convos short on days that she cant meet up? 

Go on the main site and read the text game article I wrote. It's on the front page

Cool ya checked it out, plenty of great advice in there.

ME: Just make sure you dont go in the pool too soon after sushi, its not safe to eat and swim lol! What are your plans tonight sugarbooger?

HER: haha never would I. Im heading to a dinner :), what about yourself?

Seems like shes giving me excuses so i dont ask her to do something. Obviously she could just be telling the truth. Would you still ask her to do something after dinner or should i just ask for her entire weeks schedule and try to plan something in advance? 

dont know how to delete this post.

Sure it might seem that way, but if you look at it, it's actually an invitation.

"I'm saving the world.. one ice cream truck at a time. Maybe you should meet up with me after dinner for dessert!"

I've been hanging with Evil Stifler the last couple days so my temperament's a bit different right now.. he'd probably say something like, "Oo dinner? Sounds good what are you cooking me? I'll bring wine" 

What's a quick rundown of evi stiflers text game? 

Sonds lke hes working massive volume so I'm guessing he cuts to the chase pretty quick.

This is just a typical "Ignore anything in the past completely and send a value-giving text". This is easy mang. You're tripping balls and you're already in the losing mentality. STOP 

Just shoot her a happy thanksgiving text. There's a thxgiving one in the text message database. Something about if the pilgrims had caught a cat for thanksgiving instead of a turkey, we'd all be eating pussy for thanksgiving. 

OMG- I used that "thanksgiving cat pussy" text soo much last night on tinder lol jesus... what a doozy- saw it on manwhore's facebook wall and literally almost crapped myself when i read it... instantly started mass opening with that shit

Another one, not nearly as good as Manwhore's, but still pretty funny, that I was using was, "I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land."

Ha!

Alright, I've been number closing a lot at UCF lately, and I've realized that my text game is horrendous. 

Text Convo #1-
Me: Happy pilgrim indian day
Her: Happy Turkey Day
Me: How's it going?! Did you eat a ridiculous amount of food like me last night?

Text Convo #2-
Me: This is a VIP number, store with care. :p
Her: Is this ---c
Me: Hey now it's ---k, but you were close. Was your lunch amazingly awesome?
Her:Damn one letter off. It was definitely delicious, thanks for asking haha
Me:I guess I'll let it slide this time. =p
I wish I would have eaten! I'm ome to work, and I'll be surronded by food. Bring me some badass serbian food?

Text convo #3-
Me: Movie night at la casa de Erik Saturday at 6:03. Hope to see you there. ;)
Her: Hahahaha.....6:03???? Haha...but u have to pick me up in ------- ------- cuz I don't know how to get to your home haha
Me: Ahhh geez!! Well, at least you'll get her faster old lady.(she drives slow af)  =p

Her:hahahahaha ok...:)
Me: I got sick, which almost never happens!! So, you could nurse me back to health and feed me chicken noodle soup, or we can have movie night next friday. :p

Her:I would like to go, but I am also sick, lets leave it for next weekend..:)
Me: Hello my favorite little Ecuadoran. =p  Friday night, we're hanging out.

Me: (a day later)Me: Happy pilgrim indian day

Her: Thank u...same to u :)
Me: Still joining me for movie night?

Her: I can't is my friends birthday :(

You should start mixing in some group social events. There's no context to these girls so can't really help you too much. Are these convos mostly one and done? 

Yeah, a lot of one and dones. For the first two that is literally the extent of the entire conversation. Both college UCF girls. Had a weak number close on the first one, but the 2nd one was pretty solid. 

Me: This is a VIP number, store with care. :p

Her: Is this ---c

Me: Hey now it's ---k, but you were close. Was your lunch amazingly awesome?

Her:Damn one letter off. It was definitely delicious, thanks for asking haha

Me:I guess I'll let it slide this time. =p

I wish I would have eaten! I'm ome to work, and I'll be surronded by food. Bring me some badass serbian food?

This one came across like you were forcing it a lil

Hooking a girl long-term over text really doesn't have much to do with how often you guys are texting her. You're always going to lose some zeal in the text conversation if you guys are cities apart, etc. You're supposed to be naturally inline with this and not getting needy over it. That's a big sign 

Ok so this is a girl who ive already been on a day 2 with and im trying to lay tonight. Im mainly wondering about my last txt and If i handled it right. I could have either said "ill give you a txt later to see where youre at" or " ill give you a txt later to let you know where im at"

Which ones better? Probably doesnt make much difference but I think the latter is more dominant/masculine.

ME: Hey whats doing, hows this sunny day treating you?

HER: Gloriously haha how about yourself?

ME: Haha just wonderful. Me and a couple of friends will be out in the city tonight and you should come! We will probably start off at **** and end up wherever.

HER: Haha well i'll be working until about 11 then my work friends might head out to the city aswell :)

ME: Sounds like a good plan beb. Ill give you a txt later and let you know where im at.

lmfao wtf

Yep good stuff. Then you need a good "reengagement" type text to open it for the night once you're out. "Looks like a bunch of homeless people decided to dress up for xmas and come to the bar I'm at. How's your gig going" 

Ok so this is a different girl who I met last night and number closed. These are our texts from today. I sent my last text at 4:01pm in the afternoon and she just replied to me now at 10pm with a fucking wink face! How the fuck do i respond to that? Does she want my cock or whaaaa? Shes a french tourist btw.

ME: Whats up pumpkin, did you end up surfing today?

HER: Im in big hangoverrr

HER: omg

ME: lol you should go for a swim, you will feel better!

HER: Done! 10 times...

4:01pm ME: Ha, im still tired from last night aswell. Think I might sleep for a couple of hours now.

10:00pm HER: ; )

What are you doing tonight?

dont make it too complicated. Get her on the phone talking 

Hey Manwhore and everyone. I'm new here.

I met a chick at a bar Thursday night. Didn't kiss her or try to (one of my sticking points) but I created a lot of tension and comfort. Then I gamed her group and when they were leaving I insisted on keeping the party and she said she couldn't cuz of her friends and offered to give me her number so she did.

Then on Friday I start texting her. My text game is awful and I know it so I relied on an old pdf I have from Kezia Noble and your 19 rules of text game. Convo goes like this:

Me: "Sup Angela Merkel twin, bet you're thinking on taking over Obama right now" (she studies politics and while fucking around I told her she looked like Angela Merkel)

Her - 1h45m later: "Haha youre damn right, always thinking about world domination"

Me - 1h4m later: "Yeah right, in other words you're at home listening to country music :p" (she's from Texas)

Her - 5h9m later: "Haha not exactly. What are you up to this weekend?" (wtf, 5 hours to reply)

Me - 12m later: "I'm at a cool bar with 10$ free pizza with the guys from yesterday. What about you?"

Her - ~5m later: "Im going out with a friend from home whos leaving tomorrow"

Me - ~26m later: "Make sure to give her a good last night! And enjoy it you too"

The last message was suggested by my wing after me thinking about what to reply a lot. He said that it sounded like she was busy right now and that if I wanted to get with her I should do it tomorrow (aka today). My thought pattern was "is it needy to ask her if she wants to come with us" and well derp, this is how it ended.

What stuff should I have done differently and how do you think I can reengage with her for tonight?

Thanks.

That country music text was clutch. I may have to "borrow" that one 

The second part of that last text is pretty homo. "Make sure to give her a good last night! Don't worry if you get arrested I won't judge!" 

That sort of thing.. You left it on a really dull/chode note. Kinda like you blended your nuts and spread them over bread like peanut butter 

That'd be an honor, go ahead lol.

I get it. But do you think that I should've attempted to ask them to come hangout with us? I'm not sure how to read her reply. Is it an I'm busy reply or I have a friend with me let's hangout reply.

Yes absolutely. If in doubt you can always qualify it with something interesting

"You ladies can come hang out as long as you promise to at least make an attempt at behaving!" 

Well, fuck me. Thanks for the feedback and suggestion.

A little context. I met this girl at a bar last night. She was with a bunch of guy friends and one other girl. I pulled her from the line in the bar and made out with her within 2 minutes, she then said she had to go back to her frineds in the line. I met her again during the night and i bounced her outside to get cigs, we chilled and exchanged numbers before she went back to her guy friends in the bar. Before she left she did mention that her guy fiends had been cockblocking her all week.

K so this chick obviously wanted to get laid but I think it was hard for her to sneak out of the hotel infront of all her guy friends(theyre all on holidays).  I pretty much dropped most of the text game and just tried to not say any "stupid shit". Would you have played this much different?

ME: Whats up beb, this is brody...not bradley lol(she kept calling me bradley)

HER: hahahah baby

HER: I had to go, my friend was a mess. Want to meet up later?

ME: For sure beb, what time are you coming back out?

HER: Want to go to urs?

ME: Sounds good, ive got wine at home. Come meet me out the front of beergarden now.

HER: How long will you be there? Im at our hotel.

ME: Ill be in beergarden till it closes. What time are you leaving

HER: Not till wednesday lol i told you that! U should come here x

ME: haha i meant what time are you coming to beergarden. But yeh ill come to yours, how do i get there?

1 hour later - 3:20am ME: Whats doing beb?Come meet me outside beergarden now

 Should have mentioned that she flaked and didnt reply to my last txt.

I sent her a weak re engagement txt today

ME: Whats up pumpkin, how was the rest of your night.(i think thats fuckn lame. I obv already know how the rest of her night went lol)

This girl is here for 2 more days. Should i double text her if she doesnt reply to this? Roughly what should the double text say?